Is my weird cat normal?

We got Marsha from our local pound in 2008, and she had been anything from normal since, I would venture to say she has been the most difficult cat I've ever owned. This was our first trip to this pound, and I was shocked at how they kept the cats and kittens, in wire frame cages suspended off the ground over a waste trowel with nothing in the cage but water.

This struck me as odd at the time, but I brushed it off. She was in the cage with her two siblings, and all looked very small and young, not sure how old and I did not ask (was too excited!). She was shy when we brought her home, but gave her time to adjust, and she did a little - but was never really a playful kitten, always very scared. Took her to the vet and got all her shots and vaccinations, and spayed when she was a little older.

Now the fun stuff, she never learned how to use a litter box. No matter the size, where I put it, where I put *her*, or the litter I used, she always peed on the side of the box and only occasionally pooped in it. This got frustrating very quickly and within a couple of months she became an outside cat.

We live in a small neighborhood, not very many cats, and Marsha never leaves the backyard. Within the last year or so she has chosen 2-3 spots in the yard and stays there, very sedentary, all day. This is what worries me the most. While she was never a very active kitten, this translated to adulthood and she doesn't chase, hunt, stalk or do anything you would except an outside cat to do. I tell my husband she is the least cat like cat I've ever had. She does not dig a hole to bury her poop outside, she does not clean herself - which leads to mats over the winter months no matter how much I get out there to brush her. And she still has kept her very small size, she is about 5 lbs and very scrawny.

Her eating habits also struck me as strange from the get go. She grabs food in her mouth and shakes her head - spreading food everywhere. When we switched her to hard food, I noticed she had a hard time eating it (still doing the head shaking) but that almost her jaw wasn't strong enough. I soaked her hard food, she doesn't eat it, and last year switched her fully to soft food. She picks around and eats at it, but rarely ever finishes all I give her. Which doesn't surprise me with how little activity she gets.

The only time I see her act like a cat is when I brush her, she enjoys that (for awhile) so she's getting a good brushing a few times a week.

So after hearing all this, what do you think? Her poop is all normal, pees regularly, but just acts.. Strange. We've theorized that maybe she was taken from hey mother too soon? And as our first cat together maybe we didn't give her the training she needed? I feel so guilty that she doesn't act like other cats, but in my eyes she has it nice, expensive food, brushings, and sleeping all day.

Poor little girl. She had quite an ordeal before you rescued her. Have you gad a vet check her over recently? The headshaking while eating suggests to me like she might well have a problem with her teeth/mouth. That could also explain the lack of grooming, but I'm not convinced that a sore mouth by itself is the whole problem.

Cats usually stop grooming through stress, illness or depression. That combined with her low weight and lethargy does make me think there may be something else going on with her. I wouldn't be at all surprised if she has some level of mental scarring from her bad start in life, but I would definitely get her checked over by a vet...ideally sooner rather than later.

Thank you for the reply. She has not been to the vet since she was spayed, and then once for a checkup after that. All things were good then. She's had the eating and non-grooming issues since we got her.

It was kind of interesting the other day, and actually what sparked this question in my head, I was at an acquaintance's house and noticed their cat well... Acting like a cat! Made me realize how different Marsha is.

Vet visit in the near future for sure, just saving the money in case something comes up bad. Also worried about getting tsk-tsked about neglect, but I promise when I say I try really hard to keep this cat happy and healthy.

It's obvious you care about her a lot. When you've only got one cat, and that cat acts abnormally from the day she cones home, it's surprisingly easy to lose touch with what's normal and what isn't. You've already done your girl a huge service by saving her from the horrendous conditions of that pound. We all make mistakes. What matters is that you're trying to fix them

Thank you for the vote of confidence, it helps alot.

We're here to offer help and advice, not to pass judgement on people who are only trying to do their best for their cats (imo anyway )