Should I keep 3 kittens I love? Need advice badly.

I really need advice.  I am having a hard time giving up the last of 6 kittens found abandoned at 2 weeks old.  I bottle fed them and when they were 3 months old I gave three to neighbors, another to the family across the street and one to my brother.  I planned to keep one of them.  Each time I gave one away it broke my heart.  I wont go into all the reasons but I got 2 of them back within a week. I have fallen in love with them and they seem to love me.  I just decided to keep all three.  Well 6 weeks ago I lost my job. I am single, late 50's and my house is paid for.  I now need to get them spayed and neutered as they are almost 5 months old.  There are low cost clinics here based on income that I can access BUT I keep thinking that if I can't financially care for them then I don't deserve them.  This is temporary, I am looking for another job and living off a small savings right now.  I feel like these are my babies!  They sleep with me, wake me each morning with kitty love and follow me from room to room.  I have cried for two days over this.  They are happy here, I am their mom cat and I love them sooo much.  I am torn but want to do what's right for them.  Even when I get a job it will be tough financially to play catch up.  (I do not have a degree or skills to land a big paying job but I have always worked hard).  Would it be better to take them to a no kill shelter?  To be put in a cage after having the run of the house and a warm bed and mommy to sleep with?  I just don't know what to do. Please help with advice

A little about me and how I got the kittens below:

Last April, I lost my best friend of 15 years (A big old mutt dog)  His best friend is an outdoor cat we found on one of our walks that was bleeding and hurt.  I wrapped her in my jacket and took her to a vet.  After she had been stitched up, I decided to take her home and nurse her until she was well enough to go to a shelter.  At the time I had two 80+ lb dogs that I was afraid would hurt her but they all got along so well I kept her and named her Mookie and got her spayed.  She refused to stay inside, always following the dogs out through their doggy door.  That was 8 years ago.  I lost Bandit at 17 years old and Mookie knew and she loved on Ozzy to help him cope.  Ozzy passed away last April and a few weeks later my neighbor found 6 abandoned kittens under his porch and I agreed to bottle feed them and care for them since my schedule allowed it.  It was probably too soon after Ozzy's death but I thought maybe Mookie would enjoy them (She did not).  Mookie is an outdoor cat and there is no amount of trying to keep her inside.  She cries for hours at the door and never once used the litter box I set up for her. I live at the end of a dead end street and am surrounded by woods.  We get very little traffic. I plan to keep the 3 kittens as indoor cats of course.  If I had my way Mookie would be too but she has a mind of her own.

My pets I love for life.

As long as you can afford to feed them I say keep them. That's what low cost clinics are for.

Thank you for replying CareBear.  Yes I can afford to feed them and afford litter for their boxes.  I just know how expensive vet care can be.  Mookie only see's the vet once a year for a check-up unless she is sick and I have been very lucky.  I have to admit I know much more about dogs than cats since I have always had mutt dogs from the shelter and they have all lived to be 15-17 years old, until I found Mookie.

As I said I want to do what's best for these babies. So I would like to hear all sides and any advice.

You sound like a very loving guardian. You absolutely deserve to keep them. You are already are getting them fixed even though you are in between jobs. You will do what you need to do for these kitties and they deserve a home with you.

carebearbaby1 said:

As long as you can afford to feed them I say keep them. That's what low cost clinics are for.

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I agree! Plus, you are job searching so this is just a temporary situation as far as your finances go. Those babies need your love [emoji]10084[/emoji]️

Thank you HelloMissKitty and LotsOfFur. as I'm typing this I have 2 of them climbing me.  I am crying.  I told them.  Handsome, Keke and Pumpkin that we won't ever be rich or live in a mansion but we will have lots of love : )  My family thinks I'm crazy.  One said "They are only cats"!!!!  What????

I am so glad I found this site.  I have been reading many posts and you all "Get it!"

We DO get it [emoji]10084[/emoji]️ And I hope that you ultimately decide to keep Handsome, KeKe and Pumpkin.

I have a friend who has five now 10 year old siblings who have always been together. My friend has gone through tremendous ups and downs financially but fought to keep them with her and together even though she often had to go without. They bring her such joy and it is a gift that they have lived their entire lives together.

Please keep us posted on how you and the babies are doing and I'm pretty sure I speak for everyone when I say that I'd love to see some photos of your babies [emoji]128522[/emoji]

You have to keep the kittens. They make you happy & they love you very much. There are low-cost places for having them neutered/spayed. Once you have that done & their shots, hopefully they won't need a vet's care for some time. Some vets even have payment plans. The thing they need most is to be loved & you can't put a price on that.

