At Wits End!! Cat Peeing Issues

cheekykitty33 · Jul 22, 2016

Hi people! So I made an account on here just for this problem that I really need help with, my cat Kiara keeps peeing outside the box. Sometimes she pees in the box and other times she won't.

Here is a little background: I live with my parents and we have 3 dogs and 4 cats. My cats get along with each other and the dogs for the most part, Kiara and one of my cats Missy, aren't too fond of one another but I don't see them staring down at one another or blocking the other etc, also they can sit next to each other and eat treats with no problems but if they happen to jump onto the same cat tree at the same time or if Missy is on the top and Kiara jumps up onto the top, Missy will hiss at her, and Kiara will jump down and go elsewhere.

I have researched a bunch on why cats pee out of the box and none of the reasons seem to fit my cat/situation.

-The main one is that it could be a medical issue, well I've taken this cat to the vet 4 - 5 times now, and she has had everything checked multiple times and there is nothing wrong with her.

-I tried 4 different types of litter boxes(lid, no lid, top entry, wide box with no lid)

-different litter box locations

-different types/brands of litter

-bought new mats incase it was the smell from the first time

-Vet suggested that maybe it was one of my other cats bothering her, which I considered, but she also used to stay in my room alllllll the time, I had a cat tree, litter box, and food/water so she really didn't have a reason to leave but she was in there what seemed like 24/7 and only on the cat tree. Maybe she left at night but I'm not sure and I normally sleep with my door closed so for the most part she was trapped in there at night too, unless I slept at my boyfriends. But even when she stayed in there, I'd still occasionally find pee in front of one of the boxes. And I also moved in with my boyfriend for about a year and took only 2 of my cats(They are litter mates and have been together their entire life), and Missy, the cat that Kiara doesn't get along with too well, stayed with my parents, and she still peed in front of the box.

-Vet suggested that maybe it was the dogs, because the litter box she does it in front of most often is on the middle level where the dogs normally are. except that I recently found out that she has been peeing on a rug in our upstairs laundry room. The dogs are rarely ever upstairs and if they are upstairs they are in my mom's office and not near the laundry room.

-I put a bowl of water in front of the other box, where she would pee, and that kept her from peeing there. But then she would pee next to the box, on the hard wood floor which is now ruined and will cost $1,000+ to fix. Which my dad is SUPER pissed about.

-She has been locked in my room for about a week or two now because my dad is furious that she has destroyed the hard wood in that spot and she ruined a few rugs and the floor underneath the carpet in a few spots. And for the first few days it seemed like she was only peeing in the box but then I found pee on the mat in front of the box. I removed the mat to clean it and then last night I found that she has been peeing on a bag of toys that I have been getting ready to donate.

I don't know what else to do for this cat. We have tried so many different things like changing the boxes and litters and different locations and separating her. I even had her on Xanax for awhile because I think she has stress or anxiety, but it did nothing to her except make her hate me and hiss anytime I looked at her.

My parents want this cat gone. and sadly, I'm starting to want her gone too.

If you guys have any ideas or theories please let me know.

Thank you! Sorry for long post.

cocobutterfly · Jul 22, 2016

First of all, hello and welcome! I'll get right into it...

Instead of moving around the litter box, have you tried adding more boxes around the house so she has more than one to choose from? Our cat started out with 4 litter boxes when we first adopted her. They were placed all over the house, all different types of box and litter in different locations and we let her choose her favorite before we started removing some of them. She flat out avoided some locations like the one in her room and the den.

The living situation that Kiara is in sounds like it might be stressful for her. Our cat gets anxious easily, and she's peed out of the box when she was stressed out. Many things can set her off - other cats coming into our yard, dogs, strangers coming into the house, car ride to the vet, fireworks, neighbors' AC units going off constantly in this hot weather, loudness and too much noise in general, etc. But the thing that upsets her the most is when there's a stressed out or angry person in the house. She knows and feels it before any human does. We as owners have to relax before our cats can relax. I don't care how many furniture or rugs our cat has destroyed, I will never stress myself out over it. Because once I stress out, the cat stresses out. Please try adding more boxes throughout the house, and put them down where she has peed. Also try different types of litter. Our cat hated and avoided certain kinds of litter.

