Signs that your cats are ready to get along?

After trying to integrate your new 2 year old female(spayed) stray ,with your other male cats, that you have had since they were kittens and are 5 yrs now,(both neutered) what would be some signs they are ready?

How will you know?

I keep the stray in her own personal room, pet gated but if you even leave the door ajar, she jumps it. If I then leave it open and she sees my other cats, she runs back in and close the gate.

If I or my husband hold her in other rooms in the house, she is fine til she sees either of my cats, then she hisses and when she jumps off either of us, we accidentally get clawed (scratched).

Not sure what is the right thing to do.

Hate to keep her in captivity and would like to slowly get her used to the other rooms.

I don't want her to think she is being punished when I return her to the room with the pet gate, I am looking out for her safety and theirs.

First off there are many internet resources on introducing a new cat to existing cats, a quick google search should suffice. I read a really good book though on cat behavior stuff and there was a really good section on introducing new cats.. if only I remembered what it was called..

Yes! Ok.........I was wanting an answer from a personal experience but I appreciate your answer, regardless.

Its a hard question to answer for anyone which is why I asked it.

catsmeow100 said:

 
After trying to integrate your new 2 year old female(spayed) stray ,with your other male cats, that you have had since they were kittens and are 5 yrs now,(both neutered) what would be some signs they are ready?

How will you know?

I keep the stray in her own personal room, pet gated but if you even leave the door ajar, she jumps it. If I then leave it open and she sees my other cats, she runs back in and close the gate.

If I or my husband hold her in other rooms in the house, she is fine til she sees either of my cats, then she hisses and when she jumps off either of us, we accidentally get clawed (scratched).

Not sure what is the right thing to do.

Hate to keep her in captivity and would like to slowly get her used to the other rooms.

I don't want her to think she is being punished when I return her to the room with the pet gate, I am looking out for her safety and theirs.

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i'm doing my first actual integration currently, between my snick and (at the moment) our foster jasper -- i won't be adopting jasper until after snick has crossed the rainbow bridge, as snick is a senior cat with medical issues.

may i ask -- how long has your female been with you? and, have you done any scent swapping?

it sounds as though your girl may be feeling ready to explore outside her safe room. i think it's important to room swap, so the new cat can become more comfortable with the rest of the home. that way, when she has a supervised visit with your boys she won't feel uncomfortable both with the unfamiliar area and your boys (who she doesn't know yet).

i'm happy to share my experiences with integrating my snick and our jasper so far. jasper came to us from a foster home where he had been attacked by an alpha male cat to the point where he needed to be kept in a separate room. of course, the fosters did spend time with him but jasper really loves being around people so he was unhappy. as a result of jasper being attacked by the other cat, he came to us very shy and scared of other cats. my snick is 14 years old, has medical issues, and is about as quiet and laid back as they come. snick and jasper saw each other, one in the upstairs hallway and the other at the bottom of the staircase, one night when jasper scooted out the door to his safe room. snick and jasper looked at each other, and the reactions were that jasper hissed/growled/ran back into his safe room and snick just sat looking. scent swapping went extremely well with both snick and jasper, no hissing or growling and snick curled up and laid on the blanket with jaspers scent on it. snick and jasper did "visit" each other with the safe room door between them 3 times. the first time jasper growled but i was there with him and talked to him which calmed him, the second time snick sat outside the safe room door and jasper peered under it at her with no hissing or growling, the third time they both peered at each other under the safe room door and no hissing or growling. i think that even if scent swapping goes very well, seeing each other is a whole new ball game. we did three room swappings over about two weeks time, but it seemed to upset snick that she was not in her preferred area (living room). so i decided to try a baby gate between the living room, and the kitchen and rest of the first floor of my house. snick was in the living room, and jasper in the kitchen and rest of the first floor. first time we tried that jasper jumped the baby gate in a split second -- he's 2 1/2 years old, so young and agile. i didn't want to rush in and possibly cause both cats stress or upset, so i watched and waited to see how it went. snick was asleep, napping up on a platform of one of her cat trees. after looking around the living room briefly, jasper jumped up on the cat tree and carefully got close to snick and smelled her. well that woke snick up, and she was startled to see jasper right there with her. snick hissed and growled and her ears flattened. jasper retreated immediately. we've had two more supervised visits so far, and they seem to be going well. snick still growls, but i've noticed it's a little less and no ear flattening. it's interesting to me that at first it was jasper who was hissing and growling, and now it has been snick and not jasper doing that. i'm thinking it has to do with their individual comfort levels at different points of their integration.

i've read that "as long as the fur isn't flying, they're not actually fighting, and neither is being hurt/injured" then they're okay. i think that's true, but i also think it's important to be able to "read" your cats so you'll know when they're past their comfort level or have just had enough for the moment. during snick and jaspers supervised visits, i keep the door to upstairs and door to jaspers safe room open for him, so he is able to retreat there is he chooses to. i've kept these first three supervised visits short, because i want them to be positive (or at least not negative) experiences for both cats. i've found that at different times during the integration, jasper has needed me to stay close to him or snick has needed me to stay close to her. it's just a gut feeling i get that one of them needs me to stay close to them for comfort, because i know them both well. i think it's normal for some hissing and growling to happen, but watch them to make sure it doesn't escalate.

what are your boys reactions to your new girl? any reactions when they see her? or smell her scent?

