I am so sorry to hear about your Grandfather. I know how you feel about the numbness, hang in there it does get a little better with time. I am saying a prayer for your Grandfather, you and your family.
I'm so sorry you've lost your Grandad. The numb thing is strange - I felt that when I lost my Dad, and although I was deeply sad inside because we were very close, I never howled and bawled my eyes out but had these waves of sadness and resignation come over me for a long time. Still get it sometimes, and it's coming up for 6 years since we lost him now.
Sending lots of love and healing wishes to you and your family.