I assure you, if Kiara is healthy and doesn't have any medical condition that causes incontinence, there's a solution. Please consider some options before thinking about rehoming your cat. She's a family member. All the other stuff can be bought and easily replaced with money.

red top rescue · Jul 22, 2016

The problem is that poor Kiara is on the bottom of the totem pole in your current situation, and the more you all are angry at her, the worse it gets. It isn't a medical issue, it's an emotional issue. Is this cat anyone's MOST LOVED animal in this house? Is she even maybe somebody's second favorite cat? Does she even have another ANIMAL in the house who is her good buddy and friend? Do any of the other cats lick her head, snuggle up beside her, or share their food with her if they are all eating together? Who loves Kiara? Who is she important to?

Finally, does she have a litter box to call her own, one that none of the other cats EVER use? Long story short, litter boxes usually represent ownership, which is one reason that the general rule is to have one more litter box than you have cats, and for them to be in separate areas (not grouped all together). Secondly, when a cat is on the very bottom of the totem pole in a multi-cat or multi-animal house, peeing in odd areas is not unusual. She probably LIKED having your room to herself, and she liked the cat tree because the elevation offers her safety. However, if the door to your room was ever open, one of the other cats (probably Missy) may have peed in Kiara's litter box, thus making it "not hers" anymore. She peed on the mat to make a statement, but you took that away. Then she peed on the toys. Or just anywhere. Cats pee on things to claim them, to mark their territory. Kiara doesn't really have a territory to call hers in your house, does she?

This isn't a problem that fixes itself quickly. What usually happens is that the humans get angry at the cat, and the cats act out more and more, and the humans get more angry and the relationship is broken, beyond fixing, so then the cat is either rehomed with an understanding person or thrown outside and made to be an outside cat, or dropped off at a shelter where she may or may not die of a broken heart before she gets adopted. Instead of seeing her predicament, being on the bottom of this 3-dog, 4-cat totem pole, you too are getting angry with her too. Cats know this. They are not dumb. They will become more and more secretive about where they are peeing, trying to become invisible, if they can't have a place to call their own. If she is hissing at you now, that's actually a sign of fear, probably not a result of the xanax. She feels the tension. She feels the lack of belonging. She knows you are starting to want her gone and she doesn't know any way to fix it. I feel extremely sad for her.

You have not mentioned the cat's ages, or if the other two besides these two girls are boys. Who came first, who came second, who came in third and who came in fourth? Obviously Missi is higher up the totem pole than Kiara, because Kiara is the one who backs down. And what about the dogs? I suspect they are near the top because I'm guessing your father is probably a dog guy.

