All this afternoon I have been reading locked threads. Why were these threads locked? Out of respect of the passed kitten, locked by the staff members. Many of these end with the guardian of the passed kitten saying that this experience has discouraged them from fostering kittens, for fear of losing them like they had already.
Losing a kitten makes you a better foster/forever parent.
My reasoning for believing this is simple. If you posted what worried you about your kitten, you almost definitely received information regarding why or why not you should be worried. You know what to be worried about, and what not to be worried about. You know 3 weeks is an important point in a kitten's life, and you know that kittens need heat to regulate their body temperatures for the beginning of their lives. You know how to pick KMR and when to contact a vet. These individual experiences may be shared by people, but only YOU are a combination of your knowledge. There is no person in the world who knows exactly the same things as you. You have learned so much.
I understand the pain of losing a kitten/adult cat very well. It is so hard to let go, and much of the time we try to forget about them completely. Ignore any pictures of them, try to distract ourselves. I have personally found this is a bad thing to do and that it's more beneficial to actually immerse yourself in the memories. Let yourself go. Cry as much as you need. Losing a fur baby is just as important as losing a child, as these bundles of love are our children. Look through every picture you have. Remember all the lovely times you had together. Remember when kitty first purred at you. Kitty's favorite toy. Frame a picture of your kitty. Grieve profusely and move on, but don't forget.
"I feel like I'm betraying my old cat by taking in another."
This paragraph is for if you brought in a stray/feral/orphan. They were saved by you. Yes, they passed, but they passed knowing you were caring for them, rather than out alone in the rain, freezing to death while people on the sidewalk just walked by. Think of little spirit kitty coming back over the rainbow bridge to gather up all the stray kitties and say "Hey, I know a great place for you."
This paragraph is for if you adopted a domesticated cat, or otherwise. Again, they were saved by you. Instead of going on the street because they were unable to be cared for by a previous owner, you cared for them. The same principles apply as in the first paragraph. They died knowing you loved them.
"I couldn't take care of the first, I'll never succeed with the second."
If you believe in fate, it was fate that you couldn't save the first kitten. If you don't, it was probably genetics, disease, or something out of your control. For example, flip a coin. Say heads = death, tails = life. There is a 50% chance of either outcome. Flip the coin again. The chances of heads-heads are 25%. The chances of tails-tails are 25%. The chances of heads-tails or tails-heads is 50%. The chance of losing the second kitten doesn't mathematically depend on the first, but the chances of both dying in the sense of probability is only 25%.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT GIVE UP ON A KITTEN BECAUSE A PREVIOUS MISHAP. THIS KITTEN DESERVES A LIFE JUST AS MUCH AS THE ONE BEFORE.
Thank you.
Losing a kitten makes you a better foster/forever parent.
My reasoning for believing this is simple. If you posted what worried you about your kitten, you almost definitely received information regarding why or why not you should be worried. You know what to be worried about, and what not to be worried about. You know 3 weeks is an important point in a kitten's life, and you know that kittens need heat to regulate their body temperatures for the beginning of their lives. You know how to pick KMR and when to contact a vet. These individual experiences may be shared by people, but only YOU are a combination of your knowledge. There is no person in the world who knows exactly the same things as you. You have learned so much.
I understand the pain of losing a kitten/adult cat very well. It is so hard to let go, and much of the time we try to forget about them completely. Ignore any pictures of them, try to distract ourselves. I have personally found this is a bad thing to do and that it's more beneficial to actually immerse yourself in the memories. Let yourself go. Cry as much as you need. Losing a fur baby is just as important as losing a child, as these bundles of love are our children. Look through every picture you have. Remember all the lovely times you had together. Remember when kitty first purred at you. Kitty's favorite toy. Frame a picture of your kitty. Grieve profusely and move on, but don't forget.
"I feel like I'm betraying my old cat by taking in another."
This paragraph is for if you brought in a stray/feral/orphan. They were saved by you. Yes, they passed, but they passed knowing you were caring for them, rather than out alone in the rain, freezing to death while people on the sidewalk just walked by. Think of little spirit kitty coming back over the rainbow bridge to gather up all the stray kitties and say "Hey, I know a great place for you."
This paragraph is for if you adopted a domesticated cat, or otherwise. Again, they were saved by you. Instead of going on the street because they were unable to be cared for by a previous owner, you cared for them. The same principles apply as in the first paragraph. They died knowing you loved them.
"I couldn't take care of the first, I'll never succeed with the second."
If you believe in fate, it was fate that you couldn't save the first kitten. If you don't, it was probably genetics, disease, or something out of your control. For example, flip a coin. Say heads = death, tails = life. There is a 50% chance of either outcome. Flip the coin again. The chances of heads-heads are 25%. The chances of tails-tails are 25%. The chances of heads-tails or tails-heads is 50%. The chance of losing the second kitten doesn't mathematically depend on the first, but the chances of both dying in the sense of probability is only 25%.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT GIVE UP ON A KITTEN BECAUSE A PREVIOUS MISHAP. THIS KITTEN DESERVES A LIFE JUST AS MUCH AS THE ONE BEFORE.
Thank you.
