Help! Need advice about a homeless stray!

I could really use some knowledgeable advice.   There's a stray that's been living near us and sometimes on our property for a year. I had never fed her before.  In the last 2 months she started sleeping every night on our back porch because it's winter and she's probably cold.   I felt very sorry for her and offered food for a while as I investigated who she might belong to.  She became suddenly very friendly and loving with the presence of food (previously she would bite and scratch if I went near her).   Talking to neighbors,  I learned that someone moved away and abandoned her.  And that my neighbor across the street has now been feeding her every day and even took her to the vet to update vaccinations.  (She had no microchip.)   Yet at the same time,  this neighbor who is feeding her is not taking responsibility / ownership of the cat.  She says "it's not my cat and I won't ever spend vet money on her again".   I also learned the cat sleeps on multiple neighbors back porches besides mine. So she does have dry shelter options elsewhere.  And several people offer her a constant water supply.  These neighbors all say they like the cat hanging around because she kills rodents and is a very good hunter.





Ok, Here's the problem:  The Cat has become obsessed with my back yard in the last 2 months and she uses it as one giant litter box,  burying poop under the mulch and peeing on plants.  It's quite a horrible mess and stinks badly.    She's also tearing up other plants, digging destructively in certain places and I caught her trying to poop in my garden where I grow food.    She's also very territorial with my yard.  If I try to walk by certain bushes that she likes to hide and sleep under she will hiss , jump out and attack my feet. She liked the wet food I had given her for a short time and now she's begging me for food three times a day, instead of going across the street to her other food source.  I realize I made a mistake by feeding her,  but I didn't know someone else was. I even tried to bring her inside my home to see if she wants to be an indoor cat and she HATES it indoors. Other neighbors tried to bring her indoors unsuccessfully also.  Because of the destruction, I want her off my property.  I just installed an ultrasounic cat deterrent in the back yard.   And I sprayed a non-toxic cat deterrent on the fences so she won't jump them anymore. So far it's working to keep her out of the back.  





But I feel very sad and torn. She's crouched pitifully in my front yard right now and won't leave. I did bond with the cat in this short time frame.  I saw how much she flourished with good food and love. And I think it's totally unfair for the neighbors to just keep her around like a homeless stray with no real home.... And no one really looking out for her.  She deserves a real home. I even considered taking her to a no kill shelter where she might be adopted.   But my husband thinks I should just leave her as is, because she's comfortable in the neighborhood and has a constant food source. He thinks she might be traumatized by a move. And also the neighbors don't want me to do anything.    But I question whether leaving her wandering around the neighborhood like this is the most Humane solution? What do you think?  Any advice would be appreciated. 

It would be best if one of your neighbors or you could build her a shelter. This way she would have a permenant consistant outdoor home. I would also build an outdoor litter box. I have two for my outdoor cats one covered and one uncovered with sand.

If you dont want to do any of those things and your neighbors dont either I feel like the best thing to do is leave her. It sounds like she has a food source and places she goes for water and shelter. She will learn to stay away from your property by the sprayer. Although maybe with some more paitience and yard modifications you and her can live happily together in the yard. There are suggestions on how to live with out door cats online...check out neighborhood cats, ASPCA. Maybe plant some cat nip that she can rip up so she leaves the other plants alone. Coffee grinds and orange peels keep them out of areas you dont want them to be. Also some plants that keep them away.

I worry if you bring her to a shelter she will not be adoptable due to her demenor indoors. How long did you have her inside, maybe thats still an option, but there are different things you need to try like a plug in diffusor to calm her etc.

For some reason she has kind of adopted you. You might be the kind hearted soul she needs to help her out.

