Older cat and kitten issues!

Hi all! 

I am here to hopefully get a little advice regarding my little kitties!

We have a 4 year old cat, Cleo, who is very independent and a little standoff-ish at times! She only likes cuddles on her terms (think this is because her Mummy and Daddy were unsociable farm cats!). However, we got another kitten just over 8 weeks ago, Winnie, she's 16 weeks old now. This is the first time we have introduced cats and Cleo was our first cat so we are cat behaviour newbies really! I did as much research as I could on the best way to introduce them. We did scent swapping, sniffing through doors for a few days, then eating on either side, then with the door cracked slightly etc.

Anyway, we're at a point now where they will sit together and drink their cat milk but as soon as Winnie has finished, there will be 5 minutes of calm and niceness and then she unleashes hell on Cleo. Winnie is relentless with jumping all over her and it's really making poor Cleo miserable, she's still nervous to walk past the room we keep Winnie. She's also lost a lot of interest in playing with any of her toys with us. She'll still take treats, have cuddles when she wants and come in and out but she's definitely more on edge. When they are together, Winnie is constantly trying to chase and bite Cleo and just does not give her a break until we have to take her out the room and then we feel like we've left it on a bad note  

We're not really sure what to do next regarding trying to get them past this point. Should I be correcting Winnie's behaviour? I feel like she's just being a kitten and I thought maybe once Cleo had bopped her on the head a few times she'd get the message and mind her manners a little better but maybe that's wishful thinking with a kitten! 

So basically, any advice regarding the next step to take to try and create a more harmonious kitty household would be very much appreciated! 

Thank you!

It appears as though you have rushed the process.  Once you hit a step and there is chasing, growling, fighting, etc.. you need to go back to the previous step.  Each step can take weeks to months.  Most of us humans rush the process and end of having to start again.  It is just too soon for the cats to be out and about together.  Yes it is a pain.  For right now the cats should not be out and about together.  I would move back to feeding them on either side of a door.  Yet this time use a baby gate.  If there are issues with any hissing, growling, posturing, or other unpleasantries put a sheet or towel over the gate until all of the unwanted behaviors stop.  Realize this can take a long time.  If you continually bring the cats out and about together and they chase, fight, hiss, yowl, etc.. then the process is not working.  The key is to take it slow and not move to the next step until you have many days of only good behavior. 

Cats can take weeks to months to a year to learn to coexist.  My two took exactly one year.  Just try to be very patient.  You do not want full blown attacks.  Just step back and restart the process.  A baby gate or screen door is really helpful.  I used a cheap wooden screen door from Lowes and put it in the door way of the room where my new cat stayed.  I attached it with cheap tension rods so I didn't have to deface the door.  This allowed the new cat the ability to see, hear and smell all that was going on in the house.  It was also the perfect place to do the feedings.  It was used only when I was home and could supervise as the screen was a bit flimsy.  I kept the baby gate in the door way for extra protection.  I have a picture of my set up if you'd like to see it.  Also be sure to allow the new kitty time out and about to explore.  Just put the resident kitty away for bit in a different room. 

Thank you so much for the detailed reply!

I thought that might be the case  

We shall go back to the bit where they are happy and fine together, which is having their milk and then we'll leave it there and separate them, end things on a good note!

Neither of them growl or anything while they're having a treat of their milk together so when would I know that it's ok to move onto the next step?

I think Cleo would be absolutely fine if Winnie just wouldn't jump all over her She's tolerated quite a lot from her quite well and she's even gone up to her in a non-aggressive way and had a sniff and she's laid down and slept while Winnie has been in the room but then as soon as the kitten starts..being a kitten, Cleo hates it and they have a right ruckus Is part of moving forward going to be waiting for the kitten get a little older and calmer?

What kind of milk are you giving them?  Regular milk is very hard for cats to digest, yet I know there are other kinds of milk that are better suited for cats.  When doing the introduction process it is best to have them eating behind the door not just a snack.  You want them to associate something good so if not a meal, then a very special snack that will take them awhile to eat.  Here is a really great video that details the introduction process.

It's proper cat milk No regular milk for these kitties! We will try and let them have their dinner at the same time then What would you say is a rough time frame of how long each part of the process would take? So like when should we attempt to put them together again?

