Afraid of giving stray abandonment issues!! Advice much needed asap

Hi Y'all, 

We've had this cat hanging around our house since we moved in a few months ago but haven't interacted with him much until recently.  I used to leave him a few pieces of turkey outside just when I had some spare so really not very often, maybe once every other week.  I thought he was probably someones cat in the neighborhood but we realized recently that he is actually living under our house.  

A few days ago I came home and while I was outside he approached me, and my roommate and I sat out there playing and hanging out with him for a few hours.  We got some food and have been leaving a little bit outside for him everyday and put down a box with a blanket for him to lay in.  He is truly the friendliest, sweetest cat I have ever interacted with and I would love to take him in.  The major problem is that we're about to leave town for almost a month and I don't want him to get too dependent on us right before we leave.  As soon as I am home I would LOVE to care for him as my own cat and will absolutely do so, but I am worried that he will feel abandoned if we continue to feed and play with him every day and then leave him for an extended period of time.  He has clearly grown really fond of us and is laying right outside our back door as we speak. He seems healthy and happy and I have a feeling the neighbors and the church next door are feeding him, but I'm honestly not totally sure.

My question to you is what is the best thing for us to do in this situation?  I really do want to keep him as my own outdoor cat once I am home and it seems like hes more than ready for us to do so, but I'm so worried that the poor thing is going to grow too dependent if we keep interacting like this and leaving him food all of the time and then leave him for over three weeks.  Should we be leaving food out this often?  And is it selfish of me to not call a humane shelter because I want him as my own?

Thanks for your help!

Can you buy enough food for the duration of your absence and ask church and/or neighbor if they would put it out for the kitty?

Karen

Unfortunately this is a college town and most if not all of my neighbors are students who will likely be gone as well (as we have a month long break for the holidays), but great point about the church- maybe I will ask them if they could do that if they haven't been already.  Thanks for your advice!!

Might you contact the local shelter/rescue and ask if they can help?  They might be better able to help you if you are able to adopt him yourself after you return.

Great suggestion Ondine-try various shelters/humane organizations, explaining the situation with a strong emphasis on the fact that you'll be bringing him indoors as a permanent cat as soon as you're home from break. The church also is very worth contacting - promise to provide the food ahead of time (making sure they don't forget he'll need water too - that - if you're in a cold climate isn't frozen). He definitely sounds like he's very attached to you already (& you to him! so sweet! ) and definitely was someone's cat at some point that's likely been abandoned.

My guess -if you're in a college town - it's very likely he was owned by another student and dumped when they went home for summer break. I've worked at a shelter in a college town and, sadly, it happened a lot. Every summer emaciated (bc as indoor kitties suddenly forced outside they have no idea how to fend for themselves) loving cats would pop up by the enormous numbers. Just please make sure you won't repeat the cycle when summer break comes up ---that you'll be able to take him with you when you go home (or wherever) at that point. You certainly don't sound like someone who'd do that, but for his sake, do think that part of your life right now through before bringing him in.

And if bringing him in ends up not making sense for you, please do still contact local shelters (no-kill if at all possible!) and get him somewhere where he can be taken care of until he finds a forever home.

Keep us posted! Hopefully this works for all of you and you've gained a very loving buddy!

Thanks for all the help!

And, kittychick, you're right about it likely being another student abandoning him which breaks my heart, I would never do such a thing.  I have my own kitty back home and can't even imagine how people are capable of it.  As for breaks and such- I'm graduating in the spring and will being remaining in town post-graduation, so I we've thought it over and feel equipped for taking him in.  

As for this break, it turns out a close friend will be remaining in town and said she will be more than happy to come by to feed and leave water out and give him some love and attention (she's got cats of her own as well) which is great news.  We live in SC so the temperature remains mild through this time of year so no worries about frozen water and/or kitties.  For now we've been leaving food and water and spending time with him outside, and will wait to begin the full adoption process and take him in until we get back in town.  We set up a box for him with some cozy blankets on our sheltered porch area, and he's in there now while it is raining and seems to be loving it.  Not to mention he's making it known how appreciative he is- seems like you're right about gaining a loving buddy, I'm in far too deep already!

Again, thanks for the advice- he's in good hands, I promise!

SOOOO glad to hear all of that! Please know I wasn't being accusatory (I know it's always so hard to tell tone in written communication). I just saw so much of that in the one town I worked in - -and I think a lot of students just don't think ahead. That's all I was say- that if you hadn't thought of it…but sounds like you absolutely have/did! 

That kitty is one lucky (at least now that he's found you!) kitty!!! Keep us posted on getting him into the vet for neutering, etc and how he does over Christmas break. I know it'll be easier to on it now that you know someone's watching him

*That was supposed to say "easier to DO it" not "ON it"

That's a thanks from both of us!!!

No miscommunication at all, you're right that many students don't acknowledge the responsibility of taking a pet of any sort in, and I'm glad you point that out cause I have seen far too many of my peers with pets they can't care for, and it can end up a sad situation for all- so better address it even if it comes off accusatory (which it didn't at all!!).