Am I wrong to be annoyed?

I work for a woman who contracts to a company so she's considered self employed and I'm her employee. At the office are company employees as well, but neither she nor I actually work for them.

Today I arrive for work and as I'm taking off my coat and hanging it up, the office manager says good morning to me. I said hello back and instantly he jumped all over me for not turning to face him when I spoke. I apologized but he continued to berate me, pretty much making me feel like some little kid he had to set straight (I'm almost 40). Personally if someone was doing something and didn't turn to face me when they said hello, it wouldn't bother me one way or the other, but maybe that's just me. Anyway, all day I've been hearing his tone in my head and it's really ticking me off.

I'm pretty easy going but I can't stomach anyone talking down to me. I apologized, that should've been the end of it, at least that's how I feel, but it wasn't. The lecture was making others uncomfortable and I feel he over stepped his bounds. My boss did warn me that sometimes he has his moments when he's just unbearable to be around, guess this was one of those days.

Just wondering how anyone else would've handled it. I kept my mouth shut but honestly, I wanted to blast him right then and there. Sorry this is long, I needed to let off some steam.

Dawn I would be very angry , what a pathetic thing to have a go at you, you apoligised and that should have been that. Good luck.

He should have never done that in front of other employees or customers/clients. Sounds like he is the one with the problem. I would take him aside and tell him you meant no harm by not looking at him but next time you'd appreciate it if he confronted you in private. That's the professional thing for him to do.

ditto mzjazz2u! What a twerp!

I would be furious

Sounds like he has a chip on his shoulder to me, and i would have said that to him myself!.

People like that really irritate me, they think they are above themselves!.

Susan

Yes you are right to be annoyed! Have a quiet word with him and explain that if he has a problem in future he has to deal with it in private, not in front of an office full of people. I would also have a word with your boss about it, maybe she can have a quiet chat with him also.

He's probably suffering from a little penis complex.

" L O L " !!!!!

During your private talk with him about how he should have handled it, I would let him know that he stepped over the line and that if he EVER berated me in public for someone so petty, I would bring formal harrassment charges against him. No one has the right to treat an employee like that. I would also suggest a third person in the room as an arbitrator.

I have a similar situation here at work. I just started working for the government and there is this supervisor who comes over to some of the other employees and tells them in this really condescending voice "I can hear your conversation can you keep it down". Apparently she has done it to people while they are on the phone! We all sit in cubes so we have no privacy and she herself talks really loud. The nerve! She said that to me the other day and I wanted to smack her but I kept my temper down. I told her that I would lower my voice when I was good at ready haha. I am waiting for the opportunity to get back at her and give her a taste of her own medicine!

You are definitely not wrong to be annoyed!

I had a boss like that about 8 years ago. Complete arrogant, moody, *** hole. I wasnâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]t very happy working there anymore so when he came in one day and swore at me because I didnâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]t greet him I answered back – and told him just what I thought. The whole thing escalated and I ended up quitting at which point he picked up and chair and was about to throw it at me when someone else came along (a witness!) so he put it back down. Thereâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s no easy way to deal with choleric person.

Havenâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]t looked back though – Iâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]m much happier where I am now

You do need to talk to him and tell him that you felt his reaction was immature, unprofessional, and unnecessary. I actually hear better when I'm not looking at someone. My eyes unfocus and I'm only hearing at that point. I can also type and talk to people at the same time (this annoys people in my office, but they know they can talk to me and I'll be turned facing them while I'm still typing). Let him know that all people are different and that what you did meant no harm to him but that you felt what he did was insulting and belittling. Also remind him that a gentle reminder to look at him (if he prefers that) is all you need and that since it is not your custom he may need to do that (ie. "Please look at me--thank you.").

Personally I'd say he's got some deep psychological issues that were probably created in his childhood, but that's not for you to say or help with.

As for the cubicle situation with the nasty boss that says "I can hear you!" all the time. You can always reply, "And I can hear you too, amazing how that works with cubicles, eh?" Maybe it'll get your point across without telling her that she's just plain rude and dumb.

I agree with the above, if the boss feels he needs to tell you something that you did wrong-then in public with other employees and customers being able to see and hear what is being said then it is definitely not appropriate and professional.

Originally posted by Dawn01


I'm pretty easy going but I can't stomach anyone talking down to me. I apologized, that should've been the end of it, at least that's how I feel, but it wasn't. The lecture was making others uncomfortable and I feel he over stepped his bounds. My boss did warn me that sometimes he has his moments when he's just unbearable to be around, guess this was one of those days.

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I would say I have a similiar disposition and I too cannot stand it when I am talked down to. That is why I will never work directly for a male boss EVER again. A school principal is as far as I go if I become a teacher. ALL the male bosses in my previous jobs were awful to work for.