WHERE DO YOU LIVE- I live in NJ & right now it is 15 degrees out If you live where winters are cold- TAKE THE KITTY IN- what are you waiting for- you sound or said that the 2 of you have bonded - soooo give her a place to live-you wont regret it - I have taken in 7 strays & each one gets better- and believe it- THEY ARE GRATEFUL

Thanks for your suggestions. I appreciate your reassurance that it's probably ok to just leave her as is. I don't know why I'm so worried about her and feeling so terrible about it. We thought about making an outdoor litter box. But honestly, there's SO much cat poop all over our very large yard. I can't even find it all, although I can smell it. It's buried in wood mulch all around my plants which has created an unsanitary disaster. Even if I provide a sandbox, I feel extremely doubtful she will ever stop using the mulch. Indoors, she is destructive and claws everything in sight. Perhaps it could all change with patience. But I honestly don't want a pet, especially a cat. And I travel too often to be truly responsible for her. But I like your suggestion about an outdoor shelter and I will mention that to the neighbors. They tell me she never poops on their properties, so maybe they can build one over there. Meanwhile, I will keep working on training her out of my yard. It's hard for me because I have a weakness for animals that beg for food.... but I'm going to try hard to hold by boundaries.

Shelter would be out of the question, she would be deemed as unadoptable and sent to county and euthanized.

What's so sad about her is that she was once owned, giving her the sense of worth and belonging, which she no longer has.

Can you imagine that feeling? Once a cat has that home life and owned, leaving them is so hard for them.

Personally I would love to see you put a cat door in and allow her to come in and at least thaw her freezing bones out.

You can continue with yard deterrents regardless, put a litter box in the house near the door and food and water.

She's been on her own for some time so she is not used to indoors now, she lost trust that it's safe, but in time, she will gain it back and be much better.

JAG007 said:

WHERE DO YOU LIVE- I live in NJ & right now it is 15 degrees out If you live where winters are cold- TAKE THE KITTY IN- what are you waiting for- you sound or said that the 2 of you have bonded - soooo give her a place to live-you wont regret it - I have taken in 7 strays & each one gets better- and believe it- THEY ARE GRATEFUL

Click to expand...

I live on the West Coast, 30 miles from the ocean. Our coldest time of year (December) has passed. It was 28 degrees a few nights. Now it's in the 50's at night. I tried to bring her in at 28 degrees and she would not stand for it. Freaked out and Clawed the door to get out and bolted out there. I tried to bring her in several times during the pouring rain.... same result. In fact, this is the only cat I've ever seen that goes out in the rain and hangs out getting wet as though she enjoys it. Occasionally we do get heavy, wet, coastal fog that I know has to be miserable for her. But I couldn't even find her on the foggy night. She went to a different hiding spot.

catwoman707 said:

Shelter would be out of the question, she would be deemed as unadoptable and sent to county and euthanized.

What's so sad about her is that she was once owned, giving her the sense of worth and belonging, which she no longer has.
Can you imagine that feeling? Once a cat has that home life and owned, leaving them is so hard for them.

Personally I would love to see you put a cat door in and allow her to come in and at least thaw her freezing bones out.
You can continue with yard deterrents regardless, put a litter box in the house near the door and food and water.

She's been on her own for some time so she is not used to indoors now, she lost trust that it's safe, but in time, she will gain it back and be much better.

Click to expand...

Yes. Extremely, sad. This is exactly why I feel she deserves a real home and not continue as a wanderer. Maybe I can re-home her at a ranch type property where she can live outdoors and still belong to someone?

Yes that is always an option, but I think she should be able to have indoor access also, cats aren't supposed to live outside 24/7, it just doesn't feel right for them.

Relocating means she would have to be acclimated for 4 weeks too, did you know that?

In other words she will need to be closed in a crate or a room/outbuilding that is escape proof until she goes through the mental process of understanding that is her new home so she doesn't wander off and get lost for good.

samarpana1 said:

I live on the West Coast, 30 miles from the ocean. Our coldest time of year (December) has passed. It was 28 degrees a few nights. Now it's in the 50's at night. I tried to bring her in at 28 degrees and she would not stand for it. Freaked out and Clawed the door to get out and bolted out there. I tried to bring her in several times during the pouring rain.... same result. In fact, this is the only cat I've ever seen that goes out in the rain and hangs out getting wet as though she enjoys it. Occasionally we do get heavy, wet, coastal fog that I know has to be miserable for her. But I couldn't even find her on the foggy night. She went to a different hiding spot.

