Adoption quandary

I've been fostering two adults cats at my house for a while, and I really, really need to get them adopted.

One is a very friendly gray male, Russian-blue looking. The other is a dilute tortie I've worked with to try to socialize, but I haven't been able to make that much progress with her. She doesn't like to be petted or handled, which is a problem. She likes to play with people and likes being around them, but I just haven't been able to break through the no-touch thing. I've been thinking that I might have to return her to the TNR colony she came from, but I would only have done that before the weather turned cold so she could acclimate.

A woman answered an ad of mine in September and came to visit them. She actually hit it off with the semi-socialized female better than I ever have, so she told me she'd like to adopt them both. Then the delays began. She was getting married and moving in with her new husband, so it was, "I'll pick them up next week." On and on. She kept assuring me that she was going to follow through. Then her husband only wanted her to take one cat, so she was just going to take the female. She just called tonight, and she seems to have changed her mind again. Now she's thinking about the male, which would leave me with one cat that will be very hard to adopt out.

I told her way back in this saga that if she said she was going to take them and didn't, she would put me in a very difficult situation, and that's exactly what she's done even though I held them for her and stopped advertising. I may be moving in the next few months, and I need to get this settled before then. I also need the space for my business, and I'm losing money every month I have to keep them here.

She talked to me tonight about it, and I told her I'd tell her tomorrow what I would be willing to do. My gut feeling is that she's trying to juggle way too many things and that I'm going to end up in a "boomerang" situation. She wants a "buddy" for her cat, but I can't assure her that two cats that have never met each other will get along. She knows she needs to keep a new cat indoors to imprint on its new location, but she doesn't want to have to make it so her cat can't use the cat door--now that it's cold outside.

I feel like I just need to tell her the deal's off and start advertising again. Any thoughts?

I think you should go with your gut, which is telling you that this lady has too many things going on in her life and she is not a suitable suit for this/these cats. Or she is just full of excuses and taking the passive aggressive way of changing her mind. The last thing a cat needs, especially a semi-feral/socialized cat, is to go into a somewhat chaotic house.
Good luck in finding a home, been there.

I know what you're dealing with. I'm stuck with three cats that I will never be able to place. Two of them because I was not able to socialize them enough to be adoptable, like your female. Placing cats is hard, even if they are perfectly sweet wonderful cats. Unfortunately I think you need to prepare for the possibility that these kitties will be with you for a while longer.

I would not give them to this woman for several reasons but the number one is that they would have access to the outside and the risk that they will take off and never be seen again is big, especially with the female but with the male one too. She also doesn't sound committed and an adopter needs to be committed or the cats will need rescue again the future when something else in her life changes and she doesn't think the cats fit into her life anymore. You need to start advertising these kitties again and be very proactive about it.

Are you working with any kind of rescue or shelter? If not you may want to contact a few that does adoption shows and ask if you could bring your cats to the show so that people can see them. Put bandanas or bows on them or something to make them stand out.

When placing adult cats for adoption you have to approach it like you are selling something that is hard to sell. The advertising has to be good. You have a lot of competition and finding a home for a cat who you can't pet is very, very hard. Good pics are everything. I had a black cat that I had for two years and no interest. I eventually put a little purple sweater on her and took some pics. Her Petfinder listing went from having no views to several a week. Tricks like that are very useful to make sure that the cats are seen and someone even bothers to read their ad, which has to be detailed and good too.

Good luck!