My Fur-Brother of 22 years is not doing so well...

On July 28th, 2016 my 22 year-old cat, Smokey, had trouble urinating. He tried and tried going in and out of his litter box multiple times per hour and howled as he was trying. When he finally went a little, he urinated out of his litter box and we saw blood in his urine. We rushed him to the vet right away. The vet checked him out and gave us antibiotics to give to him. He was continuing to eat during this whole ordeal and seemed like he was doing a little bit better and urinated a little more than before. Then on August 5th he seemed to be constipated and he then started to have trouble urinating again and continued to howl. He seemed to have relapsed. He then started having diarrhea on August 7th and had trouble standing while he went. Diarrhea wore him out those few days. This is when he started to stop eating and drank very little. On August 9th, he stopped eating completely and is hardly drinking any water. We are trying to force feed him, but is completely uninterested in food. The only way he drinks a little water is if we put the bowl of water under his head, and he barely licks the water. The Vet wants to charge an arm and a leg to keep him overnight to do tests, etc, but that financial burden is too much for me right now and at his old age of 22 it may not be fair to have him go through anymore of this. As of today, August 15th, he still urinates very little, is continuing to not eat, is VERY weak, now very skinny, barley drinks, sometimes vomits clear-ish fluid and howls as if he is in pain. His feces is also tar-like now and I read that this is due to blood in his feces which could mean kidney failure...

He is howling as I type this and I do not know what to do! I feel like I am failing him and making him suffer, but I can't let him go. I have had him since I was 3 years old and he IS my brother. I am a complete wreck. I do not want him to suffer. I may take him in and put him to sleep very soon, but cannot even see myself doing that. How does one even control themselves stepping into the vet, knowing their buddy is ready to take their last breath? I am bawling just thinking about that. I would honestly lose it, look like a complete wreck and bawl my eyes out and wouldn't even be able to speak to the employees. How do I go about this?? What is the process like? How do the vets handle an owner who is losing their mind during that process? This completely sucks.

I am SOOO sorry for you having to deal with this. I had to say goodbye to the light of my life in 1999 (on Christmas of all days!) to a kitty I'd had since I was 12, and I was 30 when I had to say goodbye. It kills you.

My vet once told me that when a cat gets to a certain age, it's about QUALITY of life, not quantity. your kitty may have a blocked urethra being he's male (crystals), which could cause discomfort peeing. He also could be dealing with pancreatitis which is very painful (my two 16 and a half yr olds are on the end of their 3rd bout ). 

Kitty could also have picked up a virus---best to get him to the vet to do blood work and see what is going on. There is lots you can do to make your kitty feel much better and enjoy life--so don't feel you are doing anything wrong---see what the vet/blood work says and go from there.

Sounds like your kitty needs sub-cue fluids to start, and anti nauseant and see how that helps him feel.

I am going to go the other way on this . I hope with compassion and care as the other poster had. Your kitty is in his late 90's, you express concern about the cost of the blood work ? Everyone with pets has to balance the cost of care with the benefit, if the vet could make him comfortable well he faded away at home would you feel better? In case of a injury it can be clear that putting down your pet is the kind thing to do, I think with sickness it is harder I had to put down two cats two summers ago with in 5 days of each other. It was very hard one was elderly but not that old 16 and after basic blood work urine checks and will no leads where else to go next she was give pain med but 2 weeks she just failed completely lay there crying unable to walk we could of force fed her and cleaned her up but our feeling she was no longer going to be a cat doing cat things . The other cat was 2 and clearly not going to get better but after 3 days in the hospitail he seemed fine (iv fluids) he eat a last meal and purred in my arms I lost it the staff were great , I pulled myself together for my then 4 and 7 year old and took him home and put him under the willow tree. My husband had been with the other cat, he had resuced her from under a front step starving and filthy 16 years earlier. I guess what I trying to say is that saying good bye to a loved one is something that happens to all of us and most 90 year olds eould not want heroic measures to keep them alive .
I know my grand father didn't, if you think your ready take someone with you.
You know I had a boyfriend who took his cat to be put down because his mom couldn't he was 26 the cat 24 ,his sister took the childhood dog the year after you not alone !
Take care of your self

The greatest love you can give is to let them go when the time comes.  It IS hard, so very, very hard, but you do not want him to suffer.  I'm sure that is the last thing in this world that you want for him. 

The staff at the Vet's office is used to dealing with this, and people falling apart.  They give you time and space to gather yourself.  And who cares anyway if you are a wreck when you leave, which is only natural. Everyone there will empathize.  But at least you little furry friend will be in a better place than suffering if he cannot get better. 

Most of us here have been thru this, some of us multiple times, and it never gets any easier, never.  But it's worth it to have to joy of these wonderful little creatures for even a short time

As someone on the outside looking in . . . it really does seem to me as if your cat is suffering.  As his custodian, his care is in your hands.  Listen to your vet and to your gut. Better to be too soon than too late.

You're all he has in this world.  You have the ability to end his suffering. 

My thoughts are with you.

So many hugs for you

This is one of the absolute hardest things we deal with as cat guardians. I'm going through it myself with my sweet girl who isn't even 9 yet; she has cancer and is declining quickly.

This thread/post from one of our TCS members has really given me strength. I hope it will do the same for you.
http://www.thecatsite.com/t/237066/when-the-moment-comes

Hello all,

UPDATE: I took Smokey in and he is now in kitty heaven. No more pain and suffering and a huge relief. I felt a lot better after accepting what was best for both of us. This whole ordeal makes me not want another pet again since he was my first and only pet.

Thank you all for your help and condolences!

I am so, so sorry for your loss. You need time to grieve. Don't make any decisions about another pet yet--you have to take time to process this.  I know when I had to make the decision, I knew it was the right one, but letting go of something you love more than anything is the hardest thing to do. (((HUGS))))

Remember the good times you had with you kitty. And when your ready for a new pet you will know. For some a baby cat right away helps . Other don't want one for years say maybe when the have kids of there own
Peace

I felt several years ago like you do now after losing our 17 year old feline friend, Chester.  I declared then "No more pets", as the pain of their loss is too great. 

As time passes, you can start to remember your friend and all the happiness you shared, without all the raw pain you're feeling today. 

Hopefully you'll be like me and adopt a new kitty that  can again enrich your life.  I'll never be able to replace Chester, but my new friend, Gracie, is again an important part of our family.

Thank-you for loving you kitty so much, and sharing with us.

The TCS team would like you to know that we are so very sorry for your loss. 22 yours is a very special length of time to have been able to share with Smokey, and it takes a long time to find a way through losing such a special friend after that length of time too.   I share your pain through my own memories of loosing my own cats 6 years ago, shortly before her 22nd birthday.  

Your decision was a difficult one to make, and difficult to get used to Smokey not being there with you now, but he will always be in your memories:  hopefully as time passes you will feel more of the happiness of those memories and less of the pain of recent days.  

Threads are locked after someone has suffered such a loss, as a sign of respect. We invite you to place a tribute at http://www.thecatsite.com/f/19/crossing-the-bridge  as an enduring testimony to your friend.