Urgent Help With Traumatized Rescue Cat

Hello,

I am in need of some knowledgeable advice. Nearly 5 years ago we adopted a rescue maine coon. The people we got her from were not honest with us when we took her. They told us she had been rehomed many, many times and but did not mention her behavior problems. We later found out she had been a victim of past abuse and displays signs of trauma. It has been a real challenge caring for her these past 5 years. Every few months we have to take her in to the vet to be groomed, and the vet has to sedate her just to groom her. This costs us $400+ every few months. We have been diligently caring for her for years but have reached a financial point where we absolutely cannot afford it anymore. It has been a very difficult decision but we are forced to think about giving her away to a new home.

We have decided not to take her to a shelter for fear that she will be euthanized, or adopted by people who do not know what they are getting into. We do not want her to be rehomed many more times or mistreated ever again, but we also don't know what else to do with her.
Is there some resource or trustworthy society we could take her case to? Our cat needs to be adopted by someone with experience caring for traumatized animals. Her condition has greatly improved since the time we originally got her, but we fear she may have serious problems for the rest of her life. She can sometimes be a very sweet cat who deserves every minute of a happy life and that is what we want for her.

Please help us, we want the best for her and we don't want her to go through any more unnecessary stress, but we absolutely cannot keep her anymore. Does anyone have experience with this kind of situation?

Thank you so much.

My first question would be is finances the only reason you no longer want to care for this cat.  And there is no fear in being honest.  If the cat is just too much for you, and her behaviors make her more of a burden than a joy, its okay to say so.  If it the amount of money you have to spend on getting her groomed by the vet, I think we should talk about that first.  Most of us here have, or have had, at least one rescue cat... and I bet there are a few people here who have experienced some of the behaiors you are going through and maybe we can help  you and your cat get to a happy place that can make this placement work.

In answer to your question, I have no first hand knowledge of any such rescue organizations.  All the rescues I know of are so full of perfectly adoptable animals they would not touch this case.  My thoughts would be that you look into a rescue group devoted to Maine coons and tell them your story.

While we wait on others to chime in, please feel free to add more info, like how old your cat is, what her name is, whether she is spayed, what types of behaviors you are seeing, whether you have other cats, and or dogs, kids, hamsters, whatever, is she a strictly indoor kitty, what kinds of things set her off.  Stuff like that.

Welcome to the cat site, and good luck in a peaceful resolution to your issues with this cat!

Thank you for your response. Of course it is not always easy caring for her, but our declining financial situation is truly the straw that breaks the camels back right now. $400 vet bills plus her monthly refills on the medication the vet put her on has crippled us financially and we are starting to go without necessities like food because of it.

Her name is Hazel, and she is a 6 year old Maine Coon. We have had other rescue cats before, but none of them were such severe cases like Hazel. To give you a little background on the information we found out about her, she had apparently started out living in a college dorm. We spoke to an expert years ago who thinks that is where her abuse began, and she may also have been subjected to exposure to drugs. She was rehomed several times after that, on one occasion living on a farm where she was rehomed for killing chickens.

Some of her good and bad behaviors include:

Bad behaviors:

- hairballs and frequent vomiting (she gets matted up fur because she won't let anyone groom her and eats her fur. this is the reason we have to bring her in for grooming so often. she won't care for her own fur.)
- refusal to allow us to groom her (she attacks people with biting, scratching, and hissing which is why the vet has to sedate her.)

- random unexplained fits of hissing, growling, or lashing out when she was previously calm (for example, sometimes she will lay down at our feet when we are watching TV, and all of a sudden she will lash out and attack us and run without us provoking her at all. you don't even have to be looking at her for her to do this. she does not draw blood anymore, but she did when we first got her.) (she also goes off and hides under the bed or in other places where we hear her growling to herself when the other cats are not around and we have not made any contact with her, and other strange aggressive behaviors like this.)

- memory loss: she forgets what she is doing, or if she has lashed out about 10 seconds after it occurs and switches between extremes of calm and anger quickly.

- neglecting her own coat of fur: she won't groom herself

- bullying our other cats: she attacks them at random

- territorial

- trust issues: she will come up to us and ask to be pet, and we pet her gently but after a few minutes she will lash out at us so we have to be careful with every contact

- stealing: she will often steal things and hide them from us, (such as socks and small objects,) and when we take them back without confronting her she will lash out at us if she sees us take it away. We suspect this is because she is possessive.

- howling: immediately after we go to bed at night, she wanders around the house howling and chirping. We were worried she might have been in pain once so we took her to the vet, and the vet told us it was because she forgot where we were. Now we call for her at night when she howls but she still does not stop howling at night.

