Hello, I'm Carol and I'm new to the threads, so I'll just give some basic info on why I need some help or advice with my two boys .My husband and I live in a small apartment divided into two rooms. The living room is small and is directly connected to a kitchen which leads to our bedroom, the biggest room in the whole place. The bedroom has a small bathroom in the side of the room, and that's pretty much our living space lol
We have two cats, Romeo (Korat), and Big Papa (Russian Blue). Both are fixed and up to date with the vet.
Romie
Big Papa
Romie is the resident cat and is almost two years old. We adopted Romie last year from an adoption program and he's been with us ever since. Romie is very sweet and rambunctious, but also very dominant. He has Pica, and he lets everyone know about it. Romie is typically my husband's cat and favors him more, but still comes to me for petting and attention. Big Papa is more my cat and comes to me more.
About two weeks ago, someone dropped off this huge stray outside my apartment, and naturally I started to get to know the big hunk. I just fell in love with Big Papa, as I've come to call him. He was abandoned on the curb as an intact male with a lot of scars and past bite wounds from male on male fights over queens in heat. He's about four years oId. I figured he would be the aggressive type once we got him in the house, but instead, he's docile and will retreat most of the time when Romie tries to start a fight. He's three times Romie's size and is a healthy 15 pounds of muscle. He'll bite back and chase Romie sometimes, but mostly he retreats. About two days after I got him in the house, we got him neutered and he's calmed down even more since then. He's a very sweet baby that just wants lovins. He does have a touch of petting aggression if you keep touching him when he's done with the attention, but we've learned to respect his boundaries. The vet checkup proved that all the scars on his back are sensitive and some nerve damage is apparent there, so we avoid that area altogether. He has a clean bill of health. Now onto the problem...
About a week after Big Papa was neutered and started to mega chill out in the house, Romie started showing huge territorial aggression signs. Big Papa has three places that he calls his own in the house; on the floor in front of the fridge, on the loveseat, and on the third tier of their cat tree. No matter where Big Papa claims territory, Romie just wont have it. He'll go and seek Papa out, then bite his back feet, yell in his face, dance around him until Big Papa makes a move or Romie just pounces on his neck and goes to town. Then they'll chase each other through the house, and it doesnt stop until I separate them in rooms. When it started, I caught Romie either blocking Papa's way to the front room litter box, or bullying him away from it. I tried to redirect him with play, but then Papa started peeing and pooping behind my couch, and I know that's a cry for help. I have a box in the bathroom and in the front room, which seems to be working a little. Big Papa isn't going on my floor or towels anymore at least! Because our place is so small there's no where else to put another box.
At the very moment we're trying scent/site swapping, and everything is great with them and food. The pet gate is where they eat, one on either side because Romie is obsessed with kibble. He came to us like that. They eat within eye view of each other and have no issue with it. The problem arises when they're in the same room together. Romie just can't help himself and he bullies Big Papa immediately! I'm getting frustrated with Romie, but I'm not being mean to either one of them. We tried playing with them in the same room last night and it was going well until Romie punished Papa for trying to play with a certain toy and then under the bed the big boy went. They're both good cats, I know they are. I've tried everything; making more room for them, more things to climb and perch on, i've bought new toys, rubbed them down with a towel and rubbed each other with the towel to swap scents,ect. All to no avail. I've gone as far as to try clicker training to get them to see that being around each other is a good and positive thing, but Romie isn't deterred for long.
Now, my husband works part time and goes to college, so he's barely home long enough to do much. I'm disabled and stay home all day and night with the cats, but I'm limited so it's not an easy task. My question is this~
How can I get Romie and Big Papa to coexist in a friendly manner without Romie constantly trying to pick a fight with Papa and chasing him out of the front room litter box? I've owned cats all my life, especially rescued strays, and I've got to admit...these two have me stumped.
Thank you and God bless~!
We have two cats, Romeo (Korat), and Big Papa (Russian Blue). Both are fixed and up to date with the vet.
Romie is the resident cat and is almost two years old. We adopted Romie last year from an adoption program and he's been with us ever since. Romie is very sweet and rambunctious, but also very dominant. He has Pica, and he lets everyone know about it. Romie is typically my husband's cat and favors him more, but still comes to me for petting and attention. Big Papa is more my cat and comes to me more.
About two weeks ago, someone dropped off this huge stray outside my apartment, and naturally I started to get to know the big hunk. I just fell in love with Big Papa, as I've come to call him. He was abandoned on the curb as an intact male with a lot of scars and past bite wounds from male on male fights over queens in heat. He's about four years oId. I figured he would be the aggressive type once we got him in the house, but instead, he's docile and will retreat most of the time when Romie tries to start a fight. He's three times Romie's size and is a healthy 15 pounds of muscle. He'll bite back and chase Romie sometimes, but mostly he retreats. About two days after I got him in the house, we got him neutered and he's calmed down even more since then. He's a very sweet baby that just wants lovins. He does have a touch of petting aggression if you keep touching him when he's done with the attention, but we've learned to respect his boundaries. The vet checkup proved that all the scars on his back are sensitive and some nerve damage is apparent there, so we avoid that area altogether. He has a clean bill of health. Now onto the problem...
About a week after Big Papa was neutered and started to mega chill out in the house, Romie started showing huge territorial aggression signs. Big Papa has three places that he calls his own in the house; on the floor in front of the fridge, on the loveseat, and on the third tier of their cat tree. No matter where Big Papa claims territory, Romie just wont have it. He'll go and seek Papa out, then bite his back feet, yell in his face, dance around him until Big Papa makes a move or Romie just pounces on his neck and goes to town. Then they'll chase each other through the house, and it doesnt stop until I separate them in rooms. When it started, I caught Romie either blocking Papa's way to the front room litter box, or bullying him away from it. I tried to redirect him with play, but then Papa started peeing and pooping behind my couch, and I know that's a cry for help. I have a box in the bathroom and in the front room, which seems to be working a little. Big Papa isn't going on my floor or towels anymore at least! Because our place is so small there's no where else to put another box.
At the very moment we're trying scent/site swapping, and everything is great with them and food. The pet gate is where they eat, one on either side because Romie is obsessed with kibble. He came to us like that. They eat within eye view of each other and have no issue with it. The problem arises when they're in the same room together. Romie just can't help himself and he bullies Big Papa immediately! I'm getting frustrated with Romie, but I'm not being mean to either one of them. We tried playing with them in the same room last night and it was going well until Romie punished Papa for trying to play with a certain toy and then under the bed the big boy went. They're both good cats, I know they are. I've tried everything; making more room for them, more things to climb and perch on, i've bought new toys, rubbed them down with a towel and rubbed each other with the towel to swap scents,ect. All to no avail. I've gone as far as to try clicker training to get them to see that being around each other is a good and positive thing, but Romie isn't deterred for long.
Now, my husband works part time and goes to college, so he's barely home long enough to do much. I'm disabled and stay home all day and night with the cats, but I'm limited so it's not an easy task. My question is this~
How can I get Romie and Big Papa to coexist in a friendly manner without Romie constantly trying to pick a fight with Papa and chasing him out of the front room litter box? I've owned cats all my life, especially rescued strays, and I've got to admit...these two have me stumped.
Thank you and God bless~!