I took in a cat like this once.. Her former owner had given away the only one in the house that loved her, her littermate brother. Until then, she was fine, but then the peeing outside the box started. She too was taken to the vet mutiple times, tranquilizers were tried, but her owner didn't love her anymore, and the more she peed outside the box, the worse the relationship got until the cat developed idiopathic cystitis, which is chronic bladder inflammation due to nerves, not a bacterial infection. The vets advised the woman to rehome the cat, for both their sakes, a lovely Ragdoll, and I took her into rescue to see if we could work out this problem. I gave her a room of her own (my study/rescue room) and I noticed she was declawed so I got her some sWheatScoop litter, because it's very soft on their paws, and I put that in one box and some Dr. Elsey's Cat Attract litter in another box on the other side of the room. (I found out later that the girl who had her had changed from sWheatScoop to just plain nonclumping clay litter because she had lost her job and didnt think she could afford extra for good litter, but I didn't know that at the time. I think this whole problem came about because of her losing her job. Anyhow, long story short, I spent lots of time in there because that's where I work on my laptop, and she was a super sweet cat and was thrilled to be loved again (she had started running away from her other owner who was always having tio give her pills etc.). The boxes were clean and they were hers and she used them. I would not have been angry if she hadn't./ I also put down a box with a puppy pee pad in it, which has worked for other cats, but she went right to the sWheat Scoop litter. She was a doll. After a month of having her with no accidents at all, I advertised her and ound her a wonderful home where she was going to be queen of it all. The woman was a grandmother about my age, who lived alone but near her kids and grandkids, and if the cat outlived her, they promised to keep the cat and love her. When I brought her over for the meet & greet, the woman called to her and the cat ran right over to her and jumped up on the couch with her. She was home and she knew it. Hopefully we will be able to help Kiara too, whether she stays with you or finds a home more suited to her personality. Our whole purpose here is to help the cats, and by helping the cats, we help the people too, so please tell us all you can about her personality and history so we can help. You can post a photo of Kiara also.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BTW, here is a picture of that cat I just told you about. Her name was McKenna. She had a lion cut when she came in September because she had been so badly matted, but by November when she went to her new home, it was growing out. She was a gorgeous and sweet kitty and I was glad to be able to help her find her place in the world. She went through a rough patch but her new owners adore her and she can do no wrong.

mckenna_110312.jpg

red top rescue
Jul 22, 2016

motu · Jul 22, 2016

The general rule is to have more litter boxes than cats. Watch the series "My cat from hell" and a lot of problems are addressed by having lots of litter boxes in different parts of the house. Also cleaning the litter is required. Its the sucky part of cat ownership - litter boxes and cleaning them.

Some health issues are related to the litter boxes too. Struvite crystals are associated with reduced number of litter boxes. (Outdoor cats do not get this problem).

cheekykitty33 · Jul 23, 2016

Red Top Rescue said:
The problem is that poor Kiara is on the bottom of the totem pole in your current situation, and the more you all are angry at her, the worse it gets. It isn't a medical issue, it's an emotional issue. Is this cat anyone's MOST LOVED animal in this house? Is she even maybe somebody's second favorite cat? Does she even have another ANIMAL in the house who is her good buddy and friend? Do any of the other cats lick her head, snuggle up beside her, or share their food with her if they are all eating together? Who loves Kiara? Who is she important to?

Finally, does she have a litter box to call her own, one that none of the other cats EVER use? Long story short, litter boxes usually represent ownership, which is one reason that the general rule is to have one more litter box than you have cats, and for them to be in separate areas (not grouped all together). Secondly, when a cat is on the very bottom of the totem pole in a multi-cat or multi-animal house, peeing in odd areas is not unusual. She probably LIKED having your room to herself, and she liked the cat tree because the elevation offers her safety. However, if the door to your room was ever open, one of the other cats (probably Missy) may have peed in Kiara's litter box, thus making it "not hers" anymore. She peed on the mat to make a statement, but you took that away. Then she peed on the toys. Or just anywhere. Cats pee on things to claim them, to mark their territory. Kiara doesn't really have a territory to call hers in your house, does she?

This isn't a problem that fixes itself quickly. What usually happens is that the humans get angry at the cat, and the cats act out more and more, and the humans get more angry and the relationship is broken, beyond fixing, so then the cat is either rehomed with an understanding person or thrown outside and made to be an outside cat, or dropped off at a shelter where she may or may not die of a broken heart before she gets adopted. Instead of seeing her predicament, being on the bottom of this 3-dog, 4-cat totem pole, you too are getting angry with her too. Cats know this. They are not dumb. They will become more and more secretive about where they are peeing, trying to become invisible, if they can't have a place to call their own. If she is hissing at you now, that's actually a sign of fear, probably not a result of the xanax. She feels the tension. She feels the lack of belonging. She knows you are starting to want her gone and she doesn't know any way to fix it. I feel extremely sad for her.