- running away: when we open any doors in the house she will bolt out of them and hiss and we have to coax her back inside the house. she does this pretty frequently and she will wait right at the door for us when someone comes home so she can bolt.

- stalking guests: when we have a stranger in the house that Hazel has never met, she will stay at a distance and stalk them. If they try to go up to her, she will growl and hiss and t usually happens with male guests, and she typically hides when a female guest is over.

- burrying her food bowl: when Hazel is done eating, she will try to bury her food bowl. She scratches and knocks at it scattering food everywhere and making a loud thumping sound against the wall. We used to have a rug near her bowl that she would drag over it but we had to remove it.

Good behaviors:

- she will get in your lap and beg to be pet (for a short period of time)

- she will knead on you with her paws and purr, she also drools

- she will run up to you for affection if she hears her name called

- she loves to carry around her toys

- she sleeps most of the time

- she is litter box trained

- she uses a scratching post and does not destroy furniture

- she hunts and kills household pets and bugs

Most of her problems are because she does not trust people and she is afraid they will hurt her. We have absolutely never hurt Hazel, and when we first got her she was in much worse condition. We decided to keep her and rehabilitate her even though we did not have experience with difficult cats. She has improved a lot over the time we have had her, and we do have faith she can get better- but we also feel that we have no more we can offer her for her growth. Hazel needs to have special care in a special environment that we cannot provide anymore.

She is a very beautiful cat and we do believe she would function well in the home of an expert, probably with no other pets around.

Why does she need groomed so much? Can you groom her at home? Maybe she was abused at a groomers.

She needs grooming frequently because she does not take care of her fur. She won't let us groom her and attacks people who try. The vet has to get 4 people to restrain and sedate her before he can groom her unconscious. The sedative he uses is what costs us so much in addition to her medicine. About 2-3 times yearly she gets a potty shave for $75 (not including sedative) that prevents the matts and vomiting, but it only lasts a little while. We don't know if a groomer has abused her or not, but ours certainly doesn't.

Im so sorry about all of this. Its hard telling based on your post but how do you feel about her quality of life? Are there more good times than bad for her?

Im afraid that the grooming sessions are making this worse, thats why I asked. I know you said she has issues with having fur though so I understand why youre doing it. I hope Im not coming off as judgemental because I dont mean to be. Im just trying to get a feel for the situation. Will she wear a kitty tank top...to "hide" her fur and calm her down? Do you think shaving her fur makes her dislike it more?

Have you tried amitryptaline? Its an antidepressant/anxiety med. My cat has reacted anszingly well to it...better than I even imagined. And its very inexpensive... $7 for 6 weeks supply. Also, I know this would cost you more right now but have you gotten a 2nd opinion, maybe from a vet who specializes in cats? There are specialized cat clinics. Im wondering if her meds are causing the anxiety and outbursts. Some medications can. Also, another vet might be able to save you a lot of money. (I was paying nearly 2k a year to one vet and switched to another...he had a better treatment option that comes to under 100 dollars a year!

It seems your vet is just coping with the situation, rather than looking for what is causing it and helping her emotionally.

Im also afraid that any more homes will be detrimental to her. Thats why I asked about her quality of life. I hate to say it but Im thinking either staying with you or euthanasia may be the only options. A shelter will be very hard on her. But....please keep in mind that she can improve. Even the most abused animals can suddenly break through the trauma and become almost like new cats! Ive seen it happen.
Also, there are some great rescues out there who sometimes help people with some major problems like this. I dont mean giving her to them..but that they may be able to help you keep her..by figuring out where the behaviors are coming from. They can have access to amazing behaviorists and trainers. My advice would be to reach out to a few, pour your heart it, and see if they can help. Rescues dont just take in cats, they want to keep cats in good homes. They may be able to provide insight and a new set of eyes on whats going on.

Thank you so much for your detailed response. Hazel's behavior improves when she is shaved because her messy fur no longer makes her feel uncomfortable. I had not heard of amitryptaline before but I am definitely interested in trying it. Where do you get the medication? Does it have to be issued by a vet? Is it in capsule form or another form? I'm glad you have experience with this and that it works well for your cat.

I agree with you about the shelter and I will see if I can look into more places where we might find support for more cats like Hazel. Our resources just seem to be a bit limited and everywhere we've been so far we've not been able to find any help.

Wow, you really have gone through a lot in the last 5 years.  Hazel is a pretty kitty... Some of her behaviors remind me of Snowy, but much, more intense.

