two rescues coming home less than 48 hours apart

hello all, i am a newbie to the forum.  i've recently been bereft of the four-legged love of my life and decided to move on quickly by adopting two new friends from the animal care and control shelter.  friend #1 has been home for about 36 hours and is really starting to settle down and begin to settle in (he seems to realize that he has just won the kitty adoption jackpot!)

friend #2 comes home tonight after spay surgery.  so no one has had a chance to establish a dominant pattern or territory.  i want to integrate them into my apartment at a pace that makes sense - but how much should i really focus on proper introduction (i.e., a week of isolation with frequent territory swaps)?  is this just the best practice no matter what?

i actually think friend #1 will be thrilled when friend #2 comes home - according to his intake report, he used to live with another cat, and does seem to exhibit some separation anxiety and stress after coming home from the shelter.  i think some of his wandering around the bits of apartment i have exposed to him has been to look for another cat.

thoughts?  any ideas will be welcomed!

I really do think it's best to err on the side of caution and go with the long introduction approach.. it's easy enough to start that way and then notice if things seem to be going well and speed things up again.  It's much harder to backtrack.

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/introducing-cats-to-cats

Here are a few more articles and videos on cat to cat introductions.  The absolute key is to take things slowly.  Some cats will like each other right from the start, but others can take weeks, months and longer.  For the best possible outcome, follow the guidelines.  Keep the cats separated.  Cats are all about territory.

http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/a-simple-little-trick-to-use-during-new-cat-introductions/

http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/cat-behavior/introducing-your-cat-new-cat

http://jacksongalaxy.com/2010/10/01/cat-to-cat-introductions/

http://www.wvcats.com/integrating_cats.htm

yes, i did ultimately decide to begin the process the proper and slow way, especially since little girl was coming home from being spayed.  she's been great so far - eating, drinking, making urine - and totally unfazed by the scented (mine and his) socks and blanket i left in her basket to cuddle with.

he was a little more wary of the small piece of fabric i gave her to rub, but other than a little unhappy growl did not freak out.  it would be more accurate to say that he gave me a very knowing stink-eye and then set out to prove his independence for the next hour!  i'm going to keep them isolated and scent swapping for at least another day or two and then try to swap rooms.  

i've got feliway diffusers in each room and for him, at least, it calmed him down within about an hour of being plugged in.  almost immediately a lot of his anxiety vanished and he seemed much less inclined to roam and cry and more interested in initiating our first cuddle session.

Also the smell of the vets might make your other cat upset...

so, i do not know if anyone is checking in on me, but this is insane.  am i insane to read good omens in this?  

1 - original scent swap went...ok.  little boy took a sniff, scampered off, and turned his back on me.

2 - second scent swap was sort of the same except that he was willing to sit next to the "contaminated" blanket, as long as it didn't touch "his" blanket.

3 - swapped out "his" blanket for "contaminated" blanket this morning, giving little girl his blanket and vice versa.  no noticeable issue.  tonight at dinner cracked the door between them so they could see each other while eating.  little boy slightly startled but does eventually dig in.  little girl has no issues at all.

4 - crack the door again half an hour later and they make extended eye contact.  no hiss, no growl, no crouching of any kind.  little girl wants to come out and play!  before this can turn south on me (after about 90 seconds) i close the door, and give little boy insane affection for reward.

5 - move "contaminated" blanket to where i am sitting with little boy.  gives derisive sniff and scampers off.  then comes back and very gingerly sits on the blanket.  with much soothing and petting he settles into a compact ball.  then, after some gentle, extended petting, rolls over and curls up into a snuggly snooze on the "contaminated" blanket.

6 - will swap blankets again tonight to make sure everyone is thoroughly mixed up.  for reasons of dire necessity (multiple sorts of housework contractors) tomorrow i will attempt a room swap while i get some equipment out of little girl's "safe room."

does this sound like an ok progression?

This sounds like excellent progression.. and your description of it is a work of art..

LOTS going on here today - but room swap was a piece of cake.  little girl NOT happy about going in her carrier (she's still in the cone of shame and not super-into being picked up right now) but very excited to see a bigger piece of space than her "safe room."  little boy zoomed right into "her" room to begin exploring with nary a sniff nor growl nor moment of hesitation.  he even stepped in her little box with no concern whatever.

when i swapped them back, he did give me a small growl, but i think it was a combination of "someone's been sleeping in MY bed" and aggravation at all the things i am trying to get done today.  leaves less time for snuggles.  now that he and are i holed up in "his" room while some of the work gets done he's sprawled out like a champ."

p.s.  accidental extended eye contact at breakfast this morning, again with no outburst of anger.

we had a bit of a backslide yesterday afternoon.  during a peek-a-boo visit through the cracked door my little boy got a little crouchy and nervous, but did not hiss or growl and allowed me to pet him.  

then he proceeded to demonstrate his independence to me for the rest of the night.  obviously, of coruse, until it was time for me to go to bed, at which point it was cuddle time again.  but just prior to this little girl made an escape that completely did not faze my little boy.  by then i had him ensconced on a higher perch, and he kind of watched her run around, bemused.  made no move to attack or to crouch or get defensive, just looked at me, like, 'kids today, what are you gonna do?"

introductions temporarily on hold tonight as i assess little boy and his stuffy nose.  i spoke to my vet, who encouraged me to give him a little steam and keep an eye on him.  (no mucus, no discharge, just stuffy nose and some sneezing)  also tried heating up the food and he inhaled it.  i thik the dust from all of the activity in my home gave him some allergies.

had multiple periods of extended mingling over the weekend and even one night where everyone slept happily in my bed.  everyone was eating at the same time and in the same room and it felt like we were making respectable progress and now some definite backsliding.

strangely, it seems to be tied to the removal of little girl cat's e-collar after her spay surgery.  little boy cat has gotten skittish and nervous, and she mostly leaves him entirely alone.  i'm now separating them for most of the day again - if only for my own sanity - and am considering backtracking to extended room-swapping periods so they each have time to explore and to receive affection and attention.

right?  wrong?  the one time little girl took a swipe at him, i spoke to her in a stern tone and she went right into her little "safe room".  i left them separated for a while and took another go.  it's only been a week since they've both been home so it is early days yet and i want to be patient and also to not inadvertently reward bad behavior.

but i am concerned about the nervous temperament of little boy.  he seems anxious...a lot...and has done since i brought him home.  he was an "owner surrender" and i do feel like part of him understands that he used to have a house and then he didn't.  he is very vocal and likes affection but seems ambivalent about being held or cuddled.  mostly he likes to watch me at the computer and poke at my face experimentally - likes to know that i am close by, and cries when i am not.

feliway was working for several days but seems less effective and again, that is since little girl's e-collar came off.  little girl is a cuddle muffin and likes to sit as close to me as possible and is otherwise adjusting amazingly.  she was a stray but i am surprised at how easily she receives affection, and she is very responsive to my voice.

should i be reading to little boy so he can get more accustomed to me and the sound and tone of my voice?  would that possibly have any calming effect on him?  i've tried keeping the two at separate levels - little boy is much more confident when he can gaze down upon us, his loyal subjects...

Sitting with him and reading is a great idea, I reckon.  The sound of your voice should soothe him.