Thank you to everyone who responded.  I feel better about keeping them.  Funny thing, they have all been extra lovey today, almost as if they knew I was struggling with the decision to keep them.  I believe they (and all of you) have helped me make my decision.  I am going to keep them.  I am still worried for our future financially but I don't think splitting them up or putting them in a shelter is the answer. Thank you HelloMissKitty for your story about your friend and the five siblings she has had for 10 years even through her financial struggles.  It gave me hope.  Mookie will not be happy about it.  She is a dog cat, LOL.  She even loves up to the neighbors dog but hisses at the kittens.  Hopefully they will grow her.  I am going to post a photo of Mookie comforting Ozzy after Bandit passed away and then try to upload photo's of Handsome, Keke and Punkin.

This is Handsome.  You can see why I named him that.  Isn't he just so handsome!

This is Punkin.  She is orange, black and white with golden eyes.  She is the shy one, the most standoff-ish.  While Keke and Handsome are always by my side, Punkin likes to go lay in my bed by herself but she doesn't mind if I go lay with her for some loving.  Here she is knocking things off the bathroom shelf and looking a bit guilty.

And finally here is Keke.  She is the one I had planned to keep all along because she HAS to be on my lap or right beside me all the time. She was the needy one and I just couldn't see her with anyone else but her "mom cat"...Me.  In this picture I had just come out of the shower to find her patiently waiting in the sink.  The look on her face say's "What is that silly thing on your head?  That's not your hair"  They all had to stare at the towel on mommy's head for a minute.

They are all beautiful. SO glad you are keeping them all. Things will work out for you I am quite sure.

Omigoodness...I'm so in love with all of your furkids [emoji]10084[/emoji]️ I too am so glad you are keeping them all. Those sweet faces!! I'm sure that Mookie will grow to love them in time.

I'm happy to hear that my friend's story gave you hope. Those cats have seen her thru many tough times and she just knew that splitting them up was not in their best interest or her best interest. They get by just fine and are rich in love.

@themomcat, sorry I found your post late, but glad to see you decided to keep the kittens.  Last fall, I found three tiny kittens sitting beside my gravel road while I was out looking for a couple of dogs I'd taken in that accidentally got let off together and one being a coonhound, went running off together.  As soon as I saw them sitting on the side of the road, in a spot where many animals have been dumped, I told my bf to "Stop!" and quickly got out and went over to them.  At first, they ran into the weeds, but when I called to them, they all three came out to me and were the most adorable little dirtballs you've ever seen.  At the time, I already had 3 other cats and 6 dogs, including the two that I was out looking for.  My bf, who hasn't had to go through the sadness of giving away animals, only to be sad and feel guilty that they didn't go to a good home like I'd been led to believe they would, didn't want to keep them.  That first 5 minutes, anyway.  It's been my experience that all of these cats and dogs come to me for a reason.  Usually before or around the time another one passes.  In this case, it was before the owners of the dogs I'd taken in decided they wanted them back, even though they hadn't bothered to look for them in the over four months that I'd been taking care of them and only found out about them when I put up a sign about them missing.

Longer story short, three cats became six and even though my income is far from steady (I'm self employed), I do without vacations, eating out, etc., to care for all 11 cats and dogs and 2 chickens.  I wouldn't have it any other way and the joy they bring is better than the best tasting dinner out, which is quickly gone and left with nothing to show for it or the vacations that would take me away from this crazy bunch for longer than I'd want to be away from them. 

Don't let your family or any one else who doesn't understand the bond between animals and people influence you, either.  Among other things she said and did, one of the final straws with my mother was when I told her that if anything ever happened to me, the only thing I cared about was my animals being taken care of.  Her reply was that there would be graves behind my pond.  She denied remembering she said it, but I'll never forget.  While we grew up with animals all my life as a kid, they weren't allowed in the house and we never had the bond with any of them that I have with mine today. To this day, she hasn't, which I find very sad and says a lot about her character (in addition to other things she's said and done over the years).

As far as vet care goes, other than initial vaccinations and spay/neuter, we had one incident in the last year where I needed to take one of the cats to the vet.  The other stuff, like allergies or respiratory issues can be solved by home remedies.  I use home remedies for myself too and really like the site earthclinic.com for all of us. 

Times might be a bit tough and scary right now, but things always have a way of working out and you'll always be glad you made the decision to keep your little babies. 

WhatsOneMore, Your story brought tears to my eyes.  It has been mentioned by several friends and family members that it was really too soon after Ozzy's death to foster a litter kittens and that was probably why it was so hard to give up the kittens but not once had I considered that maybe they were brought to me for a reason.  That it was destined.  I don't know how that escaped my mind!  Maybe the financial worry and being in my 50's, job are not as readily available as they once were.  I truly believe in fate. I believe things happen for a reason.  And I can see how those 3 kittens you took off the side of the road were there for you to find.

