Parents won't believe me that they shouldn't rub their belly :(

mrcloverthecat

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My cat is extremely trusting of me, so sometimes when he's sitting next to me on the couch, he'll flip over and start to sleep belly-up. Then my parents will come over with their dog filter lenses and start rubbing his belly. He bats their arms away with his legs; he even bit my dad a few times. But my dad, having lived with animals all his life (but never thinking too hard about their behavior, or even reading any articles on animal behavior) says that it's their way of playing, and then they'll bight each other and chase each other and hit each other. My mom believes him because he usually runs away when he's sleepy, but they woke him up when he was sleeping so he's too tired to get up and run.

No matter how many times I tell my parents something about cat behavior, they'll say it's not true and then come up with a huge lie, or some misconception they've led themselves to believe (despite having also created it).

What can I do? I feel so terrible for him, being put through all this stress. I would even switch places with him if I could 
 

Draco

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that's a toughie, considering they are your parents. I find most adults are set in their ways when growing up with animals.. they feel its the only way.

I am not sure what to say to help, other than let them realize if they want to get bitten, they need to leave the belly alone
 
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mrcloverthecat

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that's a toughie, considering they are your parents. I find most adults are set in their ways when growing up with animals.. they feel its the only way.

I am not sure what to say to help, other than let them realize if they want to get bitten, they need to leave the belly alone
Thank you; I think it should help.

Sorry if I seemed too rant -y, I just didn't want Clover stressing out so much
 

Draco

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I completely understand! You are allowed to rant and express your feelings and concerns :)

It took a while for my parents to realize that my cats were not dogs and they can't treat them that way. You are not the only one!
 

Kat0121

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My cat is extremely trusting of me, so sometimes when he's sitting next to me on the couch, he'll flip over and start to sleep belly-up. Then my parents will come over with their dog filter lenses and start rubbing his belly. He bats their arms away with his legs; he even bit my dad a few times. But my dad, having lived with animals all his life (but never thinking too hard about their behavior, or even reading any articles on animal behavior) says that it's their way of playing, and then they'll bight each other and chase each other and hit each other. My mom believes him because he usually runs away when he's sleepy, but they woke him up when he was sleeping so he's too tired to get up and run.

No matter how many times I tell my parents something about cat behavior, they'll say it's not true and then come up with a huge lie, or some misconception they've led themselves to believe (despite having also created it).

What can I do? I feel so terrible for him, being put through all this stress. I would even switch places with him if I could 
I understand how you feel. I understand how he feels too though. Those bellies are so cute and soft that it takes extreme willpower not to rub them. I'd just ask him if he'd like someone to do that to him every time he tried to relax. He probably wouldn't. I'd just explain that I understand why he'd WANT to rub the belly. Everyone does but the cat doesn't like it and if he does it anyway, the cat could lose trust in him and I doubt he wants that. Being shown the belly is a big sign of trust on the cat's part. That's not something I'd want to lose after taking the time and putting in the effort to gain it in the first place. The cat's feelings deserve to be respected too. Very few cats like having their bellies rubbed. 
 

blackangel

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I didn't know they didn't like it!!! I've been rubbin' the CRAP out of Frost's belly! :jaw:

Anyway, those bellies are so cute it's hard to resist. I'm not sure how you can get him to realize the cat doesn't like it. Humans think all animals like a belly rub for some reason.


On a funnier note- I do hubby the same way... Don't think he likes it much either. :lol3:
 

miannorvy

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I had one cat over the years who liked belly rubs "Autum" and I have had several. My son has one now and she is almost one year old now and is the most lovey kitty. Chleo loves belly rubs and lays belly up on your lap or tummy for them.
 

blackangel

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Maybe it varies from cat to cat. Frost doesn't "hate" it, but he doesn't know how to take it so to speak. He nibbles at my fingers and grabs my hand. It's kinda cute, but after reading that it's a trust thing on so many sites, I e stopped doing that and I'll rub his side or something.

That belly is cute and tempting though. :lol3:

 

itsybitsy15

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I ONLY rub the belly if it Is offered to me.

My fat cat likes it but only when he wants it. And radar doesnt care.
 

Kat0121

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That is a very adorable belly. 
  Showing the belly is a huge sign of trust as the belly is a very vulnerable area. I will give a little tickle to the belly area when is is shown to me but not a real rub. A rub usually gets a swat. It does depend on the cat. Some like it, some don't but I think most don't. if you have a cat that does like it, you're lucky. Give that belly a rub for me. 


Cat bellies are also so much cuter than dog bellies so I want to rub them more but I try very hard to respect their wishes. 
 

ermentrude

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I have had 2 cats that actively seek out belly rubs and two that just aren't into it. I don't think there is a hard and fast rule that all cats hate it or don't. But if they're nipping or swatting its a pretty good sign. For the OP - you know your parents best, what is something that really annoys them? Try to draw a comparison with the belly rub for your cat, she's just not a belly rubbing cat. That may work.
 

cicoccabim

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I have the same problem with my dad. He won´t leave my cat alone- and, ignoring wildly lashing tail ends up with her biting him. So, I´ve made a super highway where she can get away from him, he can´t reach her, and she still have the control over the situation. But he is here once in a while. Not very often. But I know how it feels....... 
When she is at the top none can reach her! and she has a perfect wiew of the garden. 
 

jade14

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My boy doesn't particularly like belly rubs but he likes belly tickles, if I tickle his lower belly his eyes start to close and sometimes he will fall asleep! (Unless he is in crazy mode.. then he attacks!)
 

Draco

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I have the same problem with my dad. He won´t leave my cat alone- and, ignoring wildly lashing tail ends up with her biting him. So, I´ve made a super highway where she can get away from him, he can´t reach her, and she still have the control over the situation. But he is here once in a while. Not very often. But I know how it feels....... 

When she is at the top none can reach her! and she has a perfect wiew of the garden. 
That... Is... AWESOME!
 

meowkittymeow

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I didn't know this was bad? Poptart lets me do it... though I notice only me, everyone else she gets up and leaves or swats. 
 

mani

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I didn't know this was bad? Poptart lets me do it... though I notice only me, everyone else she gets up and leaves or swats. 
      It's not necessarily bad.. we just need to read the signs.
 

losna

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@cicoccabim   That's an awesome highway. I've been planning to put shelves like that through y entire house for my kitties. I am slowly winning the battle against my husband for them.
And Sinbad seeking out belly rubs for himself:


As to the original question: Maybe have them read this thread? If they doubt your statements, maybe a bunch of cat people saying that belly rubs is a bad thing to do unless the cat likes it - and if the cat is biting/scratching, the cat does not like it.  Cats are not dogs, and treating them as though they are is very stressful for the cat.

I know how tough it can be to convince people who are insistent about things like this though. My grandmother was convinced that cats liked to smother babies to death when they slept, and nothing could convince her otherwise.
 
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