Spend the night in the house, litter box problems

Hi Everyone,

Been a few years since I’ve posted. Sorry in advance for the long story.

A few years ago we trapped a feral (although most likely a stray), had him neutered and brought him back to his own room. Within a few days, wouldn’t leave the carrier, he refused to eat or drink and would not use the litter box. Thinking it was the best for him, we felt that we had no choice but to release him. Joyfully, he came back the next day for dinner!

It’s been a long slow, painfully slow, last couple of years. We did things on his time and we’re in a good place now – he’s built up trust and walks freely into my house to eat twice a day and nap. Until recently always with the kitchen door open, even with the bugs in the summer and the cold of the winter. We did what made him comfortable. He started to rub against my leg about eight months ago and now even lets me pet him. Bumping into my hand or reaching out his paw for more. He even lets me dry him off with a towel when he comes in from the rain. It’s been wonderful. We’re still working on things with my husband, but he sometimes lets him pet him as well. Recently, I’ve started to shut the door after he comes in. Anytime he gets nervous, I quickly open it so that he can see that he’s not trapped. I couldn’t take it anymore… we were either killing bugs from the open door or freezing in the cold months. He relaxed with that as well. He skittish and seems to do better when he’s not confined.  So he has free range to parts of my house – kitchen, living room, dining room and hallway to the bedrooms. He’s curious and follows me around the house if I’m moving around. We have a litter box set up, but he doesn’t seem to want anything to do with it.

I have a next door neighbor that suddenly made her indoor cat an outdoor cat. At first she had the cat on a leash tied to a tree and then the cat was roaming freely all day. And now the cat is purely an outdoor cat with the exception of when she eats. It’s terrible, that cat is scared all of the time. The problem is that she scares my guy. He used to sit outside on my patio for hours once he left the house. Now he’s so scared that he looks both ways when he’s ready to leave and then darts away like the wind. Except for feeding time, he’s never around the backyard. The next door neighbor cat has been a game changer for my cat.

Here’s my problem – three nights ago, my guy jumped on a chair (up until now, he’s always sat/sleep on the floor) and decided that he wasn’t going anywhere. He spent the night in the house. I spent the night on the sofa with the lights on. He stayed on the chair the entire night sleeping (is that normal?). In the morning he ate and then left.   Two nights ago, he ate dinner, stayed around a little and then left (he didn’t like us moving around getting ready for Thanksgiving). Last night was the same routine as before – ate, jumped on the chair and slept. I decided that I was going to sleep in my bed. I thought that if I was trying to socialize him into an indoor cat, I didn’t want him to think that me on the sofa with the lights on was normal. So I left a few lights on low and went to bed with the door open. Again he slept through the night. Around 5:00 in the morning, he started to meow like he was being tortured. I went out and he was happy to see me. He calmed down enough to let me pet him and feed him and then after he ate he started to meow again. He was clearly unnerved. I opened the kitchen door, but he didn’t want to leave. I went to the bedroom to get my husband and when I came out, I noticed that he used the litter box to pee. Yay!! He didn’t cover it up, but at least he used it. I praised him and gave him a treat. I felt so good until two minutes later, when I saw that he pooped under my dining room table. I picked it up and put it in the litter box (he was following me so he saw me doing this). I was in another room when he started to meow terribly again. My husband opened the kitchen door and this time he went out.

Now I don’t know what to do. Do I let him stay again? If yes, should I sleep on the sofa? Although I don’t know how, should I try to make him stay in the kitchen? I hope this doesn’t sound terrible and I know he was probably scared, but not using the litter box is a deal breaker. I love this guy, but after years of this, I’m exhausted and not sure what to do next. Any advice would be appreciated.

I would let him inside as long and as often as he wants.  Yet, I would not make a habit of sleeping downstairs.  As for the litter box issues, he may not know about a litter box.  Outside cats, often pee/poop in separate places.  You will need more litter boxes.  You can try the trick of getting a box with soil or leaves and gradually move to litter or get some Dr. Elsey's Litter Attract and place the litter box out in the open.  The Litter Attract is awesome stuff.

It can take an outside cat awhile to get used to a litter box.  He is used to going outside so please give it some time.  When I brought a feral/stray into the house 2 years ago, it was an adjustment period.  He had a few accidents, but eventually got the hang of it.  When I would find poop on the floor, I would clean it up and bury it into the litter box.  This would attract him to his own scent.

Also if you have other cats in the home be sure that you have enough litter boxes.  The golden rule is one per cat plus one extra.  You can always reduce the number of boxes later, but it's better to have too many than not enough.