Question of the Day, Sunday, May 22, 2016

micknsnicks2mom

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good afternoon! 


this past week has brought a pretty big change of focus for me. i don't particularly enjoy change, but deal with it as it happens. so now i'm getting used to having more free time -- not a bad thing at all! 


that got me thinking about how we all handle change. so for today's Question of the Day.........

Do you like change? and, How do you deal with changes in your life?

i live a very structured life, and really don't enjoy spontaneity. i think that's a big part of why i don't enjoy change in my life. life in general seems to have it's own plans for me, so i've learned to 'roll with the punches' and deal with the changes that come up.

i wouldn't have thought that it would be hard to get used to having more free time, but it has been for me. 
  on the bright side, i've been able to sleep more/catch up on my sleep, as well as enjoy some leisure time activities. 


how about you?
 

foxxycat

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I used to like changes. Then I grew up. Now I don't care for change. If something is going to change I like to ease my way into it.

I am a strange person who enjoys my own company. I used to love going out and about-now it fills me with fear.

I used to want to go on a cruise but the idea of making small talk with strangers-um NO!

So no I don't like change but on the other hand I feel stuck and bored but yet if I don't make changes in my life then its no ones fault. Most of the time I like having structure and knowing what is expected of me. I saw something mentioned about Asperger's that they don't like changes and often wondered if I inherited some of this from my dad. I tend to be a stickler for what happens at certain hours=like at work where we have break and lunch at predetermined times. At home I don't stick to a regiment of time. I eat when I am hungry.

My family is into making last minute changes or ask to get together with no warning-I cant stand that. I don't know why. When I was younger I didn't mind but now that I have my OWN place its liberating to set my own hours and decide no I don't want to visit and gently shut the door. Or not answer my facebook messages. I have no clue what my problem is. All I know is if I could order all groceries and hardware online I would. IF I never had to see another person it wouldn't bother me...now the cats-that's another story..love the cats..any cats.

So maybe if changes were slow and I had mapped out a way to navigate. I have lived here for many years and I don't want to move. I sometimes get frustrated with myself for not making changes I need to make...guess in the end I am just human. 
 

artiemom

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No, I do not like change. In fact, I am kind of scary of the unknown. I am trying to learn to accept things as they happen.

I have always been that way, and I do like to be in control of what happens to me. 

I am like you Foxxycat, as I enjoy my own company, yet, I really feel lonely at times; and I let a lot of little things get to me. I get upset at the little things. 

Again, I am trying to learn to be more accepting of things, and trying not to worry. I honestly feel I was born a worrier.
 

donutte

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Just working for the company I do, where change is the norm, I've kinda had to adapt to the fact it's going to happen, and will happen at different paces each time. Sometimes you have times to adjust, sometimes not.

So, I wouldn't say I like it, it just is what it is. I'm do better with change when there is time to adjust. Not a fan at all of sudden changes though (unless it were to involve me suddenly becoming wealthy, that is).

The one exception - when we bring new pets into the family. More often than not, it's been rather sudden. We had a few days notice with the kittens and the pooches and Pea-Pea, but more often than not, we got pets that just somehow came into our lives suddenly. Not to say there isn't an adjustment period for the whole household, but I'm ok with that kind of change.
 

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When I was working, I didn't like change for the sake of change. Every time a new  administrator came on board, everything was shuffled around so he or she could make the system his or her own. More often than not, there was no improvement. I couldn't see the point in it.

But the world changes, and I have to get used to it. I traded in my 17-year-old car for a 2015 one, and I'm overwhelmed. I will probably never use most of the gadgets on it.  It's just too hard.
 

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I hate change. I don't know why but I have always sensed when change was coming. It's this erry  feeling I get in the pit of my stomach. Whether its a good or bad change the feeling before hand is the same. Sort of like feeling a shifting. I know I sound crazy when I say it. 

Right now the problem for our house is summer break has started. And yes people on the spectrum likes set schedules. They love routine and deviating from it is not a good thing. Friday was my son's last day and he loves school. He has already asked to go to school tomorrow. God help me. 
 

denice

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When I was working, I didn't like change for the sake of change. Every time a new  administrator came on board, everything was shuffled around so he or she could make the system his or her own. More often than not, there was no improvement. I couldn't see the point in it.

But the world changes, and I have to get used to it. I traded in my 17-year-old car for a 2015 one, and I'm overwhelmed. I will probably never use most of the gadgets on it.  It's just too hard.
I am that way as well.  If I see the point than I am okay with it.  So often in the corporate world it is either change for the sake of change or changes dictated from higher up.  The higher ups are too far removed from the nuts and bolts of making things work.  I know it's silly and will not improve things but I have to deal with it.
 

Mamanyt1953

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I'm fine with change.  My Gran gave me my life's motto..."Bloom where you are planted."  I took it to heart, and as a result, am so adaptable that I sometimes don't make changes that I really should!  It isn't that I don't want change, but that I adjust so quickly to anything at all that it's hard not to be comfy where ever I am.  Once I DO decide to make a change, or one is thrust on me, I just...go with the flow, set down my roots in new soil, and bloom
 

Norachan

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I don't mind change at all. We moved around a lot when I was a kid. Lots of new homes, new friends, new schools or sometimes no school at all. As soon as we were old enough to get a passport of our own my brother, sister and I started travelling by ourselves. I guess we've all got wanderlust.



I'm going to be staying put for a while as I bought a house a few years ago and I have a lot of cats to look after now. I'm quite happy where I am, but I'm sure things will change again in the future.

That's fine by me. I like having something new to look forward to.
 

