vacation worries

I have been try to prepare my cats for when I go on vacation they are very attached and my female within the last few months is finally coming around to wanting attention. I have been telling them and kind of slowly packing so they know I will be leaving for a little bit and they have been extra extra clingy I cant go 10 minutes without someone crying for me or cuddling with me or following me around the house. My now fiance will be staying with them while I am away so its someone they know but he isn't very affectionate towards them he is very much a dog person. One of my cats has herpes and I can already see the starting signs of him getting bad again I know me leaving will make him go into full blown herpes flare up. I will leave the card I have for the animals medical bills with my fiance so in case something happens to any of my animals he can take them to the vet and get them help. I am only gone for 5 days but I have a very bad feeling they will be very upset while I am gone. Anything else I can do to help them?

It's great that they'll get to stay in their familiar home. That will likely help. Is your fiance able to visit them a few times before you go? maybe bringing them treats each time so that they start to associate him with something good? One thing I found with our clingy-est boy when we would go away is that he would start sleeping in the hampers, so we'd make a point of leaving a few comfy pieces of worn (slightly smelly) clothes around for them to sleep in if they felt uneasy.  Our boy loved fleece tops, our girl used to enjoy sleeping in pants (although only when we weren't home)

My fiance lives with me so they are familiar with him my youngest we even got together but the other two have lived with him for over a year now but he isn't a big fan of the cats. My girl gets jealous or mad and she pees and destroys my clothes so I cant leave anything out like that. They will still have my pillows and bed stuff they can sleep with though. My very clingy boys saw me packing today and it did not go well. They kept laying in the suitcase taking my shirts out and then laying on them they have not stopped following me around and calling for me. I put the suitcase standing up and they keep knocking it down and laying on it almost as if they are guarding it. 

Two days well really only one I will get home around 7 am and leave for work at 8pm then when I leave work that night I go straight to the airport. I can tell this isn't going to go well with my precious kitties. I really need some help on what to do! Oliver is already getting sick (he has herpes that flares up with stress), they are all getting extremely cuddly and they will not leave me a lone for anything. Packing isnt going well since they take my clothes out and keep stealing them. I have been trying to slowly pack so they can tell I am going to be leaving but I keep telling them I will be back in a few days. I have a very bad feeling about leaving them at home while I am 2000 miles a way. How can I help them? 

This is going to sound at little nutty: put three or four tshirts that you have worn but not yet washed in individual zip loc baggies. Give the baggies to your fiancé with instructions to leave them out in favorite sleeping places of the kitties in the middle of your trip. Leave items of clothing out in their favorite spots on the day of your departure. Your scent will calm them. The items in the baggies will retain your scent. Remind your fiancé to put them out as needed. I did this for my last last vacation and my cat sitter said my girl cuddled and slept with those shirts the entire time I was away.
If you do not already have a Feliway diffuser running, I would suggest getting one.
Try to keep their schedules as normal both in the next couple of days and while you are gone. That consistently will be helpful to them.
As hard as it is, the calmer you are, the calmer they are going to be. They are going to feed off your energy.
Make sure your fiancé knows what to do to treat Oliver's flare and anything else he needs to do. Make sure he has the vet's contact info and that he's expected to give you updates and photos and videos. Regular updates. He may not love cats but he loves you and he will take good care of them while you are away. You have to trust that in him [emoji]128522[/emoji]
I'm a wreck before I leave my girl who has had a history of crystals (which can be triggered by stress) so I understand your worry and anxiety about leaving. I really do.
I hope your trip goes well and that your babies do well in your absence. If I think of anything else I do pre-trip, I'll let you know!

@HelloMissKitty  unfortunately my female when she gets mad/upset she destroys my clothes only mine im not really sure why since I am the only person she likes but thanks to her my closet is already running a little low on clothes. Thankfully since I normally feed them when I get home from work around 7 its around the time he is leaving for work so I can just have him feed them, change litter, water ect before he goes to work. Hopefully he will since he isnt really interested in the cats I feel he will just do the minimum while I am away. I am trying to stay calm and I am giving them attention whenever they ask. unfortunately they are now thinking I am a bed and sleeping on me or my pillow while I am sleeping this is making sleeping difficult but when I am gone they will still have my pillow and bed stuff to sleep with. The worst part about it is the day after I get back having 5-7 people they dont know in the house for 9 days is going to make everything worse. I will be there though and my fiance so there are people they know but not the other 5-7 people. I am going to leave my pet credit card with my fiance in case anything happens he can get them taken care of without any worries. 

You also might want to let your vet know that you will be out of town should your fiancé need to take anyone in.

I've never tried this before but there is a product called Bachs Rescue Remedy that is supposed to have a calming effect when put in a pets water. There is a human version (which I can tell you words great!) and a pet version. I've seen the pet version at Whole Foods and pet stores.