I felt that way about Bandit and Ozzy.  Each one came into my life at strange times.  I had just gone through a divorce and raising my sons alone when I went with a friend to the shelter to look for her runaway dog.  I had no intentions of getting a dog with all my bills!  This one puppy just kept whimpering at the front of the cage and pushing the other puppies away and I just got a tug in my heart and went through the adoption process and brought home Bandit (We found friends and family to go adopt the rest of those puppies also)  Bandit eased the pain of my divorce and became my very best friend. I didn't even know I needed him as much as I did and for 17 years, he was my constant companion.  Our vacations were camping and canoeing and he loved it and then a few years later, Ozzy just came into our life unexpectedly and he lived to be 15.  Then one day while walking Bandit and Ozzy, we heard this mewing in a field and found a hurt and bleeding cat.  Again, the last thing I would ever think was having a cat.  My naughty dogs chased cats!  But once the dogs saw that I loved the kitty (who the vet thought was around a year old) they accepted her.  One morning Bandit was breathing hard and laid on the porch.  Mookie just kept rubbing him and licking him.  I Knew somehow that he was passing and so did Mookie.  He closed his eyes and let out his last breath.  Mookie was much more attached to Bandit then Ozzy but the way she kept loving on Ozzy the next few days was amazing.  Ozzy was diagnosed with heart failure and put on diuretics and Vetmedin and with light exercise, a home-made no salt diet and his meds, he lived another year,  His last few days, Mookie was all over him and she seemed to know before me that it was almost time.  He stopped eating and then stopped urinating and I made that hard choice to have a mobile vet come and put him to sleep under his favorite tree.  Mookie is an outdoor cat, who only comes in to eat, get pet for a few minutes and then she wants out but the next few days she rarely went out.  I had to take a few days off work from grief and Mookie stayed by my side. Again I was amazed.

Then the 6 kittens came into my life at only 2 weeks old.  I had no idea how to care for them.  Thanks to websites and youtube video's, I learned.  I could have kept all of them, I became so emotionally attached to all of them but I had promised them to people I knew would love and spoil them.  They kept calling and asking if their kitten was ready and I put it off until they were 2 months because I loved them so.  Their new owners are all on my street and I get to see for myself that they are very loved however, one was brought back the next day due to their 5 year old having allergies to him.  I was glad to have him back honestly and then a few days later my brother was hospitalized and asked me to go pick up his kitten Punkin and care for her until he got out but unfortunately, he lost his leg and with complications he is staying with my mother and will be for probably a year and she is highly allergic.  He only had Punkin for a few days but he said she didn't seem happy at his house.

So I have to believe that they were brought to me for a reason.  And my struggle with taking them to a no kill shelter (which I think is better than strangers from craigslist because a shelter is more equipped to screen potential adopters) Just may be fate screaming at me that they are supposed to be with me forever.

Don't ever use Craigslist for animals - that site is full of weirdos & hoarders.

themomcat when I read your first post, the first thought that came to my mind was that those kittens were brought to you for a reason [emoji]10084[/emoji]️

I do not know why it did not dawn on me that they were brought to me for a reason.  Most everything that has happened in my life turned out to be for a reason (whether I liked it or not). 

I will be asking many questions and sharing many wonderful story's about my little family on this site.

I had expected a lot of replies that if I loved them I would give them away to people who were more financially stable.  But you wonderful cat lover's made me realize that we can always make or find money, we can always find a way but I can not replace the love I feel for these babies.  And my heaven's, the way they love on me and follow me around, I just felt like it would upset them terribly to be ripped from me. (I know that sounds dramatic LOL but that's how I felt).

Of course it was fate that sent them to you, Silly!  I believe in fate also, and on at least 3 occasions, a new animal (or in the kittens' case, 3) has showed up when others had left or were soon to leave. 

And being in your 50's can work to your advantage when it comes to finding a job.  My ex and I had no problem hiring people in their late 40's and beyond because they had good work ethics (usually) and we didn't have to worry about them like we did the 20-somethings who were sneaking cell phones and smoking during working hours.  I'd recommend looking for a small individually owned business.  I'm not sure what your experience is, but my bf got his job by just calling people up in the field he worked in and asking them if they needed any help.  Sometimes people do, but don't ever get around to actually running an ad or whatever.  It's a pain to run ads, screen people, interview people, etc., etc.  If a good candidate comes along and you happen to be needing someone, it's a win-win for both parties.   If you'd like some help with your resume or whatever, just let me know and I'll help you however I can.