Madison's about to leave

This may be too early for crossing the bridge - but I need encouraging words. I have never lost someone before. I'm 24 years old and Madison is my first pet. Her vet is discussing quality of life with us today and I know deep in my heart that her time is coming very soon. I don't know how to deal with death. I don't want to lose her. She's my baby. I need help and encouraging words of what's good for her.

I'm so sorry. This is one of the toughest things than can anyone can go through.

Is she ill?? I hope that the vet will be honest with you about her prognosis. Most are but the important thing is what's best for Madison. I hope that someone is going with you. Hold her tight and just keep reminding her how much you love her. She already knows this and she loves you just as much but it will be good for both of you to remind her.

Hang in there and feel free to vent here. We understand and we are here for you. 

Oh no! Hopefully the result at the vets is good, but if it's not, then know that she won't suffer for long. You clearly love her very much and her life has been a happy one so far, so think about that! Think about the fact that you gave her an amazing life, whether you got her from a breeder or shelter, she got a home. And may she live that happy life even longer!

Madison's ct scan shows that she has a tumor in her nose. They believe it's growing rapidly especially things escalated within a 3-week timeframe. Surgery would be very hard because of the size and location. Thanks berdcat & kat0121. I do love her very much and going to give her so much more love during her remaining days.

Spend all the time you can with Madison. This is such a tough experience to endure. Many of us here understand and are here to help you. The passing of one of my cats is what led me to this site and these folks have helped me more than they know.

Aw My best wishes to you. It's very good to hear that you will give her a great time. I'm assuming you are going with euthanasia. It may help you cope and help Madison feel more comfortable if it is done at home, instead of a surgically pristine office. I hope she enjoys your time together a lot.

BerbDCat said:

Aw My best wishes to you. It's very good to hear that you will give her a great time. I'm assuming you are going with euthanasia. It may help you cope and help Madison feel more comfortable if it is done at home, instead of a surgically pristine office. I hope she enjoys your time together a lot.

Click to expand...

I'm going to see if there's anything they can prescribe her to make her temporarily better until her body really can't take it. Idk if it's the humane thing to do?? Is it selfish? The vet thought she was a high risk before going in to do the CT scan due to anesthesia so I don't want to prolong the inevitable and allow her to suffer any longer.

Boney Girl Dad said:

Spend all the time you can with Madison. This is such a tough experience to endure. Many of us here understand and are here to help you. The passing of one of my cats is what led me to this site and these folks have helped me more than they know.

Click to expand...

This site has helped me through the process. My friends and family don't have pets so they minimize my feelings. Thank you.

ealyssa said:

I'm going to see if there's anything they can prescribe her to make her temporarily better until her body really can't take it. Idk if it's the humane thing to do?? Is it selfish? The vet thought she was a high risk before going in to do the CT scan due to anesthesia so I don't want to prolong the inevitable and allow her to suffer any longer.

Click to expand...

Talk to the vet. Ask them to be HONEST with you. Ask them what they would do if Madison was their cat. They may tell you that there is something they can do for her that would help but they might not. I know that you don't want to let go. The two of you have such a long history together and you share a very deep bond and special friendship. The vet may also tell you that it's in her best interest to let her cross the bridge peacefully. If this is the case, I would also ask if this can be performed at your home. it would be easier on everyone if the vet could do this for you. Many vets do. 

You have to go into this hoping for the best but preparing for the worst. Just remember that if it IS time that the bond that you and Madison share is unbreakable, unshakable and irreplaceable. Death can't touch it and knows better than to try. Madison will always love you just as much as you love her. She will hold you in her heart just like you will hold her in yours. When the day comes that you are reunited, it will be as though no time had passed at all and your friendship will pick right back up again. She will be just as happy to see you as you will be to see her. 

I'm sorry honey, I can't tell you what to do or what the outcome of this will be but we are here for you. Please feel free to shower her with hugs and kisses from us too.  

The choice is up to you. Being selfish isn't always a bad thing. And this isn't selfishness, this is personal;emotional. You have a right to hold on to what you love in life. My suggestion is this: follow your gut. If you think that it is ok to give Madison more time and that she won't suffer, then do that. She still deserves to live life to the full, in the most cat-ey way. However, you should know that if she does suffer, the pain for you will be worse, to see her like that. She deserves to live, but I wouldn't prolong her life to the point is no longer a happy one. If she must go, it should not be in pain, but in happiness

Madison is peacefully sleeping right now so I'm just enjoying a little cat nap with her.

Thank you kat0121 and berbdcat. You're both incredibly sweet and helpful. I appreciate your kind words and suggestions.

I'm always happy to help Madison is adorable! Thanks for sharing her picture

I'm sorry you have to go through this. I haven't had to yet so I don't know what to say. Madison is adorable. I'll be thinking about both of you!