With regard to your post trip company: can you set aside a kitty retreat room where only you, your fiancé and kitties are allowed? Like your bedroom? My cat is terrified of my mother, who lives 3,000 miles away so is not here often. One trip, my mom stayed with me and the stress precipitated a urinary crystal flare. For subsequent visits, I established my bedroom as a "safe room" for my cat: my mother was not allowed in there for even 5 minutes, I keep a fan running for low, white noise, keep the blinds closed, all meals were fed there etc. The white noise and darkened room was a suggestion from my vet as a way to reduce the sensory overload and stress in my cat. The whole idea has worked beautifully: if she wants to come out and be social, she can but if she needs to get away to a place she feels safe, then she has a place to go where only her scent and mind is.

I do have a gel type calming medicated stuff my vet gave me for when I know things will be extra stressful around the house the problem is he hates it and I dont think my fiance will fight him and get multiple bites to get him to eat it. I do already have the master bedroom blocked off just for them so they can retreat from the dog. They have the bedroom the walk in closet and most the time the bathroom as well just for them that no one is allowed in. The only problem we only have one working bathroom as my house is being remodeled so people will be walking in and out the bathroom it does have a separate door so no one needs to enter the master bedroom but they will be walking by the gate which the cats can see. My boys are very attached so I know they will be going in and out of the room as they please and my female will probably just stay up there which is fine they have a small cat tree up there toys food water liter boxes everything they need. I just hope people remember to keep both door closed to the bathroom or the dog will invade there space which completely freaks them out. I feel I wont see my female much for that 9 days but I think my boys will at least be curious and watch from a distance. 

You will at least have the calming gel for when you are home and have your visitors. I'm glad you have a room already set up for your babies during the visit. With regard to people remembering to keep the door shut: maybe put up a sign kindly reminding your guests to shut the door behind them? I don't think that's unreasonable. With the gate: is there any way to put something (cardboard even) in front of or behind the gate to act as a sight blocker? That would help reduce the external visual stimulation.
I hope your trip and visit goes ok [emoji]10084[/emoji]️

Do you have a friend that loves cats? Maybe have them come play with the cats a bit while you're gone. And even if he's not affectionate, your fiance could totally give them treats which always makes a cat like a person. Will he let them sit with him while he watches TV? Cats are so endearing that you might come home to find him a cat person, anyway.

And try not to be so stressed yourself. Don't feel guilty. Not only is it crappy for you, but the cats are probably picking up on your stress and that itself is making them freak out.

All my friends that are coming love animals and one especially love cats. I can defianly have them play with the cats I dont think my female will she wont even play if my fiance is in the room but my boys will. I have told him and I have a stack of treats and a bunch of stuff stocked up for him to give them and hopefully that helps. They wont come down to sit with him since the dog is out my Oliver will come and brave the dog (she just tries to play) and sit on my lap but I dont think he finds my fiance worth fighting past the dog. 

Today I finished packing since I work nights and only have time to come home say bye to the fiance grab my bag and head to the airport. They were very very very clingy to me. Tyson was giving me a death glare when I went down stairs after I got done packing. 

Hopefully they will be okay while I am gone they got a bunch of lovings and play time with me today. I even got Ellie to climb on my fiance while he pet her which is a first. Who knows he might bond with the cats while I am gone

I am very proud to say Oliver has done great I came back from vacation last night and his eyes are a tiny goopy but other than that he is amazing! I hope this week with all the people here he does just as good. I know my fiance did amazing with him and they actually bonded pretty well. Even ran to my fiance today when the dog was bothering him instead of me which is huge but of course he ran right over to me once the dog moved a little further away! He will always be a mama's boy 

I know a few weeks ago I was posting about how I was afraid about going on vacation and then having a house full of friends from out of town with my cats. My Oliver has herpes and I was sure he would have a major flare up. I am proud to say he has been completely fine! As far as I know he hasn't bit any of my friends which is huge for him and only had one scratch which wasn't his fault my sister was holding him on her lap and my friend turned on the air pump to fill up the air mattress and he got scared. My Ellie is very shy doesn't let anyone touch her other than me she will walk in a huge circle around my fiance to get to me so that she knows he wont try to touch her (but she is getting better), she normally hides when people come over so i thought other than when everyone went to bed and I had the cats in my room so they wouldn't bother anyone she would be hiding from everyone. After a few days of hiding she started to realize they were not going to hurt her and even came downstairs a few times just to check things out. She didn't let anyone touch her and when anyone tried to play with her she didn't move but she still came out of hiding to see people unless they got kind of loud which is huge for her! My oldest cat Tyson was his typical self and wanted to be the center of attention at all times he was great as usual. It was a total win for my little family no one got bit which normally happens on the daily, Oliver is still healthy and showing no signs of a flare up, Ellie came out of hiding a few times to see what everyone was up to and Tyson was himself.  I am so proud of my kitties I just needed to share how amazing they have done this week!!

 Sounds like they did an awesome job! I'm glad everything seems to have gone smoothly!

I'm so happy that Ellie, Tyson and Oliver made it through you being away and guests!! Sounds like you did an excellent job of preparing for your absence and your fiancé did a great job taking care of them [emoji]128522[/emoji]