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not the best start to my day....

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 

This morning, I defosted the car and headed off to work. About a mile from my house is a newsagents and I thought to hell with it - would pick up a copy of the daily rag to have a look at in the office. It just so happens that this paper also has a page 3 stunna normally topless for us men to leer over. I buy it purely for the sport (yeh....).
I drive past the bust stop (sorry - bus stop)where I sometimes pick up a work mate and pull in next to the shop in the parking area. I get out into the car and lock the door and behind me pulls in a police car. Thinking nothing of it, I walk into the shop where an officer is buying something and was walking out. His mate was clearly picking him up.

I grabbed the paper and headed towards the man and paid him. The officer looked at the front of the paper where there just happens to be a photo of a couple of scantily clad females. He looked as I did and I made a comment like - "weather is looking up - by the look of them two there is definately a warm front on the way!". Both cops laughed, I laughed and we all walked out together. I started looking at the paper and my natural interest of page 3 got the better of me. She is a fit looking woman and as I am reading the text - I look right and up the street to look and see if my work mate is coming. Still looking sideways and not forward, I walked clean into a telephone box. The glass wobbled, my paper crunched and my nose went red and redder as it started to bleed.

The cops could only laugh as well as the shop keeper and the nose ran freely.

I picked up myself, dusted myself off and with a bright red face that you could spot faster than the color of rudolph, I skulked to the car. I prayed no one had seen me and drove off nursing a bloodied tissue.

I had a heck of a job explaining this at work this morning!

I really should come with a health warning - Danger - standing next to this man is not good for your health!

Its made me laugh - even if my nose still aches!

post #2 of 7

Sorry, I just had to laugh!
post #3 of 7

Kev, are you sure you're not my long-lost brother?
post #4 of 7
Thread Starter 
Originally posted by KittenKrazy

Kev, are you sure you're not my long-lost brother?
I figure I am not liked a lot - carol used to pack me up for lunch years ago - she used to use road maps so I did not find my way home .... I also knew when she hated me - she used alphabet soup that read "get lost".

If I was lost, I would lose ,myself looking for myself.

I will offer to be if it makes you feel any better - you would not want me though - aparently I am the miracle - its hard to believe I beat 1 million other little sperm to the egg or so Carol tells me.

Does the expression - "lights flashing, barriers down, no train coming " mean anything to you - if so - its me.
post #5 of 7
Well, I'm supposedly an only child ( I think for good reason, one of me is enough!) I've always been a little daft, but since I had surgery in March, the DH keeps telling me that" the lights are on, but nobodys home" sound familiar?
post #6 of 7
man, Kev, you crack me up!!!

how's the reindeer nose doing? better?
post #7 of 7
OMG how funny
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