Additional help with my shy girl Cupcake

Cupcake has come such a long way but I have to give her up. My guys still will not accept her no matter what I try and do. Whenever she is out of the bedroom they run after her. I do not think they are trying to attack her but still, it scares her and she will hide for the rest of the day

Does anyone have any suggestions?

Pattie

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


MOD NOTE: previous thread about this topic is here: http://www.thecatsite.com/t/296586/need-more-advice-on-cupcake#post_3737719

Have you tried the standard reintroduction measures such as scent swapping and feeding on opposite sides of a screen door? It should help teach the boys not to charge Cupcake, and her confidence with them should slowly increase.

Having a mega play session with the boys just before meetings might drain their energy enough to stop them chasing her too.

I was watching an old episode of My Cat From Hell today, and Jackson did something that might help. He was working with a very terratorially insecure cat, and suggested that they saturate fabric (blankets, cushions etc) with her scent and gradually place them strategically throughout the house - giving her safe areas to retreat to where she could observe and gain confidence. Might be worth a try.

It might also be worth rubbing the boys down with her scent too, and trying to encourage her to rub and play on a blanket saturated with their scent (I wouldn't rub her down with their scent at this stage though...it has to be her choice).

Site swapping should also help her learn that the house doesn't have to be scary. She may need time to get comfortable with an increased territory by herself before bringing the physical presence of the boys into the mix.

Asha was really helped by having a safe place from which to observe Shadow playing. She started off spooked by his play, but gradually gained in confidence...she'll now play with him occasionally - something I never dreamed would happen.

Hang in there. She's come so far already. You can get her through this. Keep the faith

How will you give Cupcake up? Have you found another home for her? If not, her life with you, though not ideal, is far better than her fate would be in a shelter or being put back outside. Shy, feral, and semi-feral cats are not considered adoptable, and are usually euthanized.

Two years ago I trapped and spayed a completely feral female cat who was 10 months old. My intention was to release her back outdoors and be her caregiver, along with another cat I care for who lives outdoors. She had a bad reaction to the anesthesia and surgery and became gravely ill, so I nursed her in a room by herself for a month, away from my other cats. Then during a vet check-up, it was discovered that someone had shot her with a gun when she was younger, and there is a bullet still lodged in her pelvis. Additionally, it had broken her leg, but her leg had healed, though somewhat crookedly, so she walks with a funny gait and can't jump very high. I decided to keep her. I have 4 other cats in my house, all male, and they still do not completely accept her. The younger ones don't allow her to come downstairs at all--they chase her back upstairs and at times bully her. She is quite content, however, to live upstairs, where she has run of the 3 rooms, food, litter box, cat tree, toys, etc. She has learned to co-exist with them according to the established pecking order. She is still semi-feral after all this time and only tolerates my petting her a bit. Her life isn't ideal in this situation, however, it's a LOT better than her being back outside. Whenever she looks down the stairs and sees my front door open, she runs and hides. She is very content to have food given to her, to play with her toys, and to have shelter from the weather. I love and accept her for who she is. 

Over time, Cupcake and the other cats will adjust to each other. It may be that she stays mostly in "her" room and that she never truly befriends the other cats. However, this is a much better life for her than if she was put out of your house or taken to a shelter. Also, if you adopt her out, be sure that whoever would take her has a lot of patience and experience with shy/semi-feral cats so they don't get frustrated and put her out. Caring for these special needs kinds of cats requires a lot of time and patience, but cats truly do learn to co-exist together inside over time, and it's rewarding knowing how much you've helped them.

How long have you had Cupcake?  It took my two boys 1 solid year to get used to each other.  I brought a feral male into my home with my resident male and large dog.  It was a process.  I rushed introductions and had to start from scratch many months later.  I took it slow and worked each and every day with them.  Gradually they learned to coexist and now they are best buddies.  It can work, but introductions need to be done correctly and slowly. 

Here is a great video from Jackson Galaxy on introducing cats.

I have had Cupcake for almost a year. She was doing fine with the guys last year u til I when on vacation and had a friend take care of them. When I got back, my 2 younger ones just would keep,charging her. She use to eat with them but now that won't happen.

She is out and about with them and has a safe place to go,to. But once she leaves that place, she is charged. I do t think,they are attacking her because there is limited hissing and growling.

She is going to a new foster. But that might not work either. The foster pet sat another cat and her cats did not get along with the new one, she will keep CC for 2 weeks. If it does not work out, CC comes back to me. I will try to get things to,work,out.

Pattie

So did you ever try reintroductions? It does work and it does help, but it takes time and patience. 

I hope that Cupcake is able to successfully integrate in her new home.

Cupcake (CC) went to stay with an "experienced" foster. 3 days later, the door was left open and CC was gone. Broke my heart. A cat trapper was brought in to try and trap her. I had the great joy of joining this lady one night as she set her traps and waited. No luck, no CC. So the next day, the trapper and I looked around the area and there is this abandoned farm. She set her traps there that night - and got CC.

CC is now back at the rescue being checked out, and will return to me. She will need to be in quarantine for 2.5 months until they can do the feline leukemia test.

Once that is over, and she is negative, I will start the introduction process with my guys. This time, I hope to get it right.

Pattie

Oh my goodness! Poor Cupcake.  It must have been such a relief to catch her and get her home safe and sound. Hopefully the time apart will allow them all to start with a clean slate. Just remember to take things slowly and let the cats dictate the pace. 

 that the FeLV test comes back negative