Trying to learn how to make my feral cat comfortable to be held and carried.

My feral has been with me for 10 months!   All is going great!  I have her sitting on my lap and constantly asking to be pet.  She meows for me, licks me and her toys, does not play with any toys just licks them like they are her babies (think she may have been a TNR mommy), eats and goes to the bathroom in front of me.  She almost dozes off to sleep in front of me.  She won't scratch or hiss at me anymore.  She is a total indoor cat and hasn't wanted to escape.  She seems completely happy indoors.

 I am trying to get her to be held and carried.  Holding is ok until I start to walk with her.  She basically starts to hyperventilate and uses all her limbs and nails to dig into me and try to jump off of me.  Two months ago, I  used a beach towel and wrapped her back legs and held her thru a whole vet visit.  I didn't know it would work but the beach towel did the trick. She is now frightened if I am carrying things that are towel or clothing like. I thought maybe I shouldn't try to walk around holding her with the beach towel wrapped around her back legs. So this past week I have been trying to carry her,  I wear thick clothing but she gets totally scared and wiggles and bounces off of me using her nails to catch onto anywhere on my body to jump off of.  I know she is just scared when she jumps off of me. The scratching is not mean it is just escaping off.   She just ends up hiding for a few hours each time I try to carry her a little. I have decided to not let her hide after each jump off and go directly to her hide out and pet her and talk to her nice.  She does not hiss or scratch me in her hideout.  She lets me pet her.  It is just the carrying she is scared of.  Any thoughts of how to do this carrying? Should I wrap her in a towel and walk around with her?   Oh and my feral always has to be pushed to the next thing or she ends up just hiding her whole life away and never getting over being scared.  

JoanneS said:

 
My feral has been with me for 10 months!   All is going great!  I have her sitting on my lap and constantly asking to be pet.  She meows for me, licks me and her toys, does not play with any toys just licks them like they are her babies (think she may have been a TNR mommy), eats and goes to the bathroom in front of me.  She almost dozes off to sleep in front of me.  She won't scratch or hiss at me anymore.  She is a total indoor cat and hasn't wanted to escape.  She seems completely happy indoors.

 I am trying to get her to be held and carried.  Holding is ok until I start to walk with her.  She basically starts to hyperventilate and uses all her limbs and nails to dig into me and try to jump off of me.  Two months ago, I  used a beach towel and wrapped her back legs and held her thru a whole vet visit.  I didn't know it would work but the beach towel did the trick. She is now frightened if I am carrying things that are towel or clothing like. I thought maybe I shouldn't try to walk around holding her with the beach towel wrapped around her back legs. So this past week I have been trying to carry her,  I wear thick clothing but she gets totally scared and wiggles and bounces off of me using her nails to catch onto anywhere on my body to jump off of.  I know she is just scared when she jumps off of me. The scratching is not mean it is just escaping off.   She just ends up hiding for a few hours each time I try to carry her a little. I have decided to not let her hide after each jump off and go directly to her hide out and pet her and talk to her nice.  She does not hiss or scratch me in her hideout.  She lets me pet her.  It is just the carrying she is scared of.  Any thoughts of how to do this carrying? Should I wrap her in a towel and walk around with her?   Oh and my feral always has to be pushed to the next thing or she ends up just hiding her whole life away and never getting over being scared.  

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Is there a reason you feel you must hold her?  One of the stray/ferals I brought into the house, hates to be held.  I can pick him up, but he squirms and jumps away as soon as he can.  He then hides for hours.  I have no need to hold him unless he needs to go to the vet and I need to get him into the carrier.  I have plans in place for that. 

Feral/semi- feral and strays turned feral often do not like to be picked up or held.  They see it as a way that you are confining them against their will.  Their instinct is to be able to escape  at all times.

One of my ferals that still lives outside, will sit on my lap for short periods.  Yet, if I try to pick him up or hold him he will go as stiff as a board and all claws come out.  I have found that when he is sitting on my lap, I will try to place my arms around him and pull him just a bit closer.  Yet, he hates it.  Most likely he will never learn to like it.

