- Joined
- Jan 14, 2015
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On Mother's day of this year I made the most difficult decision I have ever made and put my son to sleep. He was only 10. My baby a month or so before had been diagnosed with carcinoma tumor on his left jab. I didn't even know this existed. He started drooling off his left jaw, got antibiotics and it didn't help. Then I took him 1 and a half weeks later to the same vet but got a different vet and he told me to get him tested for cancer.
Simba was with me from the 1st day he was born to his last day on earth. Our family had took in a stray and she surprised us by being pregnant. She had 4 wonderful kittens but I fell in love with Simba. He was my son from day 1. We ketp all of them. Brother took two. My parents and me kept the mom, Simba and her brother.
Simba trusted me so much that when i carried him he wouldn't hold on he would just let his paws go and knew I wouldn't drop him ever. As soon as I came home and sat down he would be on my lap.
What bothers me the most is that he was healthy otherwise. This stupid tumor took my baby from me so fast. I saw him deteriorate every day as the tumor got bigger. We just kept medicating him so he would suffer no pain. It got harder and harder for him to eat. We had to mush his food and feed it to him. I took him to every doctor I could. I even drove 2 hours + to a vet that was doing some experimental treatment but when he told me the side effects I declined. It would have made Simba live a life in pain and I was not going to do that for selfish reasons. The morning of Mother's day he tried to eat and the pain was so much he almost fell over. I knew it was time. The last I saw of my baby was him being carried away by a vet nurse through a door with a scared look in his face. I hope his last thoughts were not of him thinking I was abandoning him.
I still to this day feel regret. Regret I didn't send him to the vet sooner after I saw him drooling then again after the stupid antibiotics were not working. Regret that maybe when he use to lick my head something there might have given him the cancer. Regret I could not do more for him. Regret that he was taken away at such at young age still healthy.
I miss him so much. I was so miserable all this time. Depressed.
Recently for whatever reason about 3 weeks ago I looked online for cats named Simba who were fully orange like my Simba near me. In the whole United States and Canada I saw a 3 month old kitten that was about to be put up for adoption only 15 mins away from me! He had only 1 picture but looked just like my Simba.
That weekend I went to the shelter but he was not there. The lady who had found him didn't bring him in because she was away for the holidays. They told me he would be back next week at which time I can see if I can adopt him but no promises. I adopted Simba on December 21st without meeting him. Just out of blind faith.
I saw my new Simba for the first time on December 29th. And life has a funny way of going full circle. The last time I saw my Simba was being carried off by a vet technician into a door. The first time I saw my new Simba was being carried through a door by a tech. It was as if he was being brought back to me. He is an amazing kitten. Who loves to cuddle.
I still miss my baby. And I know this is not him . But somehow I feel like he knew I was so sad that he gave me someone else to take care of.
I miss you Simba, my son. Until we meet again.
Simba was with me from the 1st day he was born to his last day on earth. Our family had took in a stray and she surprised us by being pregnant. She had 4 wonderful kittens but I fell in love with Simba. He was my son from day 1. We ketp all of them. Brother took two. My parents and me kept the mom, Simba and her brother.
Simba trusted me so much that when i carried him he wouldn't hold on he would just let his paws go and knew I wouldn't drop him ever. As soon as I came home and sat down he would be on my lap.
What bothers me the most is that he was healthy otherwise. This stupid tumor took my baby from me so fast. I saw him deteriorate every day as the tumor got bigger. We just kept medicating him so he would suffer no pain. It got harder and harder for him to eat. We had to mush his food and feed it to him. I took him to every doctor I could. I even drove 2 hours + to a vet that was doing some experimental treatment but when he told me the side effects I declined. It would have made Simba live a life in pain and I was not going to do that for selfish reasons. The morning of Mother's day he tried to eat and the pain was so much he almost fell over. I knew it was time. The last I saw of my baby was him being carried away by a vet nurse through a door with a scared look in his face. I hope his last thoughts were not of him thinking I was abandoning him.
I still to this day feel regret. Regret I didn't send him to the vet sooner after I saw him drooling then again after the stupid antibiotics were not working. Regret that maybe when he use to lick my head something there might have given him the cancer. Regret I could not do more for him. Regret that he was taken away at such at young age still healthy.
I miss him so much. I was so miserable all this time. Depressed.
Recently for whatever reason about 3 weeks ago I looked online for cats named Simba who were fully orange like my Simba near me. In the whole United States and Canada I saw a 3 month old kitten that was about to be put up for adoption only 15 mins away from me! He had only 1 picture but looked just like my Simba.
That weekend I went to the shelter but he was not there. The lady who had found him didn't bring him in because she was away for the holidays. They told me he would be back next week at which time I can see if I can adopt him but no promises. I adopted Simba on December 21st without meeting him. Just out of blind faith.
I saw my new Simba for the first time on December 29th. And life has a funny way of going full circle. The last time I saw my Simba was being carried off by a vet technician into a door. The first time I saw my new Simba was being carried through a door by a tech. It was as if he was being brought back to me. He is an amazing kitten. Who loves to cuddle.
I still miss my baby. And I know this is not him . But somehow I feel like he knew I was so sad that he gave me someone else to take care of.
I miss you Simba, my son. Until we meet again.
