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The Ten Catmandments

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 
My MIL sent a birthday card (by Tomato?) that was so cute! It had the

"Ten Catmandments"

1. I am the lord of they house
2. Thou shalt have no other pets before me.
3. Thou shalt not ever ignore me.
4. I shall ignore thou when I feel like it.
5. Thou shalt be grateful that I even give thou the time of day.
6. Remember my food dish and keep it full.
7. Thou shalt spend most of thy money on toys and gifts for me.
8. Thou shalt always have thy lap ready for me to curl up in.
9. Thou shalt shower me with love and attention upon demand.
10. Above all, thou shalt do anything and everything it takes to keep me happy.

We obey you!
post #2 of 12
LOL, but true!
post #3 of 12
Cute- must have been written by a cat lover.
post #4 of 12
Phew! Glad I am following those to a T!
post #5 of 12

Actually, commandment #6 could apply to everyone in my family. Husband and kids included! LOL
post #6 of 12
Very cute and true!
post #7 of 12
Thread Starter 
I forgot to add the funniest part.... all of our kitties are rescues. This list is just as true for them, of course (they're CATS after all!). But every once in a while (especially when Gary wants to pet one of them and they're completely uninterested at the time), Gary says - you'd think they'd be a LITTLE grateful. He obviously forgets who he is in relation to the gods and goddesses that share our space, LOL!
post #8 of 12
LOL! cute.
post #9 of 12
Those are so cute! We follow all the catmandments at my house especially #'s 8 and 9.
BTW, I read the title a little too fast, and I thought this was going to be a thread
about the Ten Commandments! LOL!!!!!
post #10 of 12
Awesome thread!! And true too
post #11 of 12
Cat Commandments
Thou shalt not jump onto the keyboard when thy human is on the modem.
Thou shalt not pull the phone cord out of the back of the modem.
Thou shalt not unroll all of the toilet paper off the roll.
Thou shalt not sit in front of the television or monitor as thou are transparent.
Thou shalt not projectile vomit from the top of the refrigerator.
Thou shalt not walk in on a dinner party and commence licking thy butt.
Thou shalt not lie down with thy butt in thy human's face.
Thou shalt not leap from great heights onto thy human's genital region.
Fast as thou are, thou cannot run through closed doors.
Thou shalt not reset thy human's alarm clock by walking on it.
Thou shalt not climb on the garbage can with the hinged lid, as thou wilt fall in and trap thyself.
Thou shalt not jump onto the toilet seat just as thy human is sitting down.
Thou shalt not jump onto thy sleeping human's bladder at 4a.m.
Thou shalt realize that the house is not a prison from which to escape at any opportunity.
Thou shalt not trip thy humans even if they are walking too slow.
Thou shalt not push open the bathroom door when there are guests in thy house.
Thou shalt remember that thou are a carnivore and that houseplants are not meat.
Thou shalt show remorse when being scolded.
post #12 of 12
too cute
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