Introduction Got Messed Up Big Time... HELP!

platinumpreta

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I have Freya, a 7 year old tuxedo cat (spayed)  I got about three years ago. I was informed by the previous owner that she didn't get along with their cat (they did the 'throw them together and let them work it out' solution... WRONG WRONG WRONG!) when I adopted her. Within the past three years I've had to put her in a cat kennel three times, each time I left her there I would call to see how she was doing, if she was being aggressive, etc. and they would tell me she was not aggressive to the other cats, just a little grumpy. I was content with having one cat for a while since she is super sweet and well behaved, takes care of herself, so when I was going through college she was the perfect pet! 

I graduated a month ago and have found myself with more time than I can spare. Freya is a sweetheart but I found myself wanting to add another cat to the mix, one with proper introduction methods since I had been informed she isn't aggressive with others, just gets grumpy. Well two weeks ago someone plopped a 1 year old neutered male into my lap, whom I have named Jasper. He's still got the kitten energy in him but he's sweet and gets along well with other cats from what i was told. In fact, he really wants to see Freya and tries to meow at her/lay at the door when he knows she's there. 

My problem? I've been feeding them from the opposite sides of the door for two weeks, swapping socks with their scent, towels, switching rooms frequently through the day, etc. All seemed to be going mostly well, with Jasper sometimes sticking a paw under the door to reach Freya and her hissing at him a bit but moving on her way. When the paw thing became an issue I taped cardboard to the bottom of my doors so he cannot reach under there anymore. I even caught her laying in front of the door, still kind of grumpily meowing/rumbling in response to Jasper's meows but the fact she was laying there at all felt like a huge step in the right direction. 

But then bad luck struck. While trying to feed Jasper after setting out Freya's food he bolted out the door to see her and she freaked out. A fight didn't break out, but Freya was hissing and growling while Jasper stood there a short ways away before I snatched him up and threw him into his safe room. Since they finally saw each other face to face and it was a negative experience (coupled with the paw under the door thing bothering Freya in the past) I'm worried my chances of getting them to at least coexist is gone forever. I've already invested money in Jasper via taking him to the vet, buying him toys and necessities, etc. that I'm hesitant to get rid of him. 

There has been no outright snarling or fight attempts, or spraying on Freya's part or Jasper's. I'm a homebody so besides my 3 day a week job I'm always here and alone so doubt it's happening when I'm at work. Jasper's still in his safe room. 

Is all hope lost? How can I make this right again? 
 

Norachan

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It doesn't sound as if it's going that badly at all to me. Some cats just take a lot longer to adjust than others do and if Freya has been used to having the place all to herself for so long she's bound to take her time adjusting. A bit of hissing and growling is to be expected. A hiss is just a way of telling the other cat to back off a little. The fact that Jasper stood still when she hissed at him is a good sign. He was listening to her and giving her some space.

Two things that might help; have you got a Feliway diffuser? This is a plug in that mimics the smell a female cat gives off when she has kittens and cats find it very calming. You won't be able to smell it yourself, but it will put both of the cats at ease. Also, as they know the other cat is there now, how about rigging up a screen door so they can actually see each other? I think @ShadowsRescue  put up a temporary door inside her house so the cats could see each other without getting too close.

There are some other ideas in this article that you might find useful.

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/the-ultimate-yet-simplified-guide-to-introducing-cats

Don't give up. It took my cat Mia 6 months before she would allow any of the other cats in "her" room, but now she snuggles up with the rest of them without any trouble.
 

losna

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Setbacks happen with introductions. You haven't lost all chances of coexistence, don't worry! :)

Just keep doing what you're doing, incrementally upping their interactions as they seem comfortable and it should be ok. That sounded like a pretty decent first face to face meeting to me, actually, especially an unexpected one. Neither of them fled, and they didn't fight.
 
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platinumpreta

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It doesn't sound as if it's going that badly at all to me. Some cats just take a lot longer to adjust than others do and if Freya has been used to having the place all to herself for so long she's bound to take her time adjusting. A bit of hissing and growling is to be expected. A hiss is just a way of telling the other cat to back off a little. The fact that Jasper stood still when she hissed at him is a good sign. He was listening to her and giving her some space.

Two things that might help; have you got a Feliway diffuser? This is a plug in that mimics the smell a female cat gives off when she has kittens and cats find it very calming. You won't be able to smell it yourself, but it will put both of the cats at ease. Also, as they know the other cat is there now, how about rigging up a screen door so they can actually see each other? I think @ShadowsRescue  put up a temporary door inside her house so the cats could see each other without getting too close.

There are some other ideas in this article that you might find useful.

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/the-ultimate-yet-simplified-guide-to-introducing-cats

Don't give up. It took my cat Mia 6 months before she would allow any of the other cats in "her" room, but now she snuggles up with the rest of them without any trouble.
I actually heard about the Feliway diffuser today right after the incident but I wasn't sure how it worked. I found a store near me that sells it but it's closed because of the holiday. I'm hoping they'll be open tomorrow so I can get my hands on it as soon as possible. 

A part of me has always felt that the previous owner's assessment of her aggression was a little over the top. By the way they made it sound she was straight out of an episode of My Cat from Hell and I believed them until after talking to the kennel workers about how she handled the other cats since they would keep their cats  in an open room for exercise. I guess a part of me is just hoping that will continue to be the case. I adore Jasper but I've had Freya the longest and she's very close to my heart and I want to make sure she's as comfortable as possible. 

I'd really like to get a screen door but I might try a couple baby gates instead, I have limited funds and know I can borrow some from a friend. 

 
 

shadowsrescue

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The screen door set up was actually pretty cheap.  I bought a wooden screen door from Lowes for $20 and attached it to the door frame with 2-4 tension rods ($4).  I did place a baby gate in the door way for extra protection.  This set up was only used when I was home to supervise.  It allowed the cat in the room to be able to see, hear and smell the comings and goings in the house.  The cats could also safely watch each other and sniff each other too. 

It was a bit of a pain to set up and take down multiple times during the day, but it was better than defacing my door.


 
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