Need Advice... Adoptable?

Hello everyone, I am feeling extremely overwholved and Would love to get some advice.

Our outdoor cat Blackie had kittens two years ago in the woods- one boy & one girl. We didn't handle them as kittens but fed them everyday when she brought them to us. They got used to us and would brush up to us/ let us pet them as time went on.

The mom cat wants nothing to do with them now and beats up her daughter, a tiny little girl. She stays hidden in the woods, comes to the house to eat once a day & eats looking over her shoulder every 5 seconds. It's so sad to see.

We brought the mom in the house & kept her in one room of our finished basement. She totally loves it and gets along with our cat upstairs & we will eventually move her upstairs when introduced to our big dog.

Since it's the winter we trapped her two children to get neutered and have them in the house as well. The female will be going in two weeks and the male next week. They eat but don't seem excited to be in the house. If you sit down and talk they will Come out if they feel like it and let you pet them. Besides that, they lay in their beds all day and don't want to play with toys.

Do you think they can be adopted? I don't know what to do with them as they aren't that friendly and I don't know how they react with other people. They get a little taken back with eye contact but they will never hiss & they do let you pet them. They obviously can't stay in our basement their whole lives and I would like to do what's best for them. Should I contact rescue groups? Is there a way they could monitor them to see if they are even close to being adoptable? This has been a crazy time for us!!

Thank you so much for reading this super long post! The kitties thank you too!

OrangePoe said:

Hello everyone, I am feeling extremely overwholved and Would love to get some advice.

Our outdoor cat Blackie had kittens two years ago in the woods- one boy & one girl. We didn't handle them as kittens but fed them everyday when she brought them to us. They got used to us and would brush up to us/ let us pet them as time went on.

The mom cat wants nothing to do with them now and beats up her daughter, a tiny little girl. She stays hidden in the woods, comes to the house to eat once a day & eats looking over her shoulder every 5 seconds. It's so sad to see.

We brought the mom in the house & kept her in one room of our finished basement. She totally loves it and gets along with our cat upstairs & we will eventually move her upstairs when introduced to our big dog.

Since it's the winter we trapped her two children to get neutered and have them in the house as well. The female will be going in two weeks and the male next week. They eat but don't seem excited to be in the house. If you sit down and talk they will Come out if they feel like it and let you pet them. Besides that, they lay in their beds all day and don't want to play with toys.

Do you think they can be adopted? I don't know what to do with them as they aren't that friendly and I don't know how they react with other people. They get a little taken back with eye contact but they will never hiss & they do let you pet them. They obviously can't stay in our basement their whole lives and I would like to do what's best for them. Should I contact rescue groups? Is there a way they could monitor them to see if they are even close to being adoptable? This has been a crazy time for us!!

Thank you so much for reading this super long post! The kitties thank you too!

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I will later on, if you dont get enough with good answers before...Im although optimistic, even if you apparently must put in some work here.  Love Im sure you do have and are giving.

But the shy and feral mom, it seems its going nicely forward with her?  She does accept to be inside, etc?   Swell!

We have two indoor cats who were kittens exactly as you describe.  They were six months old when we brought them in and, knowing nothing about feral cats, we pretty much did everything wrong.

But once they were spayed and neutered, things started going better.  I took a year but they each became friendlier and more social.  One is a tortie, though, and because she hates our other cats, she has her own room.  But she loves to be petted and brushed now and we visit her frequently (her room is our office, so computer time also means Teresa time).  She's probably the most social of our cats, even though she only likes humans!

Her brother is the cat in my avatar.  He will allow head scritches and but scratches but won't be picked up.  But he is the sweetest of our cats and talks to us regularly about his day.

Hang in there.  They will adjust.

OrangePoe said:

Hello everyone, I am feeling extremely overwholved and Would love to get some advice.

Our outdoor cat Blackie had kittens two years ago in the woods- one boy & one girl. We didn't handle them as kittens but fed them everyday when she brought them to us. They got used to us and would brush up to us/ let us pet them as time went on.

The mom cat wants nothing to do with them now and beats up her daughter, a tiny little girl. She stays hidden in the woods, comes to the house to eat once a day & eats looking over her shoulder every 5 seconds. It's so sad to see.

We brought the mom in the house & kept her in one room of our finished basement. She totally loves it and gets along with our cat upstairs & we will eventually move her upstairs when introduced to our big dog.

Since it's the winter we trapped her two children to get neutered and have them in the house as well. The female will be going in two weeks and the male next week. They eat but don't seem excited to be in the house. If you sit down and talk they will Come out if they feel like it and let you pet them. Besides that, they lay in their beds all day and don't want to play with toys.

Do you think they can be adopted? I don't know what to do with them as they aren't that friendly and I don't know how they react with other people. They get a little taken back with eye contact but they will never hiss & they do let you pet them. They obviously can't stay in our basement their whole lives and I would like to do what's best for them. Should I contact rescue groups? Is there a way they could monitor them to see if they are even close to being adoptable? This has been a crazy time for us!!

Thank you so much for reading this super long post! The kitties thank you too!

Click to expand...

Re your question.  In this moment, they arent adoptable.  Unless you manage to find someone who is wanting and willing to do the fostering herself.

Ah, the new owner will probably anyways need to do some refostering, as the owner will be new for them.  but once done in full, next time it will be much easier.

