Advice needed on Feral Kitten! (Long Island NY)

kittiesrus

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I love this site and all the great advice and really could use some of my own.

"Dandelion" is one of 6 kittens from a 10-cat feral colony in our area.  We did TNR with the adults, but the kittens we have hung onto to socialize and overall that has been a lot of work but has gone better than I would have expected.  From frightened, angry little guys they are now purring and playful and we have already placed 4 of the 6 in their new homes!  One girl is sweet but still extremely shy so we are hanging on to her for a bit longer, but I am optimistic.  Then there's Dandelion.  

He was the last kitten we trapped - the final one.   And one of the biggest.  We think the kittens were born in June - which puts them at about the 3.5 month mark.  Some of his siblings we trapped on labor day weekend.  We have only had Dandelion about a week and a half now, and after we got him neutered we got him into his own crate in my daughter's room where there are two of his more social littermates.  He has to stay in his crate because we have not been able to handle him.  He does not like to be touched at all and will hiss and growl if we try.  He loves eating chicken baby food and will eat it off our fingers, and will come almost to the crate door to get some.  We talk to him sweetly and try and pet him while he eats, but he still resists and cowers in the corner of the crate and gets defensive even when I am changing the water bowl or littler.  I actually think he's regressed some and is now growling and takes a swat once in a while. 

Not sure what else to do with this fella, since he has not responded the way the others have.  I am kind of thinking that a larger crate or pen might be better for him, because I think he might feel a little trapped now - I do have a big two tier kitten pen that I could transfer him to.  Interested to know what you all think on how to work with him, and get him set up.  I feel bad he is so angry and am frustrated we haven't been able to get through his thick kitten noggin!

Thank you!!!
 

ondine

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It sounds like he just needs time.  A week isn't long, especially when they are a little older.  He's overwhelmed at all the new sights and sounds he's encountering and is coping the only way he knows how.

His more social siblings will help here.  He will observe their friendliness and learn from it.  You can also spend quiet time in his room.  Read out loud to him or just tell him about your day.  No sudden moves and don't approach him quickly.

If you reach out to him, you can offer your fist.  It will look like a cat offering its head for a head bump.  Try this cautiously - he may swipe and you don't need that.

I would just keep his routine the same, visit him often and give him time.  Remember, too, he may not ever be a lap cat.  Like people, cats have different personalities and he may just be a little shy and stand offish.

Thank you for helping them all!
 

msaimee

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The three ferals that I took into my house over the past 3 years (aged 3 months to 10 months) and socialized had a room of their own, not a crate. In the room is a 6 foot cat tree with cubby holes to hide in, catnip toys, a closet with a pet carrier in the back and a blanket, food, water, and a litter box. The cat would have space to run around and play in, and also places to hide that were within my sight. I would bring each of my other cats one by one into the room to hold and pet in front of the feral cat. After a few weeks time, I would be able to engage and play with the feral using a wand toy or laser toy. Within anywhere from a week to a month, the cat would begin to get the run of the house and interact with the other cats. The last feral kitten I brought into my house 6 months ago only recently started allowing me to pet her. It took time, but I allowed her to trust me on her own terms and in her own time. A lot of feral cats become depressed, frustrated and angry when they are caged or crated. If the crating method does not work for this particular kitten, I suggest that you try to give him his own room where he can play and behave like a normal kitten, and allow him to become socialized on his timetable. It takes more time and patience to do it this way, but it can work out very well in the end. At least it has for me.
 
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kittiesrus

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Thanks for the replies guys!  Much appreciated.  We did make some progress just yesterday.  Basically feeding as a two person operation - one to distract him with the food, and the other to sneak petting in.  We actually got to pet him while he ate and then kept petting him when he was done.  Last night he let my daughter pet him without food, and without hissing.  So its somewhat encouraging.  Unfortunately I don't have a room I can give this baby for his own, but my friend has a two tier kitten pen that she can lend me so thinking that might be better for him.  Let you know how we make out with that. :)
 
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kittiesrus

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Dandelion Update!  So we got our kitten pen in place yesterday.  Lots more room for kitty, which is good on its own.  But Dandelion still balled up in one corner and didn't really want to move even for food.  So we put his sister in the pen with him!  She's the only other kitten not adopted out yet, she is very sweet and purry and you can handle her easily - but still really skittish.  She has this really calm temperment - and I thought she might set a good example for behavior.  This morning he seems to be closer to "normal kitten" - moving around more, playing with toys and he likes to hide behind her but she also offers some competition at mealtime (not really but he thinks so) and he will now climb over anything to get to the bowl first.  AND I petted him no problem this morning while he was eating - even his belly!  You still can't approach him head on but as long as I respected that he was pretty good.  And Bella, the sister does not mind hanging out in the pen - some of her more rambunctious brothers would have taken issue with that.  Still a ways to go but feel a lot better about it today :)
 
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kittiesrus

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Dandelion continues to have good moments and not so good ones.  Past couple of days he didn't hiss as much.  I am careful how I approach him which helps.  He will hop right down from his platforms at mealtime, and I can pet him pretty good, he is still hesitant but better.  Last night though, after mealtime I was hanging out with the kittens a bit and then I reached in the pen to pet Bella - the tame one - and Dandelion growled at me.  And then he swatted me good! And kept growling.  I wasn't even trying to touch him!  I am not expecting a lap cat but he really is not backing down.  I am going to keep working on him - and keep my fingers crossed that he will become more accepting of us humans...The pen is pretty roomy but I haven't really been too keen about letting him run around the room because I can't handle him yet - and I am sure he'd just hide.  Should I try it? 
 

ondine

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I'd give it a little more time.  Something you did - or something in his mood - made him a little wary.  You can only guess sometimes.