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The reason I like cats so much is because, like them. I HATE CHANGE! I like structure and constance in my life and feel comfortable knowing what is going to happen next. I have no desire to travel, although my husband does and I do enjoy new sights, but I worry the whole time what is happening with my 'herd ' back home since they show up to eat at 4 AM and NO ONE will come at that time to feed them. With all our raccoons we can't leave food out either. I'm going to have to find the time and plans for a raccoon proof feeding station and they are just going to have to eat hard food for a while if we ever go somewhere for more then overnight.  
 

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It doesn't bother me, unless it's too much at one time. Little things, minor changes are fine and you roll with the flow. It's OK. But sometimes, things have a way of really slapping you up along the head, just one thing after another after another and it just gets to be too much.
 

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It depends on what changes. Most of the time I just take life one day at the time and go with the flow.
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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I used to like changes. Then I grew up. Now I don't care for change. If something is going to change I like to ease my way into it.

I am a strange person who enjoys my own company. I used to love going out and about-now it fills me with fear.

I used to want to go on a cruise but the idea of making small talk with strangers-um NO!

So no I don't like change but on the other hand I feel stuck and bored but yet if I don't make changes in my life then its no ones fault. Most of the time I like having structure and knowing what is expected of me. I saw something mentioned about Asperger's that they don't like changes and often wondered if I inherited some of this from my dad. I tend to be a stickler for what happens at certain hours=like at work where we have break and lunch at predetermined times. At home I don't stick to a regiment of time. I eat when I am hungry.

My family is into making last minute changes or ask to get together with no warning-I cant stand that. I don't know why. When I was younger I didn't mind but now that I have my OWN place its liberating to set my own hours and decide no I don't want to visit and gently shut the door. Or not answer my facebook messages. I have no clue what my problem is. All I know is if I could order all groceries and hardware online I would. IF I never had to see another person it wouldn't bother me...now the cats-that's another story..love the cats..any cats.

So maybe if changes were slow and I had mapped out a way to navigate. I have lived here for many years and I don't want to move. I sometimes get frustrated with myself for not making changes I need to make...guess in the end I am just human. 
maybe it has something to do with youth, because i used to enjoy changes and 'going out and about' too -- in my youth. these days i feel i'm quite 'jaded' -- i think i've seen/experienced more than enough with people in general, in negative ways. i just have very little interest in socializing in real life any more. 


i totally agree! 
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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No, I do not like change. In fact, I am kind of scary of the unknown. I am trying to learn to accept things as they happen.

I have always been that way, and I do like to be in control of what happens to me. 

I am like you Foxxycat, as I enjoy my own company, yet, I really feel lonely at times; and I let a lot of little things get to me. I get upset at the little things. 

Again, I am trying to learn to be more accepting of things, and trying not to worry. I honestly feel I was born a worrier.
i used to be a worrier, but i've stopped worrying until there's something to worry about. and life seems always to provide things that cause me worry, but then i deal with the worry-causing things...and life provides the next worry. 
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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Just working for the company I do, where change is the norm, I've kinda had to adapt to the fact it's going to happen, and will happen at different paces each time. Sometimes you have times to adjust, sometimes not.

So, I wouldn't say I like it, it just is what it is. I'm do better with change when there is time to adjust. Not a fan at all of sudden changes though (unless it were to involve me suddenly becoming wealthy, that is).

The one exception - when we bring new pets into the family. More often than not, it's been rather sudden. We had a few days notice with the kittens and the pooches and Pea-Pea, but more often than not, we got pets that just somehow came into our lives suddenly. Not to say there isn't an adjustment period for the whole household, but I'm ok with that kind of change.
i think that's a positive way to look at change! 


awww...i like that 'one exception'! 
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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When I was working, I didn't like change for the sake of change. Every time a new  administrator came on board, everything was shuffled around so he or she could make the system his or her own. More often than not, there was no improvement. I couldn't see the point in it.

But the world changes, and I have to get used to it. I traded in my 17-year-old car for a 2015 one, and I'm overwhelmed. I will probably never use most of the gadgets on it.  It's just too hard.
ahhh, yes, kind of meaningless change.


hmmm...i think i'd start by deciding which gadgets i'd never need, and just 'write those off' of my mind.
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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I hate change. I don't know why but I have always sensed when change was coming. It's this erry  feeling I get in the pit of my stomach. Whether its a good or bad change the feeling before hand is the same. Sort of like feeling a shifting. I know I sound crazy when I say it. 

Right now the problem for our house is summer break has started. And yes people on the spectrum likes set schedules. They love routine and deviating from it is not a good thing. Friday was my son's last day and he loves school. He has already asked to go to school tomorrow. God help me. 
i believe i've said something along these lines before, that i don't necessarily believe in everything but i do very much believe in possibilities. so it doesn't sound crazy to me, that you sense when changes are coming. i believe that there's much more to this world than we 'mere mortals' (can) understand. 


would it be possible to find a summer program for your son to attend, one that he could go to every summer? it could be like school or like crafts, recreation, or activities. my thought being that though there would be a shift from school to the summer program, it could be the same shift every year? 
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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I am that way as well.  If I see the point than I am okay with it.  So often in the corporate world it is either change for the sake of change or changes dictated from higher up.  The higher ups are too far removed from the nuts and bolts of making things work.  I know it's silly and will not improve things but I have to deal with it.
 
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micknsnicks2mom

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I'm fine with change.  My Gran gave me my life's motto..."Bloom where you are planted."   I took it to heart, and as a result, am so adaptable that I sometimes don't make changes that I really should!  It isn't that I don't want change, but that I adjust so quickly to anything at all that it's hard not to be comfy where ever I am.  Once I DO decide to make a change, or one is thrust on me, I just...go with the flow, set down my roots in new soil, and bloom
i really like your Gran's motto! 
and a very good and positive way to deal with change too! 
 
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