KiwiBagels said:

 
It's proper cat milk No regular milk for these kitties! We will try and let them have their dinner at the same time then What would you say is a rough time frame of how long each part of the process would take? So like when should we attempt to put them together again?

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Unfortunately for each cat it is different.  You want them to be able to eat on either side of a closed door or gate without any growling, hissing, posturing, chasing, etc.  You want them to be calm.  This may take awhile.  After they can each eat without being freaked out, you can move the gate slightly to the side.  Always supervise.  Next you can try having them in the same room, but keeping a watchful eye for activities that lead to fighting.  Some hissing ( as a warning) is ok.  Chasing is ok as long as the other cat is not greatly traumatized.  Also you don't want the chasing to lead to fighting.  Watch the posture, ear position and tail position.  If you see ears going back or flattening as well as a swishing tail, these are warning signs.  Separate the cats.  I would always try to end each session together on a positive note.

When I went through this with my two cats, after they could eat near each other, it was time for out and about.  It was hard.  I had to go back wards a bit and I used a large dog crate to help.  I put one cat inside.  At first I would cover it on 3 sides with a sheet.  I then would offer plain cooked chicken as rewards.  The cats loved it.  I also used a long shoe lace to dangle inside the cat to get the cat interested and then also pull it around for the cat that was outside the crate.  Next more chicken!!  I did this at least 3x each day.  The sessions first started off at only 2 minutes.  I wanted to end the session while everyone was happy.  After a few days we were up to 5 minutes and then 10-15 minutes.  The next step was then to have them in a small room together.  It was less intimidating than full run of the house. 

Just remember if you move to the next step and there is chasing that leads to fighting, yowling, growling or all out fights you need to go back and stay at the previous step. 

Once my cats were out and about together, I found that my new cat preferred being low to the ground and on the floor only.  My resident cat was a tree dweller and loved to be up high.  I had several cat condos that helped.  The resident cat would stay up all day and the new cat preferred the floor.  It helped to give them their each space and territory.

Okay. Yeah their chasing always leads to fights and growling at the moment. We will try the trick with the crate and chicken! The only place I can see it getting tricky is when we take Winnie out for her walks in the garden, Cleo is usually out there and although we don't let Winnie chase her, she definitely wants to and when Cleo is in the area, Winnie isn't interested in anything else! 

I have a 4 year old girl and a 5 month old boy. I thought neutering him would help but it did not.

Vet suggested Feliway room plug ins. I guess it gives off some sort of hormone that cats give off

to calm them down? I have one upstairs and one downstairs. Seemed to working up until I had to

take them off wet food because Oswald has an allergy. I am currently trying new wet foods, but

4 year old is not happy and acting out again. Google Feliway for Multi Cats. You can get it at Pet Smart.

Hi all. I'm asking now whether we should consider getting another kitten.

We have to keep Winnie upstairs most of the time at the moment because otherwise her and the dog cause absolute mayhem downstairs (we're in the process of training the dog to be calm around her but it's hard for a terrier with their chasing instincts). However, as she's getting older, she's obviously more and more difficult to contain. We've stopped letting her pester our older cat and just tried them having "quality time" together but as soon as it's over or our older cat moves, she wants to jump all over her. We have multiple play sessions with her during the day and take her outside on her lead to burn off some energy but it never seems to be enough. I have to shut her in a room to get anything done during the day, which makes me sad for her. 

I cannot stress enough that we are at the limit of what we can do in regards to giving her attention. I am at home all day because I suffer with a chronic illness and she gets attention all day (apart from her naps or when she has to be locked in a room because i HAVE to do other stuff). Everything I've read online about kittens pestering older cats or having excess energy suggests another kitten. We could only do this if we were sure it would take a little of the stress off of us and our existing cat. 

I start studying again in October and I'm worried if she's still like this i'm not going to be able to get anything done! Also, she's due to be spayed in September, once she's 5 months and she'll be allowed outside on her own once she's all healed up, however, if she's still terrorising our existing cat, I can't see how we can let her out. 

Please help! Should we wait until she's 6 months and see if she calms down a little or should we be seriously considering getting another around her age?

Personally I'm for another kitten as it is likely to do the trick.. but you will end up with two manic little fur-balls instead of one.  It's just that they will hopefully direct all that mania at each other.

Let's see what others have to say..