heartbroken

My heart goes out to everyone who has lost their special friend. I had to put my beautiful boy to sleep almost 3 wks ago, and i cannot get over the pain of losing him. Every time i enter a room i think where he should be sitting, sleeping, or playing. It breaks my heart that he is no longer around to greet me when i get home from work, or sit with me. And even more so when no one understands because it's ' just a cat.' At least i know that everyone here understands and really cares.

Give yourself plenty of time to grieve for your loss and ignore anyone who tries to tell you it was only a cat or to hurry up and get over it.  We are here for you.

An amazing number of members find this site while looking for someone who understands their grief.

Sharing your grief is good. So is sharing your cat's story. The one about his life that made him so special.

ANYONE who gives love back, loves us unconditionally, and gives us such joy in our lives deserves to be mourned when they leave us, and the one that is left behind deserves to receive comfort and support, no matter what gender, race, or species. Anyone who says to get over it, or it's just a cat, is to be pitied, they have never received unconditional love, or had to earn the respect of that gorgeous creature called a cat. They don't know what it is like, and until they do they will never understand. That is why you must surround yourself with people who love you and respect your feelings enough to support you in your time of need. Everyone on this site understands your needs, almost all of us have lost our little ones, and the ones who haven't love cats enough to understand the pain of others who have. Three weeks is not long at all to mourn, I still cry three years later.

The bond you have will be with you always, your little one is safe in your loving heart. His precious memories will one day comfort you when you realize that he will always be near to ease your pain. The loneliness is at times unbearable, it leaves a huge hole in our hearts and our homes that only time can heal. We can't change the past, but we can plan for the future by living for today and holding on to the legacy of love your boy left for you. He would never want to be the cause of your pain, he loves you too much and wants only happiness in your world, and for you to celebrate knowing him and having him in your life for the time you did. Try to keep busy, I want you to know you are not alone in your grief, we will share your burden and cry with you, take care...............

We understand and are here for you.

I am so sorry for your loss, what was your kitty's name?

Thankyou all so much for your kindness. His name was wurzel, and he turned up at our house 4 1/2 yrs ago and filled our hearts with joy. As you all know, all kitties are special in their own way, and wurzel had so much personality. He was a little monster too! Sadly, he was unwell. You never know what health problems come along with a stray. I have since adopted two new kitties from a cat shelter to cheer me up a bit. Thanks again x

No matter how great the grief. One cat leads to another. What a beautiful little cat. And you can see the stinker in his eyes.

Hello, friend.

You have come to the right place. People here understand the depth of your loss an will stand with you to provide comfort. Non-cat folks just don't "get it," but we do.

I just lost my companion as well. He looks much like your guy! People here have been supremely kind.

It is said that time heals. Not sure if we ever completely heal from our losses, but time will ease pain, and bring perspective.

It is Ok to grieve in your way, and in your time.

My heart goes out to you today.

You do not walk alone.

Sending love and thoughts of peace and understanding,

Kate

Thank you all once again for your lovely messages. It means a lot to me. May we all celebrate the lives and fond memories of our furry friends.

I'm so sorry for the loss of Wurzel- that is such a sweet picture - what a handsome little man he was.  It makes me so sad when some people say things like, "it's just a cat" or "get over it", especially when it's family members :-(  But you don't have to worry about that here, we all get it and you are never alone. 

Fly free Wurzel and land softly- you were so loved

Wurzel, what a handsome gentleman.  I am so sorry for your loss.  Bless you for adopting the shelter kitties.       

Just had to bury our boy. We didn't have his grave ready, so our vet took him back to the clinic and put him in storage. She just got back from a holiday, so we went and picked him up. This isn't getting much easier over time. My husband buried wurzel up the side of our house, where he will be making a fern garden in memory of him. Also a cat run for our new kitties. I decorated his grave, and placed red roses on top. We love gardening, but now the garden is such a sad place. We miss him so much. I have read many posts on this site, and know we are all suffering together. It's just so hard.

It IS so hard. Some people think we lost "only" a pet. What some people don't realize that for a few of us, losing a pet is harder than losing a human.

How could this be?

For me, it's harder because of the innocence of our beloved kitty, and because their love is unconditional--as is our love for them.

Every human we love comes with the baggage of unmet expectations: "I love you, but I sure remember that time you left me waiting in the airport for three hours," or whatever our disappointment has been.

We don't have that with our fur-children. Their love is pure; consequently, we are able to offer them pure love in return. Their love brings out the best of us.

Also, humans (unless they are children), have some cognizance of death: we know it's coming someday.

Animals don't have that foreshadowing, which is probably a great blessing for them, and even for us. But it is bittersweet: they don't know of death. They have no preparation to leave us.

For me, it's difficult, because the whole "Rainbow Bridge" premise doesn't fit my personal paradigm. But I did see a YouTube today, a monologue and a song performed by an athiest who had lost his dog, and it helped me.

His song was entitled "Small Consolation," and he opined that the one thing he could feel thankful for was that his beloved pet was not missing him, as the man remained devastated and bereft.

His dog had gone on, and was not pining nor waiting for him. His dog was free of that loss and longing we feel, and was truly free.

Even though Heaven is a concept that doesn't work in my mind, I do feel that consciousness cannot be erased or destroyed. And I think it's entirely possible our consciousnesses will mingle when we both are shed from our physical shells.

Maybe not so different a concept from "Rainbow Bridge,"after all!

It WILL get better--you know that intellectually. But it's hard to feel that in the midst of our deep grief.

But it WILL get better...and until that time, please be good to yourselves.

I know I have been neglecting my own well-being during my time of grief, but it serves no one to not eat, not sleep, and weep constantly.

Today I decided to try to live again...and a lovely thing occurred.

I live in Thailand, in Chiang Mai, in the ancient Old City. I am surrounded by incredible, centuries-old Buddhist temples. But right next door to my home is a large Christian church.

I woke up this morning after fitful rest, and had no idea what time it was. But I heard birds singing, so I knew it must be daybreak.

I got up and went to my balcony, and I was greeted by the singing of perhaps 100 children at the church, celebrating sunrise Easter services.

Now, I don't think anything supernatural happened in waking to this sweet chorus, but I was comforted by the voices of the children and their songs (I presume--my Thai is terrible!) of death and resurrection.

The whole "he is risen" thing is outside my ken, yet I found deep comfort in the Christian faith of others today.

So, dear friends, take comfort where you find it. It may arrive in unexpected ways.

Know you are not alone, and I think I speak for all of us here: we share your loss, and we love you.

Kate

I'm very sorry for your loss of Wurzel. Anybody who says "it was just a cat" has never truly experienced the companionship a pet can give.

Thankyou, that's so true. Unconditional love is one of the things that makes our furry friends so special.