Dealing with the emotional heartbreak of saying goodbye to strays

I tried searching the forums, but didnt see anything like this topic, so my apologies if is is a repeat! I wanted to reach out for support and advice. There are two outdoor stray cats near my home who have become "regulars" to me. They've really taken a liking to me over the past two years since I moved into my apartment and I to them. They are older, perhaps 4-5 years old, both fixed males. I largely started caring for them once I found one of the boys with an awful open wound. Since then, we've become largely inseparable. They wait at my doorstep for me to come home from work, meow at the window to tell me when they need attention, etc, etc.

Anyway, now that I've finished school, I've got to move by the end of the summer. I'm positive the cats will be fine without me..this was their home before I came and will be their home after I leave. But I am truly afraid of missing them badly once I move and always wondering how they might be handling my change of presence. I know this sounds wildly narcissistic, but they really have become my pals, and saying goodbye to friends is never easy! So, does anybody have any advice on how to best transition?

(Forgot to mention: I do occasionally feed them. Once or twice a week I'll give them a cup of dry food, which they immediately a scarf down.)

It doesn't sound 'wildly narcissistic' in the least.. it sounds like someone with two close pussycat friends who is really going to miss her mates.

Are they definitely strays?  Do you think they're looked after by a few people around the place or do they have a home?

If taking them with you isn't an option, and it sounds like you feel they're happier where they are, then it's just one of those sad things we have to deal with when it comes to befriending cats.  Perhaps you could find someone in the area who could 'take over'?  Give them the attention at least something like you have done?

Since it doesn't seem like you can take them with you, if you are going somewhere where you'll be settled, perhaps you could adopt a needy cat.. Or you could do some fostering or volunteer at a local shelter.   I'm sure your two mates would approve.

I know just how you feel. I moved house nearly a year ago and still go back to the old place twice a week to see the cats I used to feed there. It's only a half hour drive, so I'm lucky.

If you only feed these cats occasionally there must be other people feeding them too? Is there somewhere for them to shelter? If they've been there for a while they must know how to take care of themselves.

Hopefully another cat lover will move in when you've gone and these boys will make some new friends.

Since you already have some outstanding advice regarding the cats, let's talk about you.

Having fostered (which is kind of what you're doing) dogs and cats, I really feel for loss and separation when you've invested time and heart into an animal that you truly care about. The goodbye is tough because you're feeling a little emptier and you know that they are too. Congratulations. Your tears make you a little better than a whole lot of people that measure their lives in other, less meaningful (to us) ways.

Since they'll ALWAYS be in your heart, take pictures so that some day, looking at them will bring a smile and not a tear. It'll happen. Memorialize their effect on you in a way that pays it forward. After you move, show up at a shelter with a donation of food or give some time. You've learned a LOT from them so put it to work and help others. Plus, you'll meet people who understand how you're feeling just by looking in your eyes. It's nice to be understood and not just be judged. I like to do that around the holidays because I find myself in a reflective and thankful mood so I easily forgive myself when I splurge.

Finally, really, really think of how lucky we are to have hearts that hold a limitless number of loved ones. No human or cat that I've ever known has a quota of loved ones, above which cannot be maintained. Your heart grows and grows and grows. Unlike everything else, this becomes what makes people like us so wonderful. Your newest friends will now be friends forever and will hold their own special place inside of you. If you know cats, you know that they understand that better than us.

Celebrate your feline friends even as you make them a part of your past. You've changed, permanently, because of them and due to you, they have as well.

Job well done and a life well lived is what I say!