Treatments or anything for anxiety!!

My 3 year old hand raised cat is anxious because we've just adopted a new kitten (4 months old). I think she's having a hard time because she came to me when she was still blind and deaf so I don't even think she's ever seen another cat. She also has one eye so being low on the ground is very threatening and scary for her.
For now the rest of my animals (2 dogs) have accepted him fine. He's now sleeping in my mums room to make sure he's not lonely. But my poor resident cat, I don't know how I can make her feel better. She was never a cuddly cat. So I can only offer her pats but I will buy pretty much anything (and yes, I've heard of Feliway and it's on my list but) I'm looking for something a bit cheaper and was wondering experience you all have??

How are you going about doing introductions between the two cats?  It is extremely important the cats have a slow introduction period.  This can take anywhere from a few weeks to many many months.  Cats are very territorial.  When you bring a new cat into the mix, this upsets the balance.  The reaction from your resident kitty is fairly normal, but also a sign that you may be rushing the process. 

Here are some guidelines and a video on cat to cat introductions.  The key is to take things very slow.  If one of the cats is anxious, stressed, meowing, yowling, howling, swishing tail or flat ears, you are not ready to progress to the next step.  The cats should be separated 24/7 for now.  They should not be able to see each other. 

As far as treatments, feliway does work, but it often requires more than one plug in to be effective.  You can also look into flower essences you put into food or water.  None are quick fixes.  Most likely your resident kitty will settle down when you slow down the intro process and take smaller steps.  Also give resident kitty lots of extra attention, treats and reassurance.

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/the-ultimate-yet-simplified-guide-to-introducing-cats

http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/a-simple-little-trick-to-use-during-new-cat-introductions/

http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/cat-behavior/introducing-your-cat-new-cat

http://jacksongalaxy.com/2010/10/01/cat-to-cat-introductions/

 

So keeping him locked in a bedroom is okay?? On a Facebook page I was called cruel for saying that he stays in there at night. I feel I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. One hand I don't want to isolate the kitten but on the other I don't want to traumatize my resident cat.
She's eaten more today, also she finally peed and pooped in her box. So hooray! Also read online about skullcap tea leafs are good for anxiety for cats and I had a bag in my cupboard for my anxiety so I sprinkled a little bit of it in her food. Also she's gotten into the bag before while I was out so at least I know she's attracted to it and likes it. It's part of the mint family like catnip but it promises a relaxation feeling.She's roaming around cautiously this morning which I'm happy about. She hasn't been very active since we brought in the kitten. And I have been giving her lots of love but also feel guilty about the kitten. I don't know how to balance it. I'll separate them permanently so I can start the process again. She's okay around his scent. He's been on her cat tree and spread his scent a bit so she is curious she just seems petrified of the bell sound. Should I maybe take the collar off so that she's not overwhelmed by the sound?

It's absolutely fine for him to be in a room by himself all night, and a bathroom is just fine at this stage When I took my girl in (almost a year ago now), she lived in a small room for the first 2-3 months, and was crated at night in that room as it was impossible to kitten proof.

The most important thing is to keep your resident cat comfortable with the speed of introduction. She'll ultimately adjust and adapt faster if you give her the space and time she needs at this stage.

Do look over all the links shadowsrescue posted - they explain the introduction process really clearly.

Hang in there. Somebody else said this process can take weeks to months. It's true.

I'm two months into integrating an 8-year-old neutered female and a 2-year-old neutered male. It's been very tough. We're still at the stage where the resident cat hisses and growls at the mere sight of the newbie. For his part, he can't resist the native instinct to seize her from behind and drag her off by the scruff of the neck, even though neither of them would know what to do next.

The resident kitty, rescued from a nasty situation where her first litter happened when she was much too young and the second one much too soon after, has always been skittish and anxious. She used to get along well with the old boy who lived here when she arrived, but he's been gone for a few years now and she seems to have forgotten she used to not be afraid of ALL other cats.

There is nothing wrong with keeping the two cats separated as they adjust to the new situation. Forcing them to interact will only bring unwanted conflict and won't make them BFF's any sooner. I know from painfully recent experience.

My two cats are never in the same room together, never outside at the same time. They see each other through a pair of windows set at right angles to each other, where the house forms an L-shape. They spend a lot of time in their respective windows, glaring at each other, but they would be aware of each other even if they couldn't see each other. It seems to be a painless (mostly) way to let them ease into a relationship on their own terms. Not easy, but fast just doesn't work here.

I split my time between the two rooms, giving each cat lots of cuddles and attention. They trade off who gets to sleep in the bedroom and who gets the run of the house overnight.

Try an online search for pet anxiety remedies. You should get hits for a number of homeopathic herbal drops to add to food or water which may help. They seem to work for my big newbie, mellowing him somewhat. No apparent impact on the the nevous little girl, though, unfortunately. I used Bach Flower Essences, the general Rescue Remedy Pet and a proprietary blend from a cat behavior counselor.

I've introduced lots of new cats to the household over the years. The easiest were the pair of neutered female littermate kittens who were readily accepted by the two resident neutered females, both of whom had had litters of their own. These two current guys are without a doubt the toughest ever.

Time and patience. Keep in touch here - let's compare notes on our success.