Is it okay to put a chronically ill cat to sleep because you are exhausted cannot care for it anymor

m0rdecai89

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My cat has chronic rhinitis and IBD for two years now and I am simply drained and can no longer take care of him, give him his meds, 4 meals a day, drops, and nebulization along with all the things I need to do such as work and my own health issues.

I have looked for a home for him but no one wants to take care of a sick cat and I know if I take him to a shelter or an adoption agency no one will want him and he will just sit in a cage until he is euthanized or succumbs to these illnesses.

His conditions are stable but it takes a lot of work on my part and living my life around him instead of having a life with a cat in it.

Is it ethical and fair to put him to sleep to avoid him suffering since I am physically and emotionally no longer able to take care of him?
 

2bcat

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This is a really tough situation, and I'm sorry to hear it weighs so heavily on you now.

I have to say that I don't think I could personally choose to end his life if he was otherwise comfortable and having a reasonable quality of life with the treatment. But, I say that having only spent about 4-5 months with a sick cat draining all my energy and time, and that was bad enough. 2 years is a much longer time.

How old is he? That might be another consideration.

Another thing I would bring up is if you are financially and medically able, try taking some time away from having to care for him. See if you can get a vet tech to cat sit. That might give you a renewed outlook after a break. It is possible to get a break if you want.

If you read much about taking care of anyone (pet or human) with a chronic condition you'll find info on the importance of taking care of yourself. I just like to think this needn't be so all or nothing, that there are ways you could maybe regain some sanity without having to completely give up.

I'm no ethicist, but I would find a decision to end his life based on what you've said so far to be on somewhat shaky ethical ground. I don't think you're tresting this lightly, as you have come here and asked the question rather than simply doing it. But I think you may realize that having to ask means that this is some really iffy territory for you. Others may have no trouble quickly choosing their own needs over some mere animal, but although you don't dicuss your bond with him I suspect there is something. Why else would you ask? I think you might find yourself regretting such a decision after you went through with it.

Just some thoughts. Clearly I am on the side of not doing it, but I hope I'm not coming across as judgmental. I can understand what might lead you to this point and I wish you well in sorting it out.
 

denice

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I admit I thought about doing this with Patches.  I spent six years vet hopping and I was financially drained as well as emotionally drained.  I would spend close to a thousand dollars on a hospitalization only to have him back in an e-vet clinic a few months later, it took six years to get a good diagnoses.  I decided to try one more vet and luckily that was the one who figured out what was going on with him and got things right with him.

The tough thing about your situation is that steroids are the easiest way to control IBD but they aren't good for his other condition.  This is a decision that only you can make but I can say that I understand you being at this point.  It's tough both financially and emotionally.
 

the3rdname

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Just MHO, I think there are a number of factors here that need to be taken into consideration including the cat's age and quality of life.  I do think it's unfair to cut an animal's life short if they aren't suffering or have such a poor quality of life that they aren't deriving pleasure from normal activities any longer.  And I do feel for you, I really and truly do, being a disabled person myself who has literally collapsed from exhaustion as a result of caring for sick cats.  I've gone through the whole crying because I'm too tired to move and yet can't sleep because the cats need this, that and the other thing.  It can be a living nightmare at times.  I get it.  

I guess my perspective is that taking responsibility for the welfare of another living creature sometimes means sacrificing until it hurts.  Love is pain, there's really no way around it.  Kids and animals are, at some point in time, going to suck the life out of you and challenge you to keep going when you're physically and emotionally depleted.  It's not an unanticipated part of pet ownership or parenthood.  It comes with the territory.  I do the best I can and remind myself, frequently, that it's Ok to be imperfect.  Sometimes meals are late (which is one reason I always keep dry available), sometimes meds aren't always given right on the dot.  I don't always have it in me to participate in structured playtime.  Caring for my cats comes first, so sometimes dishes sit in the sink, meals are throw-together affairs, I give myself permission to reach out to others for help when it's needed.  

Is there anyone you can ask for assistance, for any routine chores or errands that take time out of your day and sap that extra energy?  Family, friends...?  I don't know how I'd get by without a support system and every person struggling with health problems absolutely needs one.  If you have kids, don't be afraid to give them additional responsibilities. I know some parents feel guilty saddling their kids with extra chores, but kids are great about rising to the task when they know how important their contributions are to the well-being of the family.

If you simply cannot continue caring for your cat and have exhausted all other avenues, and I hope you'll let the members here try to help you figure out how to make things work more efficiently, I believe you owe it to your cat, if she isn't suffering or doesn't have poor quality of life, to rehome her.  Contact every rescue organization in the area and explain your situation- you'd be surprised at how many terminally ill cats are able to find loving forever homes- and expect that it will take a little time for someone to find a suitable pet parent.  

I always ask myself, What would I want my pet parent to do for *me* if the situation were reversed and I was the cat?  Imagine being in that position, where someone else literally has your life in their hands.  How would you want to be treated?  Of course longevity doesn't mean the same thing to our animals that it does to us, but there are ethical considerations when we're talking about an animal that is alert, active, not in pain, has a decent appetite and is still able to get around.  

I have a 15 year old IBD kitty who's mostly blind, has mobility issues, and every.  Single.  Day.  I have to evaluate her condition and how she's doing on the quality of life scale.  She's getting close to the end and I would be perfectly justified in expediting things, but then I ask myself, If I were this cat, would I want to live another day?  Would it be worth it to me?  

Also, consider that maybe there are other treatments for the rhinitis (what's causing it?) and IBD (have you considered a commercial raw diet?) that could improve her condition.  Never take the vet's word as the last word on anything.  They don't always know what treatments are available, they don't always keep up on the latest research.  Sometimes you have to seek out another opinion, see a specialist.  

I am very sorry that you're in this predicament and I hope to goodness things get better for both of you very soon.
 
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