So they are two years now, unneutered?   Everything will be easier after the neutering / spaying.  Not least, its fully possible mom and dau will accept to  coexist peacefully.  Two fertile cats, do sometimes cooperate, but thye can alos choose to be enemies, as the mom did here.   After the neutering there will be an entirely new chapter.   IF you wish to try this.

Otherwise, just proceed with the socializing.   And by all means, do contact these rescue groups - if nothing else, you can perhaps change info and advices with each others.  They are perahsp good at finding adoption homes - or you are.....

OK, some futher remarks.  If they come from their hidey when YOU are there, and let you pet them, not hissing at you, I think they feel unsecure there, but you are their safety.  Which is very good and encouraging for you.  The most common is the vice versa...

Be sure you are often with them. Perhaps even one and one. Talk with them, make friendly noises.  This is natural language for cats - compare with what a friendly tom is doing when courting, and what a territorial, domiant tom is doing - whom just takes what he wants...   As you notice, dont look in their eyes, look a little aside. You may also blink slowly.

Yawn broadly, and standing on all four, strech yourself forwards and backwards.  Its friendly greetings among cats.  So the "lazy cat" is usually  a greeting cat...

I notice, they seems to be a little anxious, feeling only decently secure when you are there.  Do you see any reason for this?  Smells, sounds??

Work with this, giving them as much feeling of security and safety.  Its like with human pupils. Being stressed and anxious, the deep learning doesnt work optimally.

You can also try with a Feliway diffuser in the room - or a Feliway spray as soon you shall do something new.   Try also with relaxing music.  Classical harp music is best, they say, but almost any calming, relaxing music may work.

Even cat purrs from youtube.  Hey, there is a mobile cellphone app, which can make purring sounds...

Being there, try to keep low. Sit down on a low chair or even on the floor.  Perhaps work with the computer. Or lay down / sit down, and read.  Either you read aloud, or quite for yourself....  Take a nap...

You tell you dont have difficult to pet them.  Shy cats are often easier to pet, if they lay comfortably a litte up, say on a sofa or a chair.  And you standing on knees, can then pet them almost as long as you want...  Of course, if notice they got enough, you end with this.

The same with trying to carry them.  Many shy cats dont like it, so carry them just a short moment, till you notice they wants down...

There IS a technique of force fostering, by wrapping in a towel, and carying even up to a whole hour at your chest.  This may be tried here too although it works best with kittens...  But its not necessary, you seems nicely on your way.

If you wish, I or Catwoman707 will describe it more deeply (this technique has been nicely reinforced by Catwoman, and I did buyed it wholesale).

Last not least.  Fostering takes usually time.  Even if you did a nice  beginning by being their food source and protector when  they were homeless.

Time, love, effort...   Sometimes you are lucky and it goes rather quick. But count on time and some effort.  Im sure you do have love more than enough.  

Good luck!

Thank you for your responses!

The mom cat is a sweet angel and let's you do anything. She loves attention, belly rubs and doesn't mind being picked up.

Is it wrong for the two to go back outside for the spring? They had heated hours and a heater in my garage when they were outside. I can't bring them upstairs as I already have 3 cats and it's already chaotic. I feel bad having them live in the basement when they could be outdoors.

OrangePoe said:

Thank you for your responses!

The mom cat is a sweet angel and let's you do anything. She loves attention, belly rubs and doesn't mind being picked up.

Is it wrong for the two to go back outside for the spring? They had heated hours and a heater in my garage when they were outside. I can't bring them upstairs as I already have 3 cats and it's already chaotic. I feel bad having them live in the basement when they could be outdoors.

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Wrong and wrong.  They are used to live and manage outside.  After spaying done, they will manage as your outside kitties, or even on their own.  Especielly as the dau got an enemy in her mom, and mom is now inside.  so its no real sin  to let them out again.   Essentially, you are doing an TNR.

While it would be a heavy sin to abandon a home cat to manage self outside.

But it will lbe much more difficult to foster and socialize them when they are outside.  The easiest and safest way to socialize, is to have them inside.  Also, after spaying of them all, the animosity mom to dau will prob end.  If they become pals again, you can use your cuddling and friendship with mom as an asset in fostering of them.  Cats do learn from each other, esp if the other cat is a pal to them.    So its often possible to use a friendly resident, or the most daring of the fosterlings, as the positive example, as an ambassadeur.

But if its too much animals for you, so its too much. You must yourself analyse and solve your situation.  Perhaps contact these rescue groups which you mentioned, and discuss with them before you do anything drastical.

I myself think they are after all good candidates for fostering, even if they are no longer kittens nor even really young.

It will be hard to make an informed decision until after they're neutered and spayed and you can see whether or not they can settle into being indoor cats, and whether or not they'll get along with their mother.  It takes about a month after the spay/neuter for the hormones to settle down, so you may not see any differences for a month afterwards.  I wouldn't let the male out after the neuter for another month after the surgery anyway. I've read that some sperm remains in the neutered male for up to a month after the surgery, so technically he can impregnate a female.  Feral males who are TNR'd are generally released a day or two after the surgery because they're difficult to keep confined indoors and are not adoptable, but it sounds like your cats are tolerating being indoors now.  So give it some time. It's also possible they may want to be indoor/outdoor cats. As they get older and better socialized, though, they may prefer to be indoors only. I can only share from my experience that it's much less stressful having indoor only cats--so much less to worry about! So wait until after you have them fixed and see how things unfold.  The ideal would be for them to all remain inside, or do what I do with one of my formerly outdoor cats and take them out for walks on a harness and lead.