If you want to start sorting through behaviors while you are trying to find a rehoming option, then I would suggest you approach each issue individually, and then refer people back here to read this for a more indepth look at your cat.  And I would start with a question about grooming or psedation for vet visits.  In regards to Hazel's stress level, First question is if you have every used Feliway?  I have only tried the collar once during new cat introductions, but they have fragrance dispensers, and there are a few members here who swear by them as a calming aid for cats. Perhaps someone will give you more input on that in this thread.  As far as results, one of our cats did well on it, the other did not like it at all.  Before spending a fortune on it, I would definitely give it a test run. 

Do you live in an area that has mobile vets (or groomers)?  Has Hazel ever seen another vet besides the current one?  I assure you, I would NOT be able to spend that much money on grooming for as long as you have... but since this is the biggest problem, are there any other options you can explore?  If I got knocked out everytime I went to get my hair done, and then woke up bald, I wouldn't like it.  Snowy also hates anything that will make her look vulnerable in front of the other cats, and I can imagine that cut, regardless of how cute or beneficial it may be to us, probably makes her feel a little vulnerable.  Snowy will et me pick her up and love on her, but if any of the other cats are around to witness it, she will be ready to put my eyes out if I even act like it.  So, first, it would be nice if you could find a vet that came to you instead of stressing Hazel out going there.  Especially as many times has she has been rehomed.  There are a lot of other things I would like to ask about here, but don't want to waste your time if you are not open to discussing them.  How does she do traveling to the vet?  How does she do in a crate or carrier?  Is Hazel harness trained?  when they groom her do they put her completely out, or just drug her up?

You mentioned that you do have other cats, and that she bullies them.  Are there times that she is peaceable with them or seem to enjoy their company?  Do they hide from her or ignore her?  Does she ever play with them? Were the other cats there before or after Hazel?  How did introductions with them go?  I ask because I believe some of Hazel's unprovoked attacking issues are due to lack of socialization as a kitten, and part due to being insecure.  Her insecurity makes her defensive and trying to keep everyone at bay and high stress level due to "enemies being in her territory" and then also because she may want to be friends, but any efforts at playing with the other cats ends badly because she has never learned how to do so.  I know you already said she would do best in a home without other pets, and I agree with that, but if we were able to improve some of the behaviors, I think it would be best to keep Hazel with you - though if you are just beyond that point, I can't blame you.  you have done more than most would have!.

Hairballs.They do have hairball remedies, none of which my cat will have anything to do with, but she does like butter.  Butter seems to help keep the hairball issues under control because it helps to break them up so they pass out the other end instead of causing blockages and vomiting, etc.  Having hairballs, and an upset tummy will make her not want to groom herself very much... but she may do better with you cutting the mats out vs. the whole Vet Shave Thing.

Many of the other behaviors you mentioned sound like they are a combination of insecurity and territorial issues.  Making progress in small areas will help build her confidence to see bigger breakthrough in tougher areas.  If you end up keeping Hazel, there are many approaches to  curbing some of these behaviors.  Poor Hazel... and poor you too... Do you have one of those door mats that warns people about an attack cat?  I kid, though it is no joking matter.  Some cats can be quite ferocious and you certainly don't want friends and family getting bit!

Amitryptaline is through the vet. However, with the experience you have going to the vet and them being very familiar with you all, I would imagine a simple phone call would get you the prescription for it. (So no paying for another exam) From there, I had to experiment some to find the right dosage. It calmed my cat done, helped hugely with territorial and anxiety issues, and with a couple of easy changes in the house as well (like giving him his very own space and litterbox)...he even stopped urinating outside the box. No growling and hissing at the other cats anymore either. He isnt zoned out...he just seems..relieved, calm, and happy.Its a typical tablet-type pill. It doesnt seem to taste too bad...my cat takes it easily. It took a few days or so to kick in and is given each evening. The vet writes the prescription for it but I can pick it up at my local human drugstore.

I agree with the above person about working through the issues seperatly. So many times, we get that "aha" moment where we find a way to help the animals. Sometimes we need a bit of a new perspective . I know its frustrating trying to find help but it is out there. Dont be afraid to try rescues or behaviorialists who are a little further away from you as well as posting here for advice on behavior/grooming. Hang in there, you are priceless for this kitty!

The fact that youve seen progress is amazing. You have hope and you can imagine more improvement. There may be a big breakthrough right around the corner. Im so glad you care about this special kitty.


Edit-Is there an Alley Cat Advocates in your area? May not be a typical resource for this but around here, they know a lot of people. Could be worth sending them an email/phone call