Need advice on keeping feral cat inside

I am new here, and I'm sure this topic has been covered within the depths of this forum 1000-fold. Meet 'Little Mao' also known as 'His Meowjesty, Arthur, King of the Kittens'. Little Mao has been hanging around my apartment complex ever since I moved here back in September. It has only been over the past 2 months that Little Mao has been greeting me like clockwork on the stairs and corridor (which are outside) leading to my apartment when I leave and come home from work. I've never fed the cat and it appeared to just want attention from me and also my wife. The apartment complex parking lot is full of like 8 other stray or feral cats. I was told people just dump them off there. A lady who lives a floor below me feeds them by her car.

Long story short, I decided to take Little Mao in. I let him come in only on his own terms and he quickly took to allowing us to pet him indoors. Here is a photo of him on his first or second day being allowed inside:

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I was told by the apartment complex staff that he has lived his entire life outside (I have some reservations about that as he is way too friendly and trusting), and I'm guessing he is like 3 or 4 years old. His left ear is clipped (as you can see in the photo) indicating that he has been neutered. Since last week we have been keeping him inside, or at least trying to. He even took to using the litter box immediately. He has several toys. The first night he meowed all night because we wouldn't let him out. Now he doesn't do that except for less than a minute at bed time, and when we wake up...possibly due to the plugging in of a Feliway diffuser and the implementation of a dry food feeder. At times he has a tendency to pace around the apartment and go to the door and just stare at it. We try to distract him with play, and eventually he forgets about it and lays in his bed under the coffee table for an hour or two before repeating the process. He spends 90% of his day in his cat bed.

We've been less than resilient with dealing with his begging to go outside...and tend to let him out at least once a day, either in the morning (when he likes bolts out the door as I leave for work) or in the evening about 2 hours before lights out. Every time he comes back within a couple hours wanting back inside (my wife usually is just waking up when it is time to let him in). That being said, the whole going outside thing has to end, as he runs the risk of catching diseases/viruses from the other cats, getting hit by a car, or hurting himself another way.

My question is, how do you get him to stop wanting to go outside? Am I being cruel by keeping him prisoner in the apartment? Should I have him go cold turkey? Would forcing him to stay inside only serve to give him kitty Stockholm Syndrome? We've only left him in the apartment alone for a couple hours at most, and like him, we feel like we're becoming prisoners in our apartment trying to make sure he is alright.

Any help or advice would be appreciated...we're what some would consider as dog people but I grew up with cats (that acted like dogs), so this seems very taxing and vexing to me, having to deal with a feral cat.

Thanks

Welcome to the forums.  Your sweet one is obviously a stray, but it appears someone took the time to neuter him thus the clipped ear.  That is definitely a plus.

In order to keep him inside full time (which is absolutely the safest place for him), you need to cold turkey stop allowing him outside.  It will be difficult, but you will need to be diligent about making sure he doesn't escape out the door.  Also watch closely for any open windows or screens he might push open.  Feliway will help.  You can also try some Composure calming treats or  Composure liquid.  This might help him to calm.  The outside has been him home for awhile so he is used to it.  He can adjust to indoor living only.  Try providing a bird feeder or a window perch for him to look outside ( windows closed).

You also could get a pet tent to safely take him outside when you are there or harness train him.  He will still be safe.

Also you didn't mention if he has been to the vet yet.  A vet visit is a must.  He will need a thorough exam, vaccines and wormed.  You want to be sure he doesn't carry any feline illnesses.

Thank you for caring and loving this sweet one.

A trip to the vet is within our immediate future. Since we've only had him for a week, I have held off taking him to the vet until he trusts us a bit more and gets comfortable with the carrier. I get the feeling he will not enjoy being trapped in a carrier, going in a car, and then into a room with a stranger and other strange animals around. I hear spraying Feliway on a blanket in the carrier will help him feel more comfortable with it.

Thanks for the advice. Cold turkey tough love and calming treats for his meowjesty.

Update on Little Mao. We have successfully kept him indoors - went cold turkey on keeping him inside. He no longer asks to go outside after 5 days. It appears he'd beg to go outside for want of using the bathroom but now doesn't hesitate to use litter box. Have had no issues with him using anything other than litter box.

Here is the little guy earlier today:

Next step: vet. Thanks for the help.

Yay!  Little Mao knows a good thing when he sees it.

Let us know how he goes at the vet.

Such good news!!  I am glad he is adjusting well.  Best wishes on a successful vet visit.