Mother Still Outside - What Should I Do?

Alright, I'll have to visit amazon again and order some stuff. Not sure if she is longhaired. Her coat is like Felix's; 2.5 - 3" long but it lays flat. I had to buy a cat brush specifically for Felix's coat so she'll need the same. I also noticed a few bold looking spots on her yesterday. But the males were aggressive with her so could that be why?

My mother and I have been chasing the male cats away from her since we took the first kitten but some still tried to jump on her and she fought them off.

Update: I just got home with Hazel. She is absolutely terrified and is growling everytime I approach the cage. She also keeps jumping up at the top of the crate and is trying to get out.

What should I do?

Graceful-Lily said:

Update: I just got home with Hazel. She is absolutely terrified and is growling everytime I approach the cage. She also keeps jumping up at the top of the crate and is trying to get out.

What should I do?

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Did the vet give you instructions?  Is she in the trap or in a cage?  If in a cage how large is the cage?  Are you keeping it covered? 

I would leave her alone as long as the cage is covered.  She needs to remain calm.  I would let her go for quite awhile.  Offer her some food and then just let her be.

Did the vet give any pain meds?

They didn't really give me any instructions. She is in the cage and it is about 48" tall and 96" in length. It is covered. No, the vet did not give me any pain medication. Everytime I leave her, she atarts jumping around so I'm sitting next to her.

Graceful-Lily said:

They didn't really give me any instructions. She is in the cage and it is about 48" tall and 96" in length. It is covered. No, the vet did not give me any pain medication. Everytime I leave her, she atarts jumping around so I'm sitting next to her.

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If it calms her having you there then that is good.  Have you given her anything to eat?  Also is there a litter box in the cage?  That is one very large cage. 

She will calm down, but it may take some time.  For the first 48 hours you want to keep her in the cage and as calm as  possible because of the incision.  She should start to eat by tomorrow or at the latest Wed.  Be sure she has water too.  If she won't eat cat food, get creative.  Tuna, tuna juice, salmon, baby food, plain cooked chicken, sardines.  When cats are frightened they tend not to eat.  Yet, do not let her out of the cage as you need her confined so that the incision will heal.

You might want to get a radio or some music and play calming quiet music for her.  Classical music is great.  I often leave it one 24/7 with cats I have brought inside.

A feliway diffuser is also very helpful.

Try just talking with her and telling her she is safe. 

Yes, I've noticed that she stops panicking when a human comes close but she still growls. I have given her some food but she doesn't want it. It's an adjustable cage so I can play around with the size. There is a litter box but she hasn't gone in it. She's really sleepy and keeps drifting off. Is a night light okay at night time or should the room be completely dark? 

A night light is fine.  Just keep the cage covered with a sheet or towel.  She is still coming out of anesthesia.  She will be groggy and hopefully sleep well tonight.  She may not eat or use the litter box until tomorrow.  Be sure to offer her fresh food/water in the morning.  You might need to get creative to entice her to eat. 

Alright, thanks for the help.

But you'd never believe it! The vet estimated that Hazel is about 5 years old which would put her at the same age as Felix. She also has an identical coat pattern to Felix's and when my mother grabbed Felix from outside all those years ago, he had a sibling that was a Calico. And her owner didn't live far from me. I think Hazel is Felix's sister. And if she really is, that means Felix was a big uncle to his nephews these past 2 weeks. Ironically, Harvey got adopted by my brother who currently has Harvey's brother. So it all worked out great in the end! Felix got his sister back and Harvey got his brother back.

But how could I be sure that Hazel is Felix's sister?

Graceful-Lily said:

 
Alright, thanks for the help.

But you'd never believe it! The vet estimated that Hazel is about 5 years old which would put her at the same age as Felix. She also has an identical coat pattern to Felix's and when my mother grabbed Felix from outside all those years ago, he had a sibling that was a Calico. And her owner didn't live far from me. I think Hazel is Felix's sister. And if she really is, that means Felix was a big uncle to his nephews these past 2 weeks. Ironically, Harvey got adopted by my brother who currently has Harvey's brother. So it all worked out great in the end! Felix got his sister back and Harvey got his brother back.