Remember, too, he may never be a lap cat.  The cat in my avatar, Chester, allows a head scratch every few weeks.  Go any lower and he bolts.  Recently (after ten years in the house!), he's been allowing me to brush him.  I would never have thought that in a million years but it is happening.
 

msaimee

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If you let him out of his pen, he will hide for a while, but at night time when everyone is asleep, he will eat and play and use the litter box. He may even end up next to you on your bed. This has been my experience. The good thing about letting him out of his pen is that you could play with him with a wand or a laser toy. He would get to be a normal kitten and have positive interaction with you. Play therapy helps so much with socializing feral kittens. Also, you may always need to be careful about the way you approach him to pet him. My three-year-old feral was domesticated at 4 months of age and I can pet him and pick him up and he will sit on my lap. However, I still need to be careful how I approach him. If I just approach him head-on with my hand reaching out to him, he will swat and hiss. The defensive response of feral cats is deeply ingrained, and anyone who has one for a pet just needs to be mindful of that and careful When approaching them. But they are still wonderful and loving and fun pets to have. Glad to hear you're making progress.
 
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kittiesrus

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I let Dandelion out of the pen last Friday - almost a week ago. So now the two sibling kittens have the run of the room. There are lots of things to hide behind, and to explore. Yes he just hid the first few days. He is always really food driven though and will come out of hiding when I bring his meal in. Could not touch him at first, I would try to get the food bowl as close to me as possible and sometimes he would eat while I held the bowl, but that was about it. And if I moved an arm or a leg he'd bolt.

As of yesterday I could pet him, while he ate, out in the open! He'd realize it and shirk back a bit then continue eating so I continue petting. He is out more, and roams the room while we're there, even jumping on things that are close so he can get a better vantage point on you. I can stand up and he is wary but doesn't run. I can move around to get his dry food out, and he doesn't run! Seem like good signs, right? We play with both kittens and Bella the sister is really into it. He kind of hangs back but is really interested I think he will jump in one day soon.
 
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kittiesrus

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SO - I have not posted in a while.  I was not feeling good about Dandelion's progress.  Everybody told me to release him, but I couldn't do it.   I was really worried he would never come around.  Lo and behold - New Year's weekend he finally let me pet him in a non-eating moment.  I can approach him now when he is relaxed and he rolls around and enjoys his petting and purrs his furry little head off.  Finally some trust!  It took him 3 and a half months.  I am working now on the "drive by" petting - getting him to allow us to touch him when he is walking around.  Sometimes he lets us :)   I realize he might never be a lap cat, but finally being able to really pet him is a big deal.  So relieved!!!
 

msaimee

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That's wonderful news, thanks for sharing! Three and a half months is not long at all to tame an older feral kitten. And your kitty may very well end up being a lap cat. The last feral kitten I took in was very wild. It took six months before I could pet her. Now she is a completely happy, spoiled lap cat who follows me around like a puppy dog. It takes time and patience to tame a feral kitten, but it is well worth it. I'm glad you were persistent.
 
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kittiesrus

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I have to tell you guys - now that these kittens are 2 years old already - that Dandelion is my buddy. He still has his quirky skittishness and he is bonded only to me (nobody else can pet him) but boy does he LOOOOOVE me. He follows me around and meows to be petted and when I get home from work he appears with some greeting boy. Sleeps by my feet every night and he is just the cutest thing ever. Anyone who is doubting their work with a feral kitten should take heart, have the patience and give it time. So so worth it!!
 

msaimee

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:hyper:Thanks for your encouraging update! I'm sure it's a source of encouragement for those who are in the beginning stages of socializing a feral cat. It's been a year-and-a-half since you had last posted. Did it take that long to socialize your kitty, or has it been going well for a while? It sounds like dandelion has a very happy and content life. Good job!
 
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kittiesrus

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It's been going well for a while. Dandelion has it good :) He is very sweet and gentle and not aggressive. He turned around fairly quckly once I was able to get my hands on him (which as I had mentioned took 3 months). When he was letting me pet him I'd try lifting him up and putting him back down (not trying to hold him, just show him I could move him and he would be OK). Eventually I'd lift him onto or off of the bed (but still not try to hold him). We worked up to the point where I pick him up and he just melts like its the best thing ever. He does not want to sit on my lap (i still move him there and am working on him) but I can hold him and carry him around. Interestingly one of my civilized cats is a big lap cat but does not like to be held or carried. So there!
 
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