Unless you have a need to hold him to get him to the vet for weekly vet visits, I see no need to put her through the angst.  It makes her upset.  Instead I would work on activities that she likes.  Do you play with her?  Play therapy helps to build confidence in cats.  You can try the hunt catch kill eat groom sleep theory.  You really get the cat moving with a da bird wand toy or other wand toy or even a laser pointer.  Then after a nice long play session where she hunts, catches and kills, you offer her an extra special treat, snack or meal to satisfy the eat.  SHe will then groom herself and take a nap.  YOu can can this multiple times each day.

If you have trouble getting her into a carrier for vet visits, you can get a larger feeder and start to feed her in it.  Or you can get her moving with a laser pointer and try to have her run into the carrier that way. 

IF you use the towel trick, wrap her up to the chins alike a burrito...  Taht is the trick.   Wrapped up like this, they are helpless, and thus - cease resistance.

Now, to get her used to be carried around, you must do stepwise.   Just hold her, and release her....  Etc.   Do release her as latest as she begins wriggle, but preferably before that.

This way, she knows, its usually pleasandt, and always ends  as soon she got enough.

She is liking you, even loving.  With time she will come to the point to appreciate and like to be held and carried some, as long as you dont overdo it.  But it must be on her premises.

My experience is, its common for  bothe ex-semiferales and shy cats, they dont like to be carried.

You have so many ohter pleasures fo being together,    THIS moment you can abstain from, no?  Its a small price to pay.

Picking up and carrying cats is a BIG deal to them.  All of my strays and semi-feral cats allow me to hold and carry them, with the exception of the declawed cat that I trapped and is indoor only.  As much as she loves me she will never ever let me hold or carry her.  She's made it clear to me that there are no exceptions to this rule.

I acquiesce.

Thanks everyone.  My cat will not play.  You can wiggle anything in front of her and she does nothing.  She will only lick her mice and picks them up in her paw gently.  I believe she must have been a mommy.  All she wants to do is roll over on her side and have all day belly and neck rubs.  She is the most affectionate cat I have ever owned.  She runs to greet me and even meows to me.  She is constantly licking me after I pet her.  She never sickens from being pet.   I am not looking  to carry her around all the time.  It is traumatic to her.   I needed to take her to the vet 2 months ago.  The first time since her initial just caught visit 10 months ago. They would have had to sedate her like the first time, so I came up with the wrap her in the beach towel to get her in the carrier.  It worked and once released at the vets I had to catch her with the towel and held her close while the vet examined her.  Both the vet and I were very surprised this work.  She remembered all too well the feral cat climbing the wall hissing and trying to catch.  Like I said she is very different now very loving.  But not to strangers.  

So my problem is I have many friends and family that come over and sometimes she puts her self in a corner they can not avoid going through. She particularly loves to sit on the bottom step of my stairs and not move. It is then I have to pick her up and carry her somewhere else. She is still very frightened by strangers and I don't want anyone scratched.

On the whole, she is doing better than I could have ever expected.  She is getting used to one of my friends who can pet her and feed her by hand.  I just want to be able to pick her up to move her on rare occasions. But I find with her particular personality, I believe unless I try to pick her up daily and walk even if only 2 minutes a day that doing an occasional walk move will always cause her to hyperventilate.  Oh and good news today she slept in front of me!    It seems whenever I push her scared mode to disappear she ends up being calmer.  I always talk to her sing to her and stay very calm.  I try all new things for a short time at first.  Then I stop and give her constant petting and lovey words and sing.  All which seem to calm her incredibly.   

I was just wondering if anyone tried walking around with their feral wrapped in a beach towel and if it ended up making their cat even worse to pick up.  

JoanneS said:

 
Thanks everyone.  My cat will not play.  You can wiggle anything in front of her and she does nothing.  She will only lick her mice and picks them up in her paw gently.  I believe she must have been a mommy.  All she wants to do is roll over on her side and have all day belly and neck rubs.  She is the most affectionate cat I have ever owned.  She runs to greet me and even meows to me.  She is constantly licking me after I pet her.  She never sickens from being pet.   I am not looking  to carry her around all the time.  It is traumatic to her.   I needed to take her to the vet 2 months ago.  The first time since her initial just caught visit 10 months ago. They would have had to sedate her like the first time, so I came up with the wrap her in the beach towel to get her in the carrier.  It worked and once released at the vets I had to catch her with the towel and held her close while the vet examined her.  Both the vet and I were very surprised this work.  She remembered all too well the feral cat climbing the wall hissing and trying to catch.  Like I said she is very different now very loving.  But not to strangers.  

