I was rather peeved yesterday (it's long)

After work I stopped in at a GF's house who'd been having trouble downloading her emails through Live Mail. I had gone in about three weeks ago when she called me frantically and said her computer was all messed up. Well, when I got there then, her computer had upgraded to Win 10. Got it all straightened out, got her emails to come in. Part of her problem is that, for some reason, Kaspersky is messing around with her email and sometimes emails don't come in. After being on the phone with her ISP tech support for quite a while (it's not a problem on their end, but they were super nice and helped me anyway), we decided that, if she started to have trouble again, she simply could turn Kaspersky off, download her email, and then turn Kasperksy back on again. No, it's not the best solution, but it's the only one I can come up with....and her ISP agreed. (And, in fact, I've been having the same sort of trouble between Outlook 2013 and Kaspersky myself. Only in my case, Outlook refuses to download anything. I'm going online to get my email. It's a PITB, but at least I can get emails. I don't know what else to do and have tried other ways, but nothing is working.)

So anyway, she called me the other night and wanted me to come in right away because her email wasn't downloading anymore. I told her to turn Kasperksy off, download, then turn it back on. She said she had already done that and it didn't work. So I couldn't go in on Sunday and I was busy earlier this week. I went in yesterday. She told me that was fine.

Got there and she was in the midst of card club (which didn't make me amused because then she couldn't pay attention to what I was doing on her computer). Told me to go back to the room, turn the computer on, and do what I had to do. She didn't even bother to come back! How will somebody ever learn anything if they don't even try? I was frustrated. 

Got the computer running, turned off Kaspersky, downloaded her email with no trouble whatsoever, turned Kaspersky back on, updated Kaspersky, and walked out to the kitchen.

"It's working fine now. Didn't you turn K off to try to download the emails?"

"Oh no, I was too tired the other day. That's what I have you for. So it's working OK?"

"Yes, your emails are downloaded. And I updated K while I was here."

"I was going to tell you to do that. But I don't like the way the emails are coming in. Fix it!"

"I'm sorry, I don't know how."

"Call somebody!"

"Your ISP tech support doesn't know how either, at this point."

"Well, you're no help!" And then she snickered.....and so did everybody else playing cards.

You know, I did what I could. I do not know how to fix the problem. If I did, I'd fix it on my own blasted computer, too. I suggested that she call the Geek Squad since she had bought the laptop from Best Buy. She didn't want to spend the money, not when I could do it for free. I noted that well, I hadn't been able to fix it. She said, "Yeah. I'm aware of that."

I left and came home. And the further I drove, the more.....peeved.....I got. Told Rick about it and we decided that that's the last time I work on her computer. She couldn't even come back to watch what I was doing, got all snotty with me because I couldn't fix the problem better, and basically told me that I was useless, in front of a room full of women I don't even know. I tried to get her to come back to the room with me, so that she might learn, but she wasn't remotely interested. And I sat back there by myself, working on her computer. I don't know; there's something wrong with that picture.

I'm done. I'm not going to let her take advantage of me like that again. It was rude, IMO.

i think you made a very good decision, that that was the last time you'll be working on your friend's computer! and, you did better than i would have. i would have lost patience much more quickly, and would have become quite annoyed. 

yes, there was definitely 'something wrong with that picture'. 

Wow, that is one ungrateful person.  One thing for sure is the next time all else fails and you are no where in sight, she will appreciate all you have done.  Unfortunately it will most likely be too late.

My hubby is the neighborhood computer "fix it guy" and he actually has no problem with saying no, too busy, sorry.

I've dealt with many with that "take it for granted" attitude and I'll be honest, once you let go you'll feel better.

Now in the future if she changes her tune and actually says thank you, and apologizes to you then maybe help her, but until then you should take care of yourself and lend a helping had to people who appreciate you, if you like.

I'm frustrated for you. LOL  wow.  I feel for you.

I sympathize greatly!  I've had it happen to me too many times, I just play absolutely dumb now!  I get home networking questions.  I told the last "friend" that asked me for help that I was going to invoice her....that stopped it all!

We have a friend who fixes our computers when we have issues.  If it is something we can fix with him talking us through it on the phone he expects us to try to fix it with his guidance. If it is not a simple fix we bring the computer to his house when he has the time to work on it. We do not expect him to drop things to fix our computers.  He works a lot of hours for his job we work around his work schedule.  Your friend was very rude to you.  If we treated our friend that way he would not continue to help us and the friendship would probably be over too.  You are not her personal assistant and she needs to step up and learn how to deal with this simple issue.  

Well, now I'm glad you didn't make her any Lemon Blueberry Scones!

If she has the nerve to call you for help again, tell you want $40 an hour just like every other computer tech.

Before I did my own computer work, my BIL was my computer guru. He'll still help me when I really need it, but boy, I try to make sure I can't fix it on my own first. I'll spend hours back here, working on this, tweaking that, futzing around with stuff before I call. I've offered him money, but he's quite happy with me making him a blueberry buckle or making cookies for him. And whenever I do any baking, I always text him to say that he can stop in on his way home from work for whatever I've baked. 

Not that I think my GF should do that. That's not what I'm implying. But what's wrong with a simple Thank You. I guess that's my point. And I felt belittled yesterday. I was really upset. And I'm frustrated that she won't even try.

Thanks for reading. I do appreciate it.

catlover73 said:

 You are not her personal assistant and she needs to step up and learn how to deal with this simple issue.  

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I'd be peeved, too, Pam, and that would be the last time I tried to help her. Her behavior was obnoxious.

I would be really peeved as well and I wouldn't help her again either.  That is the way you treat someone you don't know and are paying them for a service, not someone who is supposed to be a friend and helping.