New kitten and boundaries problem...

I have a 11 week old Russian Blue Kola, who has been with me for just over 2 week now. I work during the days but I spend time with him before and after work everyday. My housemate also comes to play with him a little most days too. He has lots of variety of toys and a great cat tree by the window.

Generally he's a very sweet boy and I haven't had major issues bar one that seems to be developing. I've never had a pet before and so need some advice please!

Now the situation is that I live in a studio type room and my mattress is on the floor. We had bit of of flea/mite problem so I washed his bed which was dry clean onlyso it got ruined and he hasn't had a official bed for a week or so now.

I've ordered a new one but it's gonna take some time to arrive. He sleeps on his cat tree and my desk chair when I'm not home and at night when I settle for bed, he usually settles in with me. Up to now this wasn't really disturbing my sleep and he was being really good.

Now the problem is that I haven't obviously set a few boundaries and even though I've been trying to in past few nights it's only confusing him and not really working.

The issue is that he's started to wake up & start with his new obsession of chasing his tail all over my bed at God knows what hour, continuously. I read somewhere before I got Kola for when a kitten disturbs you on the bed to swiftly and gently swipe him off the bed and then lay dead. Now I've been doing this but he seems to think this is play and will bite and play rough even more.

After a few times of doing that he will eventually go across the room to play but sure enough he'll be back soon. On top of which he's getting seriously too comfortable and biting me as "play". As I lay in bed currently typing this up on my iPhone he keeps jumping at my phone and hands to bite because he sees it as a toy. I keep saying "ouch" with a higher tone and withdrawing attention but it's not working. He'll just lie on top of my purring until I move my hand and phone again! In fact every time I say ouch when he bites he stops for a second and then continues no mater how much I withdraw attention.

Last night has especially been harder and he's been more biostrious than ever! He's jumping all over me, biting, playing rough, basically no boundaries. If I try hold him by the scruff of his neck and say "no" whilst removing him which is what I've been doing generally which behavioural things my hands get in the cross fire as he's moving around so much I don't even get to his neck and he starts rough play.

Now I can't move him into another room as I have no other room and I want to start setting the rules now before it gets worse as I see already he's getting more comfortable and naughty. I understand he's a kitten and he had lots of energy but until his bed arrives what can I do? I want to have a method which I can stick to from now on which isn't confusing as I think I've not been doing so well

I try to play with him and feed him before bed as much as I can which works in the sense that it settles him to sleep as same time as me, but since he's been waking me up constantly past few nights it would be good to know how to deal with the sleep situation and the biting with "positive reinforcement".

Many thanks. X

This is mostly typical kitten behavior. They're little idiots with short attentions spans! However, because he's not playing with other cats he might have more trouble learning what is too much force to use in play as he gets older and stronger, so it is good to take some steps to discourage using people as toys.

You may already be doing this, but let your housemate know as well, that you should never use your hands as a toy when you're playing with him.

Some cats do not respond well to the crying ouch method. If they're attacking you to get you to pay attention to them, then clearly they were doing something right because you responded! If it's during the day, I'd recommend being completely still as a statue until he stops, and then reward him with some play time with a toy once he's being good, something like throwing a little mouse around rather than a wand toy so he learns he can play with that toy by himself. Once he starts on your hands again though, playtime stops. It might take him a while to get the message because kittens will try something a hundred times with the same results before they learn, but hang in there and be consistent and he'll eventually understand.

At night, he needs to learn that nothing is going to get you to play with him so he needs to just play by himself. Ignore whatever crazy antics he tries as best you can. Engaging him at all will only encourage him to pester you more. He probably won't be able to sleep quietly through the night for a while because of his age, so you might just have to learn to become a heavier sleeper. I hate to break the news to you, but it's possible that now that he's discovered how much fun the big bed is, he won't stay in his own cat bed once it arrives.

All in all, though, it sounds like he's adjusted very well and is very happy! Kittens are definitely a handfull.

Thank you so much!

I'm going to try implement what you've suggested.

We had a bad night last night due to my bf staying over and not being able to ignore him so we ended up noting sleep at all!

I think I'm going to try a room divider as I feel that might be the best solution in the situation I have.

I've also recently noticed that he's started to groom himself a lot more than usual. Is this normal as they get older? Every time he sits down or settles he's licking himself!