But how could I be sure that Hazel is Felix's sister?

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How are things going today?  How is Hazel?

As far as knowing for sure if the cats are related, you would need to do a DNA test.   I believe you can order kits online but they are around $100 each.

Hazel is very upset. She didn't use the litter box for 2 whole days! Then I covered it with soil and she used it almost immediately. I ordered some raw meat for her so I should be getting that by Friday. When I say she's upset, I mean that she growls and hisses at me when I come close but I rub her cheek and she enjoys it so I'm a little confused.

Graceful-Lily said:

Hazel is very upset. She didn't use the litter box for 2 whole days! Then I covered it with soil and she used it almost immediately. I ordered some raw meat for her so I should be getting that by Friday. When I say she's upset, I mean that she growls and hisses at me when I come close but I rub her cheek and she enjoys it so I'm a little confused.

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This is to be expected.  She could still be sore from the spay.  Also she is confused in her surroundings.  Be careful giving her the raw meat.  Too much too soon will cause diarrhea. 

Hopefully soon, you can let her out of the cage so she can start to explore her room.

I've been giving her raw meat since I saw her eating birds outside so I think it'll be fine. Should I stop touching her then?

Graceful-Lily said:

I've been giving her raw meat since I saw her eating birds outside so I think it'll be fine. Should I stop touching her then?

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Ok she should be fine with the raw meat then.

I would keep touching her since she seems to like it.  If she becomes agitated by it, then stop, but you really want her to get used to the petting.  Have you been able to see her incision?  Hopefully it is healing well. 

No, I haven't been able to see them. She's laying on her stomach and every time she does lay on her side, she covers her stomach with her feet and tail.

Hazel attacked me a few minutes ago when I tried to feed her. She almost took out my eye. Mother says we'll have to put her back outside by weekend. And the volunteer at the cat rescue said she'll be happier outside since she's not enjoying human contact so much. She also peed all over my floor. I don't know what to do. I'm thinking that they're right.

I would be more inclined to let her out of the cage and into a room of her own that is cat proofed.  Before you let her outside you need to be sure the incision from the spay is healing and not infected.  She might be reacting since you are encroaching on her space. 

Yes, she will learn to adapt and survive outside, but she will always have to watch her back as well as defend herself from other cats and other predators.

Is there any way you can allow her out in a room of her own first and see if she settles.  It is so soon after her spay.  If she still reacts badly after having a room of her own then outside may be best.  Yet, she is truly not a feral cat.  She must have been owned at one time or she would never allow you to touch her.

I would be worried that she is in pain or that her incision is infected.  Please do not let her outside before checking this.

I know all of this can be very hard.  She is a stray cat that has developed some feral like tendencies.  Yet, she allows pets and she deserves a chance.  She may react better if she has space of her own and you are not threatening her by coming at her in a cage. 

If you must keep her in the cage, you might want to see if you can make a divider that would keep her away from you as you clean the litter box.

I would place an old shower curtain or puppy pee pads under the crate.  She is not peeing on your floor out of spite.  She is scared.  Also you want to be very certain she is ok after her spay. 

She truly seemed to be enjoying your human contact.  Yet this is not a few days ordeal.  It will take quite awhile for her to accept inside living.  It takes time, patience and lots and lots of patience.  If she were a true feral, she would be best off outside, but she is not a true feral.  She enjoys human contact from you and allows your pets.  Did you tell the rescue that you can pet her????

No, I didn't tell the rescue because I was afraid that they'd take her away from me. I want to give her a chance but everyone has turned their backs. I even asked politely if my I could get the spare room cleared out but no one wants to help me. And if I try to do it myself, I'll get yelled at so that's not an option. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I did something wrong. She looks exactly like Felix's mother so I am 100% sure that she is his sister. I know who use to own her too and I know she isn't feral. I'll see what I can do.

Thank you.