Thank you for the info!

Last night my husband brought the new 2 yr old female out and placed her on a parson chair in our living room and Hammer our 5 yr old was on top of the couch Prob 3 ft from each other. NO hiss! He stared at her but didn't move and she gave a small mew.

So neither budged. MC , my other one who is also 5 and brother to Hammer ran upstairs. Then Spirit jumped off chair and went straight to her safe house because I did remember to leave her pet gate open.

MC will go over to the petgate (SPIRITS safe house) and they will do the deer in the headlight stare but no noise.

So I don't know at this point how they feel about each other.

But as I said a week ago, she surface scratched me as I was carrying her back to her safe house when she saw MC laying in the path of her and I.

catsmeow100

catsmeow100 said:

 
Thank you for the info!

Last night my husband brought the new 2 yr old female out and placed her on a parson chair in our living room and Hammer our 5 yr old was on top of the couch Prob 3 ft from each other. NO hiss! He stared at her but didn't move and she gave a small mew.

So neither budged. MC , my other one who is also 5 and brother to Hammer ran upstairs. Then Spirit jumped off chair and went straight to her safe house because I did remember to leave her pet gate open.

MC will go over to the petgate (SPIRITS safe house) and they will do the deer in the headlight stare but no noise.

So I don't know at this point how they feel about each other.

But as I said a week ago, she surface scratched me as I was carrying her back to her safe house when she saw MC laying in the path of her and I.

catsmeow100

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that actually sounds good, like your new girl and hammer and mc are slowly and cautiously getting to know each other. i think it takes a while for them to build trust in each other.

as i mentioned, my snick and (our foster) jasper are just starting supervised visits -- we've done 4 so far. my two probably have that "deer in the headlight" stare going on too, when they're having a supervised visit. i think it's their way of feeling each other out, gauging what the others intentions are. snick and jasper's most recent supervised visit (the day before yesterday) went very well. jasper settled down on the other side of the living room from snick, and they just looked at each other for a good portion of the time. we did a good 20 minute visit, still keeping it short. jasper stayed right where he was, only rolling onto his side and back into sitting position a couple times. he seemed to know that the more he stayed quiet and didn't move around a lot, the more comfortable snick would be. and that was the first time that jasper has seemed to just want to be with snick and me relaxing together. this last visit, i pet snick and then let jasper smell my hand with snick's scent on it, then did the same with jasper's scent on my hand with snick. no hissing or growling with the scents from either cat, and also none when each saw me petting the other. i take it as forward progress that no negative reactions happened. my snick still does some hissing and growling, but i think it's more to let jasper know that she's still not comfortable with him getting too close to her and seems to mostly happen when they just start their visit. we're doing another supervised visit tomorrow.

In reply to integrating my cats, MC & Hammer of course are fine or were til this afternoon.

I still have the pet gate up for Spirit (the new girl cat) and I know she is a jumper so I put my husbands wide and high office chair in front of the gate.

I am trying throughout my day when I am here, to leave the bathroom door open and just have the pet gate so she can see and hear what goes on but I was with Hammer giving him his treats in my home office for the tricks he does and Spirit appears in the doorway. So I petted her at the same time as I did Hammer

She and he started moving a little closer ,then the growling and the hissing by both(which is a first for Hammer but Spirit is quite her usual at that!

I calmly said," okay that's enough and  held one of their beds between them (in case there were any thoughts of putting up the dukes).

She immediately turned away and went back in her safe house as I opened the pet gate. A little peavey, I might add..

But I went in with her and talked to her and she was just as friendly as any time with me.

She may have come from a family that had no other cats and of course my two have been strictly indoor with each other for over 5 yrs. So with a new kid on the block, I hope they will adjust. Though it is only 4 days past a week she has been behind the pet gate in our bathroom.

I played Da Bird with her earlier over the pet gate and then swung it out to MC so they were both playing at the same time but in separate if you know what I mean.

Well you do sound like you are in the same boat as I with your cats.

Hope all works out for all.

Keep in touch.

catsmeow100

catsmeow100 said:

 
In reply to integrating my cats, MC & Hammer of course are fine or were til this afternoon.

I still have the pet gate up for Spirit (the new girl cat) and I know she is a jumper so I put my husbands wide and high office chair in front of the gate.

