Grieving cat and new household.

History on Crow:  We took Crow in as a feral over 11 years ago. She was a fierce girl who did not know how to love, socialize or be nice and did not get along with my geriatric boys. After several months it become a nightmare and she went to my mom's house for a respite. My mom and Crow bonded, fell in love and Crow had a new home.  Years pass...I needed to board Crow at the vets while my mom was in the hospital. After arriving at the vets office Crow bit me. I  rushed to the ER and was diagnosed with a Pasteurella infection.

Problem:  My mom passed away 2 weeks ago and I need to bring Crow to my home. I've been trying since April 20th to bring Crow to my house with no luck. I can see that Crow is hurting. She is pulling her fur out more than usual. She is being especially aggressive toward myself and my family.  Giving her away or putting her to sleep is  in no way a solution. Friends who have voiced their opinion have mentioned those options. The vet has not seen her in years and can not offer any advice to assist me besides bringing her in for a check up.  I have thought about using a have a heart trap, but I just do not know.  I do not want her to bite ANYONE because she is not vaccinated and what if the county forces us to put her down since she would be a repeat offender. The county was notified by the ER the last time she bit me.

HELP!  I am grieving myself and I want to do EVERYTHING I can to help Crow. I left a "dirty" shirt in the cat carrier so that Crow can smell my mom. HELP

I'm so sorry for your loss of your mom - it's commendable that you're trying so hard to do right for her cat.

If she's upset enough that she can't be handled, a trap might be a good idea. You can then take the trap straight to the vet and have her vaccinated right away, and get that over with. With her age, that also might be a good solution to have her checked out all in one go. At 11, she could have underlying health issues that are being exacerbated by her grief. I would make sure you let the vet know ahead of time that she's at least semi-feral, though, so they can make sure to wear protective gloves to handle her. 

She'll likely need a lot of time to adjust to your house. The shirt is a great idea. If you go the trap route, covering it in a blanket will likely also make it less frightening for her.

We have a number of members who have been in similar situations, and I'm sure they'll be along soon to offer ideas.

I agree with Ms. Freya. You will need to be there while the trap is set and waiting for her.You can try baiting it with tuna or sardines. I am also wondering about her being fed and cared for? I will be tagging @catwoman707  she might be able to help.

Bait a trap with tuna.

Then get out of sight, but nearby enough to hear when the trap gets set off, go and cover trap fully with a large towel, she will calm down.

Take the trap with her inside home, place on a peepee pad in a closed quiet room and uncover only the ends.

Leave her be for a day.

Meanwhile get an acepromazine pill from the vet.

The next morning you will unlock the flat end of the trap and slide canned pate food, 1/4 can with the pill in it, into the flat end door of the trap for her to eat.

After about 1 1/2 hours she can go to the vet safely. It doesn't knock her out but renders her pretty helpless and can be examined and vaccinated.

Once back home she will need to be acclimated well.

Do not expose her to others or pets for a while, you will close her in to her own room, with litter box, food, water, and a bed.

Visit her as often as possible. She will NOT attack, she is just very fearful and needs lots of time to adapt and get familiar with you.

Mom's clothing will be a comfort to her during this time as well. When you visit her, lay on the floor, time after time, eventually she will know you are not a threat to her, and come towards you.

Offer her really good treats from your hand, laying on the floor, talking in a sweet voice, treats in your hand and wait for her to come to you.

It will all take time but well worth it, as she may have many more years of life to live, and you will want her to be happy as well as you and your family and pets.

Thank you all so much!

It looks like the trapping her is the best solution. I have been going to my moms every other day to feed her, scoop the litter box and to talk to her. I am taking care of her as best as she will let me.  I can hear her say "It's not Okay!" when I tell her that I love her and that it will be Okay.

Crow will have 2 new brothers and I fully anticipate the acclimation period to be a long one. When they have met Crow in the past they all YELLED at each other.

I will put Crow in my bedroom closet (large walk in), so that she is away from the rest of the house, it's fairly quiet and she will have time to adjust to our schedule and we will have time to learn how to be her parents.

I will need to locate a vet willing to work with me. My current vet is great but does not feel comfortable doing any treatment unless Crow is seen.

Thanks all again! I will be trapping her next Monday, so that I will have the time to catch her and take care of her.

Okay, please let us know how it goes.