Click to expand...

I have a feeling we live pretty close by each other.

While it's in the 40-50 degree area, as soon as the rain clears it gets cold again. 

Is there any chance of you getting a cat door for her?

thanks for your rapid reply-I wasn't sure of your locale-she is very unusual in that she ENJOYS GETTING WET- all 7 strays that I took in never really showed an urge to go back out- the 7th (year old boy) would go to a door and yowl for a 30-40 seconds but only a few instances- I guess that she should be ok living outside because she doesn't have to worry about the brutal cold- but then there is always the worry of being attacked bu other anials- being hit by an auto- fleas ticks and diseases associated with being outdoors- WELL WHATEVER YOU DECIDE WILL BE OK-  GOOD LUCK

samarpana1 said:

Thanks for your suggestions. I appreciate your reassurance that it's probably ok to just leave her as is. I don't know why I'm so worried about her and feeling so terrible about it. We thought about making an outdoor litter box. But honestly, there's SO much cat poop all over our very large yard. I can't even find it all, although I can smell it. It's buried in wood mulch all around my plants which has created an unsanitary disaster. Even if I provide a sandbox, I feel extremely doubtful she will ever stop using the mulch. Indoors, she is destructive and claws everything in sight. Perhaps it could all change with patience. But I honestly don't want a pet, especially a cat. And I travel too often to be truly responsible for her. But I like your suggestion about an outdoor shelter and I will mention that to the neighbors. They tell me she never poops on their properties, so maybe they can build one over there. Meanwhile, I will keep working on training her out of my yard. It's hard for me because I have a weakness for animals that beg for food.... but I'm going to try hard to hold by boundaries.

Click to expand...

Hi Samarpana

I guess you wont know about the litter box till you try it.  I think it is worth a shot.  It really doesn't take that much effort.  You can try two a sandbox and a covered type and see what she gravitates too.  You can entice her with catnip and food near it.  I use a  something called cat attract.  They make this shaker stuff you can sprinkle in the box.  It has helped a lot with them using the box.

It seems you have guilt and sympathy for her, so I know a part of you wants to help.  It is of course easier to just get rid of her, but you might be surprised with the results if you are patient and compassionate.  If she isn't fixed this can also result in spraying which is more smelly then her usual duty.  If you wanted to take the next step with her, it would be to get her fixed, provide shelter and food and water and allow her to live out her life.  

A cat door is also a great idea, my guess is when you brought her inside it was too sudden and it made her feel scared and trapped.  She got used to surviving outside, so to bring her back in would require some more patience like leaving a door open and allowing her to visit. Even though you are feeding her she doesn't trust you fully, and I don't blame her.  Maybe feed her inside with a door open so she doesn't feel trapped.  Before you know it her visits might get longer and longer and after a couple months.  You might be able to close that door behind her and not have that crazy panic that she feels.

Just some ideas.  

If you are dead set on keeping her out of your yard, then please google human ways to keep cats out, like mentioned before Neighborhood Cats and ASPCA have great tips.

Good luck to you, praying that this little girl to find someone to help her.

catwoman707 said:

Yes that is always an option, but I think she should be able to have indoor access also, cats aren't supposed to live outside 24/7, it just doesn't feel right for them.
Relocating means she would have to be acclimated for 4 weeks too, did you know that?
In other words she will need to be closed in a crate or a room/outbuilding that is escape proof until she goes through the mental process of understanding that is her new home so she doesn't wander off and get lost for good.

Click to expand...

Are there any resources / websites you can point me to that give instructions for the rehoming process? I may have to try. I have a friend with ranch property. He keeps cats around to kill rodents. And this might be perfect for her since she's obsessed with staying outdoors and she's an excellent hunter. She's has totally decimated the lizard population in my yard. I'd love to know more about how to successfully move her.