You have not mentioned the cat's ages, or if the other two besides these two girls are boys. Who came first, who came second, who came in third and who came in fourth? Obviously Missi is higher up the totem pole than Kiara, because Kiara is the one who backs down. And what about the dogs? I suspect they are near the top because I'm guessing your father is probably a dog guy.

I took in a cat like this once.. Her former owner had given away the only one in the house that loved her, her littermate brother. Until then, she was fine, but then the peeing outside the box started. She too was taken to the vet mutiple times, tranquilizers were tried, but her owner didn't love her anymore, and the more she peed outside the box, the worse the relationship got until the cat developed idiopathic cystitis, which is chronic bladder inflammation due to nerves, not a bacterial infection. The vets advised the woman to rehome the cat, for both their sakes, a lovely Ragdoll, and I took her into rescue to see if we could work out this problem. I gave her a room of her own (my study/rescue room) and I noticed she was declawed so I got her some sWheatScoop litter, because it's very soft on their paws, and I put that in one box and some Dr. Elsey's Cat Attract litter in another box on the other side of the room. (I found out later that the girl who had her had changed from sWheatScoop to just plain nonclumping clay litter because she had lost her job and didnt think she could afford extra for good litter, but I didn't know that at the time. I think this whole problem came about because of her losing her job. Anyhow, long story short, I spent lots of time in there because that's where I work on my laptop, and she was a super sweet cat and was thrilled to be loved again (she had started running away from her other owner who was always having tio give her pills etc.). The boxes were clean and they were hers and she used them. I would not have been angry if she hadn't./ I also put down a box with a puppy pee pad in it, which has worked for other cats, but she went right to the sWheat Scoop litter. She was a doll. After a month of having her with no accidents at all, I advertised her and ound her a wonderful home where she was going to be queen of it all. The woman was a grandmother about my age, who lived alone but near her kids and grandkids, and if the cat outlived her, they promised to keep the cat and love her. When I brought her over for the meet & greet, the woman called to her and the cat ran right over to her and jumped up on the couch with her. She was home and she knew it. Hopefully we will be able to help Kiara too, whether she stays with you or finds a home more suited to her personality. Our whole purpose here is to help the cats, and by helping the cats, we help the people too, so please tell us all you can about her personality and history so we can help. You can post a photo of Kiara also.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BTW, here is a picture of that cat I just told you about. Her name was McKenna. She had a lion cut when she came in September because she had been so badly matted, but by November when she went to her new home, it was growing out. She was a gorgeous and sweet kitty and I was glad to be able to help her find her place in the world. She went through a rough patch but her new owners adore her and she can do no wrong.

mckenna_110312.jpg

red top rescue

Jul 22, 2016

I think you're right. What you first said about Kiara being anyone's favorite made me realize that she really isn't anybody's favorite anymore. She's secluded herself a lot and now nobody bothers with her. which makes me really sad. I am definitely gonna try to get more litter boxes and I'm gonna get her a pheromone collar too just to help things. She actually used to be my favorite when she stayed in my room and would jump on my bed and hang out with me. She was also my dads favorite cuz she would follow him around in the morning. I think she definitely needs some love and something "Kiara". Thank you for your help and your story, I feel like there's a solution or hope now, when before I just felt angry and stressed out because I didn't know how to help her and my parents were freaking.

foxxycat · Jul 23, 2016

maybe you can try spending more time with her-sitting on the floor messing on your phone or homework or reading. just be in the moment. let her know you are calm. practice meditation and see if you can send vibes out to make her more comfortable.

Also maybe try some feliway. Its a plug in and heres a link about it http://www.feliway.com/us/Feliway/Feliway-Diffuser Sometimes this helps=it does take a couple of weeks to work BUT they do have a spray=you can spray down the beds and her tree with it before putting her on her tree. Spray yourself with it as well and see if it makes her stop running away. They have these at most vets offices and pet stores. I wonder if its at walmart but you can order on amazon too.

