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Too attached?

post #1 of 16
Thread Starter 
I'm worried that my kitty is too attached to me. He has always been really affectionate, but he turned into being a really clingy cat. Not that I mind - I love it! But I'm not going to be around as much eventually b/c I'm getting a job. Right now I am home during the day, and only gone for no more than a few hours at a time.

When I'm in the same room with him, he will sleep on me or right next to me and when I am out of the room for a while (I shut the door to "his" room when I'm not home) he'll bury himself under his blankets to sleep. He wants to be near me every second of the day. He stays in the room I'm in unless he's sleeping already - and even then sometimes he'll wake up, find me, and go to sleep next to me. He follows me around when he's awake. He rarely leaves the room I'm in unless I do, except to eat and that's only when I walk him to the kitchen.

I just don't know what I'm going to do. I'm worried he's going to be sad or it'll hurt his feelings when I have to leave him alone for longer during the day. Do you think he'll be okay? Or should I start getting him used to it - like leaving him in his room for longer, even when I'm home - or should I just let him stay this attached and clingy?

It's probably my fault b/c I held him almost 24/7 when I first brought him home, and so he loves to be held and carried around. Did I spoil him too much? I didn't think that was possible!

I don't think it's nerves or anxiety b/c he's not jittery at all and he loves meeting new people. He's used to this house and nothing really scares him.

post #2 of 16
Is Cupid an only cat?? Cats are very social animals so he will want to be with you at all times. My RB used to follow me everywhere and meet me at the door. I would tell her its time for bed and she'd go to the bedroom.

When you go to work, leave plenty for Cupid to do. New toys, bright sunny window, radio on low. Spend more time away from home so he'll get used to being alone for longer periods of time. I'm guessing there is no chance of a brother or sister to keep him company?

He'll be fine. All new mommas go thru this.

post #3 of 16
Thread Starter 
He's an only kitty. I can't get anything small & furry, like a rabbit b/c my roommate is allergic to them. I could look into getting another like him, but he was a gift from my roommate and I can't afford one. So he'll still be alone more until I can save for a brother or sister. *sigh*

So I'm all he has for now but I'm not going to be around as much. I just hope he's not sad or hurt.
post #4 of 16
So much for the ol' "Cats are independent and aloof!"

My Trent is similar to Cupid, although now he will leave the room if he's hungry or needs the litterbox. But he is almost always in the same room as I am. He can be very whiney when I'm not paying enough attention to him.

Remember, Cupid is still a baby! I'm sure as time goes on he will be a little less clingy, but it may just be his purrsonality too. He may be a little lonely when you first go to work, but he will adapt. Like Sweets said, leave him plenty of toys and access to a window to watch the world.
post #5 of 16
He's such a sweet little baby! Do u know anyone who
could either come in or take care of the kitten
during the day? Someone that could play with him,
love on him, and maybe feed him? This might give him
some small bit of security while u are gone during the day!--persia
post #6 of 16
Awwwww i know how you feel. I was, and still am the same with Rosie.
I used to get told off by my boyfriend when i used to get out of bed and go straight to her when i heard her cry.

She still follows me now. If i go into the kitchen she follows me in, if i go to the bathroom, she has to come in(shut the door on her and she'll cry until you open it!).

And when i collected Rosie from the cattery when i was away, she was 'very' clingy with me for days after.

Cupid will get into a routine when you start work. And if your like me, you will be dashing home on an evening to see her again!. The minute i switch the alarm off, she knows i'm back and starts meowing for me, and giving me headbutts all over!!.

But me personally, i don't think you've spoilt her, because that's how i have Rosie, and i wont ever change the way i am with her.

That picture of her is just gorgeous
post #7 of 16
Isn't Cupid still a kitten?
I'm sure it wasn't that long a go I saw his first photos of him wearing his jumper.

Kittens are clingy. Well, as cat owners, particularly first time cat owners, you do expect your kitty to be aloof and show little interest in you. What a difference it is when kitty wants to snuggle up to you and play with you. So, they do appear to be clingy.

Also as kittens, normally they would grow up in a litter with other playmates and mum to teach survival skills. You're now Cupid's mum and he's feeling dependent on you. With time as he grows older, that streak of independence will develop and he'll be less clingy. And before you know it, you could be posting "He's not so affectionate..."
post #8 of 16
OMG Mags, i hope i dont!!.

post #9 of 16
I didn't mean to cause you to be upset Susan.

Not all cats end up that way. Some cats are clingy due to their personality or upbringing.

Russell, my first cat, I literally had to train him to not sit on my lap while I was at the computer or studying uninvited. He's content in the same room with me. But I couldn't work with a kitty in my lap moving around or me not being able to move as I would disturb his royal highness.

And yes I ignore the midnight pleas for attention and play. The cats and including the new kitten Menchi know that when the humans are in bed they're not to be disturbed unless it's an emergency.
post #10 of 16
It's ok Mags you havent upset me.

I'll just bawl my eyes out with you lovely lot if she does change

post #11 of 16
Dori used to be just like that. She was really clingy and always wanted to be near me. I loved it! Now she wants to play more than she wants to "cuddle". Now most of the time when I try to cuddle with her and hold her she bites me, it's a playful bite, but it hurts! I do miss my cuddly sweet little kitty, but I do still get that time usually early in the morning.
post #12 of 16
Yeah I get the feeling these things change with time. Mine was really clingy when I first brought him home. Now that he trusts me and is used to having the security he is more independent. In fact it's more of a struggle that he wants to go outside. So after some time things should change.
post #13 of 16
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone.
post #14 of 16
It's funny, mine is getting much more independent. And I was just reading how cats do that, just like kids, they will actually rebel a little once they feel more safe and secure and like they can take care of themselves (ho ho) He still follows me around, but not as much. And he isn't jumping the lap immediately. I do kind of miss that but I realize that he also just feels safer and not as needy.
post #15 of 16
My cat Damian is 10 years old and thinks he is a dog. He greets me when I come home from work, then I can't shake him. When I do pick him up, he goes to suck on my ear lobe. Very strange I know!! If his sister Sheena, who is also 10 years old tries to come near me, or tries to sleep in my lap, he will come along, swat at her, and then lay where she was.
post #16 of 16
I feel quite honored that Sierra is so very attached to me, and I feel horrible everytime I have to leave her to go to work. Nothing can replace you, but I find it's a good idea to rotate toys every day and present a new and different box or paper bag every few days so your baby doesn't get bored with the same toys and you can feel good knowing that he is being well entertained in your absence. You can also leave an article of clothing that you have worn in one of his favorite spots. I recently got Sierra a "Talk to Me Treatball" that I think is fantastic. You put little pieces of food inside and record a message into it. Not only does she get exercise rolling it around to get the food out, but it's motion activated so it plays the message of me talking to her!
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