So my problem is I have many friends and family that come over and sometimes she puts her self in a corner they can not avoid going through. She particularly loves to sit on the bottom step of my stairs and not move. It is then I have to pick her up and carry her somewhere else. She is still very frightened by strangers and I don't want anyone scratched.

On the whole, she is doing better than I could have ever expected.  She is getting used to one of my friends who can pet her and feed her by hand.  I just want to be able to pick her up to move her on rare occasions. But I find with her particular personality, I believe unless I try to pick her up daily and walk even if only 2 minutes a day that doing an occasional walk move will always cause her to hyperventilate.  Oh and good news today she slept in front of me!    It seems whenever I push her scared mode to disappear she ends up being calmer.  I always talk to her sing to her and stay very calm.  I try all new things for a short time at first.  Then I stop and give her constant petting and lovey words and sing.  All which seem to calm her incredibly.   

I was just wondering if anyone tried walking around with their feral wrapped in a beach towel and if it ended up making their cat even worse to pick up.  

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That is a standard method of "breaking in" young kittens.  Works usually fine. You wander around, talking friendly, making sympathetic noises "crooning", singing some, half an hour, a full hour...  A couple of such sessions and its done.

I myself believe this trick can be tried with older cats too.

BUT its to get them socialized, used to humans, not really to get them used to be carried.

You talk about carrying only 2 minutes.  While its useful sometimes, for exampel at the vets, or at a show (our example was our shy stud not liking to be carried, whom participated in shows....),  usually you dont need two minutes.

To carry away her fffrom the steps to another room takes at most 30 seconds...

So, as said. Take it stepwise.  At first just a few seconds, put her down.   Another day, have her up 15 seconds, cuddling.  Put down immediately you notice she begins to protest.

You shall never get it into stage she must forcefully wriggle out, and definitely not, to scratch herself out with raw force.   If you are there, you know you held her way too long - you lost the task.

The training shall learn her, carrying is OK, as she can trust you not to overdo it. Never ever.

If she KNOWS she cant trust you with the carrying part, it becomes quadruple so difficult...

Why, our ex-stud did learned with time to appreciated cuddles while being carried.  He seldom sought after them, but once up and held, he showed clearly he was pleased.  But not very long.  After one minute or at most two, he wanted down again...

Another tip.  this cat, alike many ex-semiferales, isnt fond of being cuddled on the floor.  Its often easier to cuddle while the cat is on a chair or a sofa...

Hi Everyone!  It's my one year anniversary bringing in Baby Girl.  My feral cat isn't really feral anymore!  She is more affectionate than any cat I have ever owned!  I kiss her head all the time and she now allows me to carry her for short whiles and jumps in my lap constantly. I didn't use the wrapped towel approach to carry her.  I followed the pick her up and hold her for as long as she felt comfortable without her getting really upset.  One second  then 2 two seconds etc.  She is starting to play with floor toys but no wand toys yet. As for getting used to other people other than me, Baby Girl is starting to walk around with my neighbor in the room and lets her pet her and feed her by hand. So she is slowly getting used to at least one other person.

.   I believe everyone on this site helped me.  When I first brought her in a year ago, I really was not sure she would ever even like me.  She was truly wild like a raccoon when I brought her inside to live.  It took practically 6 months to get her to even look at me. I thought I was crazy keeping her inside and wondered if I was going to have to get used to living with a completely wild animal in my house.  I don't  believe I could have ever put her outside even if she never became domesticated.. It gets so cold where I live with deep snow at times.  

BabyGirl loves being with me constantly now.  She follows me around constantly always purring and rolling over for belly rubs and neck rubs.  The best advice was always coming from all the veteran feral owners who kept giving me the wise advice which was just " give her the time she needs to get used to you"..  It is now one year since I brought her in to live with me!  I brought a feral cat in that i had never seen living under my porch during the cold deep snow of last December.  I didn't even have a relationship with her.  I just saw cat prints in the snow and being a past cat owner I couldn't bear the thought of a cat dying under my porch. I went out bought a Have a Heart Trap.  Everyone thought I was crazy and perhaps I was.  But I have no regrets.  It was hard especially the first 6 months but I would do it all over again.  Hugs to everyone and their cats!  Hoping everyone enjoys the holiday season!  

Congratulations, and thank you so much for sharing such a lovely pussycat story.