Not a stray

I didn't know where to put this... My cat is not a stray. He's an indoor/outdoor cat. He absolutely hates being cooped up and will fight most strenuously if I try (loud constant mewing and poop everywhere). A lady(lets call her Jolene) a few houses down thought he was a stray and fed him. This was 18 months ago. A few months after she did that she found out he was mine. Now here's my issue. He won't leave her alone. Jolene loves animals and is super nice to my cat when it's over, but she is frequently at my front door with concerns about my cat. We feed him high quality whiskas (28.5% protien). He's fixed. He gets his shots/vet visits/medication. And I've told her all of this. She insists he needs better food. She's always worried about whether or not my kids and dog are bothering him. She's driving me a little crazy. Tonight she dropped off cans of wetfood for me to feed him so that he comes home more often. I've never been so stressed owning a cat! What can I do? Is this normal neighborly behavior? I don't mind Jolene letting him in. I just mind that it's stressing her out and she in turn is stressing me out!

Okay, someone told me people who care about their cats keep them indoors and that cats don't poop out of anger.. true? 

Do you think Jolene wants your cat?  Does your cat spend much time indoors? Do you know how much time he spends indoors at Jolenes?  Sometimes you just have those neighbors who try to tell everyone how to parent their children, and when you have enough, you tell your children not to go there anymore.  I guess Jolene is that way with pets.  And sometimes pets pick their owners.  We love them, we feed them, we care for them, and then they bond with someone else... IDK... it happens.

Oh, and yes she doesn't want him. She keeps telling me she doesn't want a cat. 

Sounds to me like she's lying to herself. 

Well if you think she doesn't want him, but you two seem to have a comfortable relationship where you can talk to each other, I would just find a nice way to tell her to quit spoiling him and he will quit hanging out so much.  I'm not sure what the laws are where you live, but where I live, the city accepts that it is a cat's nature to roam and there are no leash laws where cats are concerned.  In other words, they will not respond to cat calls unless the cat is in imminent danger and then its unlikely they will respond.

Some jurisdictions are not like that though and you must have your animals tagged and confined.  Cats have ways of getting what they want from people.  My ragdoll can convince anyone she is starving even when she has just been fed, if she thinks she can get some temptations out of the deal.    Have you gotten to witness how the cat acts around her when she doesn't know you are there? I mean does she outside their bedroom window and cry all night or has your neighbor given you reasons why she is so concerned?

I don't think she has good reason, but she's a little over concerned about animals, which is sweet really. For an idea, she also gets medicine from a local animal shelter for sick squirrels. 

I think we can talk it out... She just makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong all the time. I've never been so stressed about owning a cat. I'm feeding the kitty then cans of food she's given me and Turbo (my kitty) is home alot more and meowing at me for more. He just wants more of the yummy canned food to be honest. I see why she gets annoyed.. But this is also why I don't spoil him in the first place. Thanks for replying! 

The only real solution is to keep him inside.  I know he loves it outside, but I doubt he will quit going to her home.  Is there a way you can build an enclosure for him in your yard that would keep him from wandering, but still allow him to be outside? 

I am sure she really likes your cat, but knows he belongs to you.  She is confused as the cat comes to her for food and attention or maybe just food!  Some cats just love to eat and he might prefer the food she is giving him. 

I would be concerned about him getting over fed.  You might need to speak with her about not feeding him.  As long as he is eating well at your home, there is no need for him to get fed by her.  It may solve the problem if she stops feeding him.