@Molly92  Just one question: if he bites me and I then withdraw and sit still, what do I do after? Because he will just climb on my lamp, shoulders, or settled in for a  snooze or bite me again, so I'm not sure sitting still/not petting/playing with him gives him the dirt correlation to not bite?

He sometimes bites me even if we are not playing. For examples as I'm typing this on my laptop, he bit my arm twice! I sat still for a while but then I wasn't sure for how long to sit still? He just contuse to climb on my laptop as usual after!

Be sure not to move your hand away when he starts biting, just immediately freeze. If you pull your hand away, it's interesting and gives him something to chase. 

Then, when he gets bored of gnawing on your hand, play with him for a toy for a minute and then go back to what you were doing. He's probably going to be persistent and keep it up for a while, but if you're consistent he'll start to realize that nothing fun happens when he bites you, but a lot of fun happens when he plays with toys! 

Same goes with biting other body parts. Just be still for a minute, it doesn't have to be long because kittens have short attention spans, then redirect him to a fun toy. (If you figure out how to keep him off your laptop, let me know. I'm still constantly removing my 5 year old cat from the keyboard!)

Cats are usually very thorough groomers, though I can't remember when kittens start getting really good at it. Unless he's scratching a lot as well or grooming so much that he's getting bald patches, there's nothing to worry about.

Ok so I just had the worst bite attack. He was chilling next to me on the sofa as I was working on the laptop and all of a sudden my arm become a big toy. He wrapped his body around it and started biting and scratching non stop. Keeps saying ouch and didn't move my arm away despitr the pain but he wouldn't stop and I just left the room as I didn't know what to do! If I play with him now, would that not be rewarding what he's just done?

This behavior will greatly improve with time, he is a kitten and like all kittens, sees EVERYTHING as fair game to amuse himself with. Another male kitten with the same temperament would be the best solution, but if that is not possible you have to assume the role of a parent and not a friend at times like these. A loud "NO"!!, enough to startle him would help, also taking him by the scruff of the neck to hold him still and telling him no is what mama would have done, just be careful, you are much larger and stronger. You will notice the vet doing this also, to calm and control a cat. I know it sounds strange, but hissing really loud works too, he understands that language! I agree with leaving the room, or isolating him in a small one for a time out would help, but make sure it is not over 5-10 minutes, kittens have a very short attention span and he would wonder why he is being so unfairly punished after a short while. For now, carry treats and small toys with you and when he becomes 'aggressive' ( really though, just typical kitten behavior) give him one to distract him by tossing it a short distance away. You most likely have learned early warning signs, like a swishing tail, growls, raised fur, stiff legs, and dilated pupils, so try to head off rough housing with something besides your arm. Above all, remember that cats do not respond to physical punishment, they just become afraid of you and will avoid the source of their pain, which is you.  Good luck, IT WILL GET BETTER, just hang in there!

You mentioned that you said "ouch" to try to get him to stop sometimes.. When my kitten began to bite and play too aggressively with me, i would actually yowl like a cat in pain. He would alway stop immediately. Maybe since that is the sound he makes when something hurts him, he realizes that when I make the same sound it hurts me too?

For the rabbit kicking (when he hangs on and kicks with his back feet), you use toys that are bigger and substantial, even stuffed animals, for him to play with, and gently pull him off your arm and substitute this toy instead, pressing it up against his stomach so the instinct to kick is triggered. With enough repetitions, he should learn that this toy is what he should pounce on when he gets the urge! 

So for the past few days I've been trying what you kindly suggested @clmgordon and it's so weird that it kinda works!

As soon as he hears my pain meow he stops and starts licking, he does keep biting after that but without enough repetitions of meows he stops all together and moves on. Since doing this I've also realised he's a little gentler in general too! It's kind awesome because it's like your actually speaking and communicating with your cat!

He often bites when I'm lying in bed at night and in the morning so instead of moving/giving him attention, just making that sound seems like an effective solution. Although it hasn't stopped him entirely from biting I hope it continues to have some effect!

P.s I do really need to work on my pain meows as I do not sound like a cat and as sometimes it's just pure human pain sounds! :lol3::

had a feeling that as soon as I would post my precious message that it would perhaps jinx it! He throughly went for both arms this morning despite my extended yowles....!