Moving out for the 1st time and mom won't keep my cat..heartbroken

I am moving to NYC for a 6 month internship and then leaving to serve in the Peace Corps for 2+ years.  Taking my cat with me is absolutely out of the question.  There is no reason for my mom not to keep her other than "she doesn't want a cat".  It's incredibly frustrating and heartbreaking and at this point we are barely speaking.  I don't think I can ever forgive her if she makes me give my cat away and I don't know what else to do.

Backstory: I received a kitten as a present from my dad 10 years ago after my parent's divorce (I was living with him at the time).  He thought it would help me cope and I instantly fell in love with her - she has been by my side through high school and I took her to college when my dad remarried to a woman who was extremely allergic to cats.  After college I moved back in with my mom and have been here, with the cat, for the past 1.5 years.  Now I'm leaving and she refuses to keep the cat.  I've been trying to rehome her for months to family/friends with no luck.  I don't know if I can bear giving her to a stranger and never getting to see her again.  Rehoming feels impossible at this point because the fact is she is 11 years old, with the onset of kidney problems, and she only likes "her" people.  She can be aggressive and intimidating when she is fearful, but she is a completely different cat when she is comfortable.

I'm just at my wit's end.  My mom is really hurting me and I wish there was a way I could convince her to keep the cat

Oh, no. I'm so sorry your mother is refusing to help. Is this your cat in the avatar? She could be twins to my own cat.

Can you father take her? (Sorry, just read his new wife is allergic). What I would do is contact local rescues in your area and ask for a long-term foster. Will you be able to get her back when you return? Do you have any friends, or even former teachers who can help? Can you contact the Peace Corps? Go on their FB page, if they have one? Maybe someone who's been in the PC will be able to foster her--surely, many have left pets and worried about them. What a horrible situation to be in. I just cannot comprehend some people.

This is so sad.... I feel for you and your kitty.

Could your Dad help you find someone for her? Could he ask some of his friends?

I am sure, that if his current wife was not allergic, he would take her in...but maybe he can help...

It could not hurt to ask his help...

I do not know what else to do..

Is there a local no kill humane organization who could foster her while you are away? or with the idea of re-homing her... I think really humane ones would understand your situation and try to help... what about the ASPCA? or a local Vet... a lot of the techs are fosters...

I don't know where you are--knowing your location might be helpful.

My thought is that if your cat goes to someone who voluntarily takes on foster cats, that person (if an experienced foster parent) is already more likely to be someone who knows and understands cats coming from difficult situations or who have special needs.

Around the tri-state area, there is the Best Friends Animal Society. As far as I know, they are good people (other people here may be able to speak re: BF). I would contact them before going to NYC.

Here's the thing, as @Kittens Mom mentioned, once you leave, you have no control.

When I was 9 years old, I got a bunny. The bunny was still alive when I went away to college at 18. A 9 year-old bunny is old (life span=about 9 years), and I was under the impression that my parents would care for her until she passed away. They did not. For no particular reason other than they didn't want to.

When I was in NYC, I had a house rabbit. I brought her back out to CA. Rabbits are highly destructive animals, and, when she was 7 years old, I moved into an apartment which did not allow rabbits (most apartments don't). I took her to be adopted/re-homed. I kept visiting her while she was waiting for a new family. And she got one. Luckily for me, the bunny was good with cats, and had a new home with a cat. It made me very sad, but I felt relieved in knowing that she would be well-cared for, and that someone else would enjoy having her. I also know, from talking to the people where I took her, that having someone invested in her welfare kept them on their toes, searching for an appropriate/good home in a timely manner.

Also, there are non-profit organizations that do long-term fosters for military personnel. I would consider contacting one of these organizations because, while you are not military, you are entering the PC, and will be going abroad to do service. They may be able to help, or they may point you in the direction of someone or some organization which can help.

I hope this works out--please let us know! It makes me sad when I think that a person's family doesn't know/understand how a cat/pet is family, too.

Kittens Mom said:

Dealing with it before you leave is a must. If your mom agrees and then changes her mind while you're gone you will have no control.

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I couldn't agree more! I had to leave my cats in FL with my parents until I got back on my feet. Just the other day my mom told me that she gave one of my cats to my sister LAST WEEK. She did it behind my back because she knows that I can't stand my sister and dislike how she cares and treats her pets. The kicker...she handed him over to my sister because my parents have my nephews dog. Since his dog showed up, my boy started spraying. My nephew doesn't want his mom to keep his dog for the same reason I don't want her to have my cat. My mom assured me that I can have him back when I'm ready and I'm sure that's the case....if she doesn't kill him or get rid of him first.

Do you think that maybe the reason why your mom won't keep her is because where she came from? If so,and if you have no other options you can explain to her that your cat is what helped you through their divorce.

Either way, I wish you and Kitty the best!