I really agree with the above statement about she is no one's favorite. This breaks my heart. I hope you can handle your dad and his moods=the cat is probably picking up on his anger. This is too bad. There are some people who don't think the way we do when it comes to problem solving.

so yes give us a bit of history-age=when she came to the house=when the other pets came to the house.

We can help solve the puzzle and figure out how to make her feel loved again.

also I don't know what litter you buy but make sure its UNSCENTED. They HATE perfumy type stuff.

I have really good luck with petco clumping litter. Then I also use the light weight unscented in that blue/green bottle. I also had a cat who hated clumping litter. she only wanted plain clay litter=she had long bushy hair and the particles would stick to the hairs on her bum when she squatted. So we buzzed her butt off AND changed litter. no more pooping outside the box. She was an outdoor kitty too and never peed in the house=even in the winter. That's just how she was=she came to me already an indoor/outdoor so I don't recommend making them an outdoor kitty for peeing and pooping issues. this just reinforces the feeling of not being loved and its just plain abandonment.

Take some pictures of the litter boxes and their placement=put them here-let us help you.

make sure you dump the litter every 2 weeks if its clumping and wash the box.

I use bath soap as its not harsh smelling. you don't want to use bleach or 409 type cleaners or Lysol. those chemicals are NOT safe for cats!

What I do=dump the litter in a trash bag=take box outside=fill with hose=put some bath soap in it to make suds. let it soak for awhile. I also have a crappy scraper I use to get the dried on clumps off. after it soaks=use a scraper or other object with a wash clothe and scrub the box. some cats are really fussy about smells left over. ESPECIALLY if someone else is peeing in there.

then dump it somewhere away from your walk way=I have a gully out back It gets tossed. the soap wont hurt anything. then rinse several times=dump the water out back away from the walkway so your dad doesn't get mad at having dirty litter water in his site.

then I just air dry it or I hold it in one hand and swing it back and forth=the air will dry it faster=then get some good unscented litter=and see if that helps.

I used to be bad about scrubbing out the caked on stuff until others helped me understand about smells=so I have a designated scraper and dishrag and bath soap bubbles type of cleaner where its not strong but also any soap will kill bacteria. It doesn't have to be harsh chemicals. If its really bad you can use dawn dish detergent but it takes a LONG time to rinse. So that bath soap I found made plenty of suds and the odor of soap wasn't over whelming. they never had a problem with it.

so show us some pictures and we will help you make her feel loved again-and you may find a part of yourself you didn't know you had. this will be your beginning journey on the joys of figuring out how cats click.

red top rescue · Jul 23, 2016

Maybe if you can share that insight with your Dad, tht might help too. Maybe you can make your room be her room for awhile, free of other cats. Since you said she has not been socializing, as she feels better, maybe she can, but if you keep the bedroom door closed to the other cats, maybe she will figure out that t is HER room and HER box, and you are her person again. She doesn't have to be everyone's favorite, but she does have to be loved, and to have a place to call her own. I look forward to hearing the answers to the questions about her history so we can understand her even better. I'm so glad you are going to work with her now. It may take time to stop the out-of-box behavior, but maybe it won't. I was lucky with little McKenna, she just bloomed by getting some love and a place of her own. I had a little boy who took a lot longer, and for him it required a feline friend, a little girl cat more timid than he was, to move in with him and live with him and along the way he discovered his mojo and started pooping in the litter box again. The two of them together changed from timid scaredy cats to bold hold-your-ground house felines, and they both sleep in bed with me and with the two senior cats who also share my bedroom (ages 14 and 17).

At Wits End!! Cat Peeing Issues

cheekykitty33

TCS Member

Thread starter

cocobutterfly

TCS Member

red top rescue

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mckenna_110312.jpg

motu

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cheekykitty33

TCS Member

Thread starter

mckenna_110312.jpg

foxxycat

TCS Member

red top rescue

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