I'm so sorry about your little one, @ealyssa.    I've had many pets growing up, and I just lost my first one as an adult, as you know. Many people said "you'll know when it's time." And I did. It was still a very difficult decision to make, but I always put his quality of life above everything else. Before I even let Sebastian go, I already knew the sweet boy I knew was gone. The deep, stabbing emotional pain of watching him suffer for even just a few moments was worse than the numbing, lingering pain I felt afterwards.

Enjoy every moment with Madison and give her lots of love. My thoughts are with you. 

Just continue to love and comfort her, you will know when she has had enough. Right now you must concentrate on quality of life, not quantity. She depends on you to not let her suffer needlessly. You might want to discuss with your vet the possibility to come to your house when the time comes as what was mentioned above , it is much less stressful on both of you.Depend on your vet for advise and guidance, they have seen much and have valuable experience in these matters.  I will pray for her to go peacefully in her sleep, it is as I would want for those I love. I. too. believe in that special 'bond' you develop over the years, she will always be near you, let the beautiful memories you have of her comfort you when you are afraid or sad, She loves you too much to have you so full of pain, she would want you to live your life to the fullest, and fill it with love and sunshine. just as you would want for her, My heart breaks for what you are going through, I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers.  I wish I could make everything better, but that is not possible in something like this, just know we are all here for you and will cry with you for what you are going through. Take care of yourself and please kiss Madison for me and tell her there are many who are thinking of her.  

Thank you everyone! I'm so grateful I found TCS. Everyone I've interacted with here has been so incredibly supportive and I can't even explain how much all of you kept me sane throughout this period.

I would talk with Madison's vet about what to do when the time comes... I'm sure you will know when it's upon you. For us, it's when the tumor completely disintegrates her spinal cord and she'll be paralyzed. I've looked up signs of a cat approaching death and it mentions how they won't really move, won't eat, won't groom, and so on.

One amazing person on this site is documenting / blogging her cat's bittersweet journey to the rainbow bridge and I thought that was such a great idea. I can use it like a memory book and as I write it, it helps me process all of my feelings.

You're in control of Madison's remaining time so fill it with love. This isn't easy, but we care and are here for you.

What a beautiful girl, I am so sorry that she is so sick 

I am so sorry you are going through this, as I was there not too long ago. As @GoHolistic  said, you will know when it's time. I wondered about that too, & did know when the time came. 

My Angel had lymphoma, & he went through chemo to treat it. It was working at first, & very encouraging. Then, about halfway in, it just started spreading. It was very discouraging. 

I did everything I could (including a feeding tube that last week, hoping to turn things around)  to save him, & he fought just as hard until the end.  He was just looking so bad that last week, (hiding out in the bathroom)

I had already been telling him everything I wanted to, so nothing was unsaid.

I was hoping for more time, but the night before, I picked him up to come lay on the bed with me, & get some cuddle time, & when I heard his breathing in my ear,  I just knew.

(his lymph nodes in his throat has swollen up). He was getting air in, but it just sounded like a push to get it out. At that moment, as much as it broke my heart, I knew.  It was late, but  I called my mom, & emailed the vet.

My mom picked us up the next morning. 

It is really hard, It's the first time I had been through that as well, so I do understand, like many here. I am sorry you are faced with this. I am glad you at least have the support of friends. 

Please make sure you have someone with you, when the time comes. My mom stayed with me that night. 

I'm not sure if @Inanna  was speaking of me, but I kept daily logs of Angel since his diagnosis. I did it in Google Docs. It made it easy to keep track of how much food he was eating, litter box visits, & ALL the meds, times & dose given, etc... This way, I also sent a link to his vet, & she could read it anytime for an update to see how he was doing. She was so great though, she often emailed me. 

Saying a prayer for the both of you!    

Kelly

My heart breaks for you. We just lost our Tony on Jan. 18 at the age of 15. We've lost other cats in the past who we loved dearly, but I have to admit that my Tony was THE most special one of all. He was so sweet, gentle and didn't have a mean bone in his big 14 lb. body. Our vet kept him going for 10 mos., after he was diagnosed with an auto immune blood problem. All the time his heart was strong and the antibiotics gave him an appetite and good life, but the last bout I knew was the end. His heart was weak and he was "cold". It was time! I still cry when I think of him, as does my husband. It's never easy, but we give our babies the best life possible. Surprisingly, a couple of mos after we lost Tony we found a tiny Russian Blue kitten on a local cat rescue website. I fell in love with his face, went to visit him at his foster home (he and his brother had been found in the foster's back yard). Little Charlie h as now been with us since Feb. and he has taken some of the hurt away from losing our Tony. We feel it was Tony's gift to us from Rainbow Bridge. You and your vet will know when the time has come. Please know that all of us at TCS feel your pain and cry for you. Let us know what is happening and give your baby all the love possible.