Graceful-Lily said:

No, I didn't tell the rescue because I was afraid that they'd take her away from me. I want to give her a chance but everyone has turned their backs. I even asked politely if my I could get the spare room cleared out but no one wants to help me. And if I try to do it myself, I'll get yelled at so that's not an option. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I did something wrong. She looks exactly like Felix's mother so I am 100% sure that she is his sister. I know who use to own her too and I know she isn't feral. I'll see what I can do.

Thank you.

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What about your room?  Can you place your bed directly on the floor and block off behind other furniture as well as keeping the other animals away?  It would be a start for her.  She deserves a loving home.  If you are honest with the rescue they might have someone who could foster her which could lead to a permanent home. 

You haven't done anything wrong.  You have done so many wonderful things for her.  She just needs time and love.  She may never be a loving lap kitty or a friendly greet you at the door cat.  You have know idea what she has been through in her 5 years of life.  My guess is that her life has not been easy. 

If you do not have a place for her, then I would contact the rescue and be very honest with them.  They might very well be able to help you.  Yet know that they are overwhelmed too.  Kitten season is upon us so they are swamped.  But it doesn't hurt to ask for help, you just have to be honest.

That's exactly why I lied to them. I felt bad because they're already overwhelmed with kittens and they even told me they didn't want her so I told them she was aggressive. :disa: It's a part of their program too; the mother is released back to the person who found her. They only want the kittens. I can't place the bed directly on the ground because there's nowhere to store the head piece. I don't want to give up on her, I just feel so much presure from everyone around me and I can't think straight. I do have a place for her. I'm finacially able to support another cat, I have space for her, and room in my heart.

Why wouldn't she be a lap cat?

None of my cats greet me at the door! :lol3:

Graceful-Lily said:

That's exactly why I lied to them. I felt bad because they're already overwhelmed with kittens and they even told me they didn't want her so I told them she was aggressive.

It's a part of their program too; the mother is released back to the person who found her. They only want the kittens. I can't place the bed directly on the ground because there's nowhere to store the head piece. I don't want to give up on her, I just feel so much presure from everyone around me and I can't think straight. I do have a place for her. I'm finacially able to support another cat, I have space for her, and room in my heart.

Why wouldn't she be a lap cat?

None of my cats greet me at the door!

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Hazel loves you. She's trying to heal and deal with all the sights, sounds and smells of being in a new place all at once. It's a lot for her to handle right now and she is scared. She knows that you love her but she is reacting the only way she knows how.

As @ShadowsRescue has mentioned, what this girl needs most is time, love  and more patience than you think you might have. You DO have it though. My Henry  was 8 when I got him from a local no kill shelter. He had been there from the age of 3 months. He had not been socialized. When I saw his picture on their website, I went and got him because I could not let him spend the rest of his life without knowing what it's like to be loved and in a home. He was VERY timid and stayed in his safe room by choice for 8 months. 7 of those months were with the door wide open and my 2 females, Lilith and Sophie and my dog Bailey visiting him (me too of course) regularly. Henry was never outside but I got my fair share of growls and hisses too at the beginning. Cats like ours are special. They need extra reassurance that they are loved, wanted and needed in the family.

If you have to leave her in the crate for now, I agree about dividing it so you can get to the litter box. Spend time with her. Talk to her quietly, tell her how you feel. Tell her you love her, that she is home now and that you want her to be happy. I firmly believe that they understand far more than what some people give them credit for. Sing to her, read to her, let her get used to having you close by but with her in her safe place. She has already shown that she enjoys being petted. she has not forgotten this. I have some baby books that I used to read to Henry that I got at a thrift store. I read them to him like he was a toddler. He has a very expressive face and he often looked at me like I was nuts but I could also tell that he enjoyed it.

Please don't give up on Hazel. She has not given up on you. She is just scared. You might want to try Feliway diffusers that plug in like those plug in air fresheners do. They give off the feel good pheremones that cats naturally have so many cats find them comforting. You are doing a wonderful thing. You can do this. We believe in you and we will help you in any any way we can.