Rescued Stray does not meow now inside

Hello, and thank you for allowing me to post a question.

I am a new cat person. My family has been a dog family ever since I was born. I have adopted a cat, and trying to be an “animal guy” instead of just a dog guy, and it is a learning experience.

So here is my long story and seek your advice.

Last September, my black lab and beagle cornered what I thought was a raccoon in my enclosed patio, it was actually an emaciated cat. When I called the dogs back in, I fed it some lunch meat, and it began meowing like crazy. My wife and I gave it water and just hung out with it, she came to us and seemed to be a sweet cat.

So, we figured she would be back on her way to her home so we left food and water out for her and figured that she might be back, or might not be.

Well two weeks went by with her coming back every night, and then I found she was living under my shed. So one night I closed the patio door and took her to the vet to adopt her. Only to find she was micro-chipped and the owner lived three miles down the road from me. I was slightly heart broken, but relieved.

Then two weeks later getting medicine for my aging beagle I found that the owner relinquished her to the shelter after three days because they got a new cat when the other one disappeared, and when she came back, she did not get along with the new cat.

So, I went and rescued her again, she was in the shelter for two weeks.

She is exactly 3 years 5 months because she was born at the shelter and adopted from there as a kitten, before being returned.

The good:

* She has been in our home since Sept 26

* Sept 16^th she weighed 6.2 pounds today she weighs 10

* She uses both her litter boxes and has not had an accident outside of them

* The vet says she is in good health, and she has been spayed

* She gets along with the dogs, but there is mis-communication because she runs up and bats them, and when they walk away she is visibly kind of sad.

* she has cat furniture in each room, and a cat tree in the kitchen and living room, and she uses them all.

* She plays for about an hour each day, 35 -40 minutes in the morning, and then usually two 15-20 minute sessions at night.

* She is curious and follows my wife and I around, when we have people over she is curious to meet them, but then just and goes to hang out on her furniture

* The dogs could slightly care less she is here

* Cat does not hide, walks through the house with a high amount of confidence, but she does watch the dogs

* She is fine with petting, and seems to like it. When I see her tail swishing back and forth, I can make it stand straight up with the little kink at the top by rubbing where her tail meets her back. Otherwise she likes cheek rubs when she is on her cat trees, or coffee tables.

The part I have questions:

1. She used to meow outside to get my attention, but now she is inside she never meows, she makes these weird grunt noises, and that is it. I really miss hearing her meow, is there a way to vocalize to her to get her to meow to me again?

2. She only purred and kneaded once, when I put her in her sherpa cat bed, since then, nothing. I would really like her to purr.

3. I am having a hard time interpreting what is a love bite, what is an invitation to play, and what is a leave me alone soft-bite. I know in the morning in bed, she will softly bite my hand until I wake up and break out the bird toy (I wish she would meow instead..) ... but sometimes I will give her my finger, and she will softly bite it, and then drop her head down for more rubs with her tail still...

4. My grandparents adopted a 1 year old male from the shelter that is 90% more affectionate. It purrs, rubs against your legs, all sorts of nice stuff. Is my cat still getting past her issues? ( Was what she went through that bad for a cat?)

Thanks everyone, I know this was a long post, but I could use the advice.

The part I have questions:

1. She used to meow outside to get my attention, but now she is inside she never meows, she makes these weird grunt noises, and that is it. I really miss hearing her meow, is there a way to vocalize to her to get her to meow to me again?

You really can't make a cat meow

   If you have a look around the site you would be amazed at the number of threads started by people whose cat just won't shut up!

   I really wouldn't worry about this one.

2. She only purred and kneaded once, when I put her in her sherpa cat bed, since then, nothing. I would really like her to purr.

Give her time. 

3. I am having a hard time interpreting what is a love bite, what is an invitation to play, and what is a leave me alone soft-bite. I know in the morning in bed, she will softly bite my hand until I wake up and break out the bird toy (I wish she would meow instead..) ... but sometimes I will give her my finger, and she will softly bite it, and then drop her head down for more rubs with her tail still...

Firstly, remember to never use your hands as toys.. that will be seen as an attack invitation.  My girl will very gently bite me when she wants something.. normally food, or a brushing down.  It's a way of getting your attention.

4. My grandparents adopted a 1 year old male from the shelter that is 90% more affectionate. It purrs, rubs against your legs, all sorts of nice stuff. Is my cat still getting past her issues? ( Was what she went through that bad for a cat?)

All cats are different.  We choose to have them and we accept what they are.  Having said that, if I've done my sums correctly you haven't had her very long.  The poor thing has been shunted around and will take time to settle in to her new, very lovely, home.  She's lucky to have found you.

Thanks everyone, I know this was a long post, but I could use the advice.

I've seen a lot longer!

And welcome to TCS!

