3 Months In. Need advice.

Howdy,

Ok. I have 2 wonderful cats that are like family to me. One was born in my home and she's getting pretty old. The other was a scrubby grey male kitten found outside my porch several years who grew up to be the most beautiful (and big) Russian Blue. Neither are declawed.  I love my cats. I love animals.

On Thanksgiving Day, I heard the most miserable sound coming from my basement. It turned out to be a semi-longhair black female who was days away from starvation. She's declawed/spayed, roughly 6, but was in pretty rough shape. I took her to the vet,  and was cleared of leukemia with only a respiratory infection to deal with.

I've tried to foster a good environment. I was worried that my big boy would hurt her badly, but the other two were rather scared of her at first. I gave/give them space and there hasn't been any outright fights. Just the disdain. But the new one just won't shake the street off. She's very easily agitated and spends a lot of time making my other two uncomfortable at the least. As of today, I've had to lock her out of the bedroom where she's been staying because she's started using the bed as a litter box. She didn't show this issue the first 8 weeks or so. At least I can't find it anyway.  She is occasionally sweet and friendly to me, but that can change in a moment. I don't know what to do to make this situation better and am getting quite frustrated as I thought time would ease her personality and maybe we'd get a breakthrough.

Life was so nice with me and my other 2 before and I'm starting to wish this new one not here. No one's going to take her and I couldn't ask someone to anyway.

Taking in rescues sure isn't like what those shows depict. Any advice on turning this situation around and getting her to be more friendly? Or something that will make this experience better?

Ok - Also, I guess this is closer to 2 months, but I can't seem to find the edit option for posts.

First of all, do you have a spare room where you can keep her? If you have a spare bedroom, get a waterproof sheet (a couple of bucks at Walmart). Typically cats pee on a bed or clothes, when they are insecure about their position. They want to merge their scent with yours.

Keep her in the spare room until she feels safe and comfortable with you. Make sure she has a hiding spot (f.e. a cat carrier with bedding) and high space(s) like a cat tree or furniture that she is allowed to jump onto.

Once she is comfortable with you, and not having accidents, introduce her to your other cats. There is plenty of information online how to introduce cats to each other, and I can help too.

You say, occasionally she is sweet and friendly. What does she do when she is not friendly? Is she scared of you? Does she get over-stimulated after a while of petting? Watch her body language. Learn to read her. Cats usually show it when they´ve had enough. Flipping tail for example.

With more information about her behaviour maybe we can be of more help.

Thanks for the reply!

Since she's cut herself off of the one bedroom today, she'll be granted access to the back bedroom with linoleum flooring. And thank you for the insight about them going on beds/clothing. I did not know that.

As I mentioned, she's always in ready to fight mode whenever the other cats are within her sight. Meanwhile, my two just look back at her. Thankfully, there's not physical issues. However, my other cats are clearly affected by her presence and my older one wouldn't even come downstairs the first couple of weeks. I had to feed my older female up in my room. She's really aggressive towards them.

She's actually in one of her good moods right now and has been quite affectionate toward me the last half hour or so. This happens, but can turn on a dime.

I think you're correct with the statement that she gets over-stimulated after awhile of petting. There's no other seemingly logical reason for her mood swings.

I wouldn't say she's scared of me, but when I carry her downstairs after I let my male cat out to make sure she eats, she growls and hisses the whole way down. I understand that she's being self-protective, but how long does this go on?
 

It depends on the cats. Some get used to each other quickly, others need a long time. It is important that you don´t got by your own pace, but the cats set the pace.

Here is a good resource on introducing cats to each other:

http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/how-to-introduce-a-second-cat/

If you want to dive in some more, the book of Pam Johnson-Bennet is very good.

I think in your case you should make an effort to get to know the new cat better before you introduce her to the resident cats. The better you know her (and she knows you!), the easier it will be to understand her body language and adjust your care accordingly.

Oh, and hissing in the face of something unfamiliar or scary is quite normal for cats. Even the friendliest cats often hiss when confronted with a strange cat. It means "I don´t know you, leave me alone". Most cats don´t make friends as quickly as dogs, but that doesn´t mean they are unsocial.

Appreciate the link.

She's kind of already very much introduced to the other two. We had a big step forward today as she was happily purring and sleeping underneath the comforter while I was napping all the while unbeknownst to her, lay my male cat just out of her sight(when she wasn't under the covers) 2 feet away and watching her the whole time. I just wish she and my other female cat would bond because I just know my other female cat would love more cat affection and I'd be so much more relieved if this new one would just get beyond the fear.

I guess it's just a waiting game then. I'll likely try some of the techniques on the link you offered and see what happens.

And never give up. Some cats just need time. If you have a way of building an enclosure or installing a screen door between two rooms, that would make things easier. Then the cats could see each other without being able to fight.