I am trying throughout my day when I am here, to leave the bathroom door open and just have the pet gate so she can see and hear what goes on but I was with Hammer giving him his treats in my home office for the tricks he does and Spirit appears in the doorway. So I petted her at the same time as I did Hammer

She and he started moving a little closer ,then the growling and the hissing by both(which is a first for Hammer but Spirit is quite her usual at that!

I calmly said," okay that's enough and  held one of their beds between them (in case there were any thoughts of putting up the dukes).

She immediately turned away and went back in her safe house as I opened the pet gate. A little peavey, I might add..

But I went in with her and talked to her and she was just as friendly as any time with me.

She may have come from a family that had no other cats and of course my two have been strictly indoor with each other for over 5 yrs. So with a new kid on the block, I hope they will adjust. Though it is only 4 days past a week she has been behind the pet gate in our bathroom.

I played Da Bird with her earlier over the pet gate and then swung it out to MC so they were both playing at the same time but in separate if you know what I mean.

Well you do sound like you are in the same boat as I with your cats.

Hope all works out for all.

Keep in touch.

catsmeow100

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yes, it does sound like we're just about at the same point with our integrations. they're getting to know each other/become comfortable around each other, and setting boundaries with each other.

today we have been doing something a little different. i got my usual morning cleaning/tidying done, then simply opened jasper's safe room door and talked to him, encouraging him to come downstairs with me for a while. i had made sure that snick was awake on her cat tree downstairs, so no sudden or unexpected visit on snick's end. things went very well, some more mild growling and only one hiss (when snick was shifting positions on her cat tree). i've left jasper's safe room door open the rest of the day and he's come back downstairs a couple times, settling in and relaxing and doing a bit of exploring. i won't leave the door to jasper's safe room open overnight, while i'm asleep.

with my snick and jasper, they just need time to see and learn that they both just want to enjoy the quiet and don't want to mess with each other or be messed with. snick and jasper are very well matched, very compatible, they just don't know it yet.

Today Spirit stayed by my husbands side, on his living room chair, while house cleaning was done

However, Ham and MC split because they hate when I run the sweeper.

After cleaning done, Spirit jumped down from chair and ran straight to her safe house.

Tonight, I took a bit of a risk because I wanted to watch X Factor which I love so I brought Spirit out to lay beside me and said to her,"Let's watch X Factor together, so I placed her beside me and she went into lay position and this was while I sat on my love seat with Ham on the top of love seat (not the side we were but none the less very close and MC was on one of the parsons chairs only a few feet away.

They looked but resumed lounging.

She was nervous I could tell by the way her ears were pointed but she stayed about 5 minutes and ran out to their room and was trying to eat their food.

This girl can really put it away but she already had polished off the amount that is daily recommended so I removed their dish so it was out of the way.

She stayed awhile and neither of the boys came out.

Pretty quiet but I still am not sure so the visits out of the safe house will always be supervised til I see what they do when she is checking things out.

Today Spirit stayed by my husbands side, on his living room chair, while house cleaning was done

However, Ham and MC split because they hate when I run the sweeper.

After cleaning done, Spirit jumped down from chair and ran straight to her safe house.

Tonight, I took a bit of a risk because I wanted to watch X Factor which I love so I brought Spirit out to lay beside me and said to her,"Let's watch X Factor together, so I placed her beside me and she went into lay position and this was while I sat on my love seat with Ham on the top of love seat (not the side we were but none the less very close and MC was on one of the parsons chairs only a few feet away.

They looked but resumed lounging.

She was nervous I could tell by the way her ears were pointed but she stayed about 5 minutes and ran out to their room and was trying to eat their food.

This girl can really put it away but she already had polished off the amount that is daily recommended so I removed their dish so it was out of the way.

She stayed awhile and neither of the boys came out.

Pretty quiet but I still am not sure so the visits out of the safe house will always be supervised til I see what they do when she is checking things out.

I'm so jealous of you guys! 

Tempest and Sinbad are still unable to visit each other without the gate between them. I'm confidant that they will eventually be able to meet though, as they are continuing to slowly improve their relations. Tempest comes out of her room more often now, although she flees at the slightest hint of his approach. But her "recovery" periods from accidental meetings are shrinking, and she doesn't hiss at him much any more. She mostly just bats at him through the gate now when he's getting too rambunctious. 

I recommend treat bribery. That's how we're doing it now. I can see they are building a relationship via manipulating mommy into giving out treats. When they see me watching them, they'll look at each other clearly considering working together to be cute enough that I'll give out extra treats. Sometimes they actually do! They're also now used to being within a few inches of each other's noses because I've slowly moved treat placement closer and closer, and now they're nearly nose to nose up against the gate while eating.

I've been pondering what signs to look for to gauge readiness for another attempt at supervised play, but at this point I think we have to get to the point where Tempest doesn't immediately flee before anything else.