God bless you for going the extra mile for this cat! Cats need time to adjust to new situations, so just allow her to be and see what happens. We have chatty cats and one who I've never heard meow, one who purrs when you say her name and another who has never purred. (He's the same cat who doesn't meow). So, as Mani said, all cats are different.

We do have a cat who "talks back" when we meow. I swear she is trying to repeat what we say. Talk softly to her when you interact, even meowing. See what happens.

I would also caution against using your hands as a toy. Once she gets used to her sourroundings, she may turn out to be a cat who likes to spar and you would not want the full force of those teeth chomping on your hand!

Otherwise, it sounds like things are going well. She actually sounds like she's adjusting, so who knows? One day she may wake you up with some songs.

Hi Everyone, Gee whiz, thanks for replying to me so fast!!!

And thank you for the kind words about taking in the cat. I really appreciate the advice! I have to admit I fell for her pretty fast, On the third night she came over she was in the outside rocking chair with my wife all stretched out and sleeping. When I found she was at the shelter, well, I was in the car within 10 minutes.

I am trying to keep my hands away from her as toys as much as possible. I bought tons of wand toys, but the two toys she loves are "da bird" and wadded up paper balls I crinkle and toss around, and toilet paper tubes... go figure right!?

So my wife never had pets, and I introduced her to dogs (the beagle and the black lab, who we got as puppies 13 years ago), and now by complete chance we have a cat. My friend just had kittens and we are trying to talk ourselves out of taking one in. We have a 1200 sq foot house, and that might just be too much animal for me to handle. (especially now that I am just learning how to care for cats).

...a kitten in this situation is a bad idea right?

Thanks again everyone!

So my wife and I discussed this more this morning and we decided that a kitten was just too much.

I need to keep some cycles open so I can take care of the aging dogs and keep the house clean/take care of things.

As much as I want a cat that meows and purrs, those are my wants not what butters is. I think I am obsessing about the cat because it's something I have never had to deal with before, so its all new and exciting.

So, I am going to focus on keeping the current family happy, healthy and safe; and try to put my mind to other hobbies.

Thanks everyone for the advice, and if you have anymore about my situation please share!!

You've done a wonderful thing for this cat!

Not getting a kitten is probably the best decision since Butters didn't get along with her former owners' new cat. That may have been because they didn't make proper introductions or give her enough time to adjust to the "interloper", but there are also a lot of felines that prefer to be " only cats".

As others have said, some cats are very vocal while others aren't. That applies to kittens, too. A lot of it is simply personality. Sometimes there's a whole litter of kittens that constantly meow, purr, squeak, hiss while playing, etc., and another that barely makes a sound.

Your cat may become "chattier" as she settles in. Our last cat never shut up - neighbors 3 doors down said they could hear him at times - so when we got our current cat, my husband thought there was something wrong with him. The most he emitted was a very soft squeak. It took him about a year to start audibly meowing, and even now his purr is so soft you only hear it when he's lying or sitting next to your head. He's very good at communicating with us through body language, though. He constantly gives us the slow blink that many people call "kitty kisses", rubs against us, and leads us to his bowls, the fridge, toys, etc.. He's been with us for >2.5 years now and we've never heard him hiss.
Your cat will find her own way of communicating with you, which may or may not be vocal.

I think you made the right decision, too. Changes are hard on everyone, so giving your cat time to adjust was the kindest thing you can do for her.

In time, you may decide to expand the family but keep in mind she may prefer to be any only cat. Our chattiest the cat has her own room. She hates all our other cats except her brother. And he will only spend ten minutes at a time with her - usually to snarf up her food, :lol3:

Thanks for the advice!

Could you answer another question for me?

We see butters the cat comes up and bats at the beagle and the black lab mix. The beagle ignores her and the black lab walks away.

Is this her trying to get them to play?

We noticed butters came up to the black lab today and gave her a little nibble on the back of the leg (like she does to my ankle in the morning when she wants to be fed) . The dog just looked at her and kept eating, shrugging her off.

I think this is her trying to get them to play...is that a correct observation?

Sounds like it me. Your dogs sound sweet natured. Hopefully, they will learn to play with her. If not, you should plan on having some fun with her. Wand toys are great. Our toy boxes are full of mice and assorted other kitty toys. One or the other of our cats will dig through and choose a toy. Then everyone wants it.

Thanks Ondine!

Then butters really likes to play!

Each morning we play for about 30 minutes between the "da bird"  (she got tired of the mice on a string) and throwing crinkle balls and having her chase, catch and then bat them around. Then in the evening, she loves to play the same way and do laps at a full gallop around the house. that lasts from 20 minutes to 40. When she gets really going, she will arch her back, and then just gallop & grunt through the house about three or four times.

I know cats have energy, but she seems to be drinking red bull or something when I am at work!