Need Advice on Feral Father and Two Adolescent Kittens

I just discovered this site and have been impressed with the insight and help provided on caring for feral kittens.  I would greatly appreciate your insight on what is happening in my city backyard.   Around March 2014 three kittens were born in the empty house behind me.   They would sit on the ledge of that house and watch me in my own walled-in garden below, and I literally watched them grow up.  Only two kittens made it to adolescence, and are now about 8 months old.   They have taken up residence in my garden and I have been feeding and interacting with them for months now.   The mother and father (a huge, unneutered tomcat) would often visit my garden too, and the whole little family was very affectionate with each other.   However, the mother disappeared months ago for some reason and I haven't seen her since.  I had the two (male) kittens trapped and neutered but was unable to catch the father.  Over the past months I became very attached to the two young cats, especially the very fuzzy blonde one who was shyer and more timid than his tiger-striped brother.   Both would run to me for feeding, let me pet them, take treats from my hand, play with balls I put out for them, etc.   The unneutered tomcat dad still came around and all three seemed to get along very well, always happy to see each other.  

When the weather started getting cold, I purchased a heated cat shelter, which the tomcat quickly took over and would not let the kittens in.   So I purchased a second one and all seemed well:   the kittens curled up in one and the unneutered tomcat dad used the other.  All seemed fine.  (Gosh, I'm sorry this is so long, but I want to make sure you understand.)   This past Saturday morning the fuzzy, shy blonde adolescent kitten was completely gone.   And the father tomcat appeared to have (new) wounds under his neck.   It is now Monday and still no blonde kitten.  That shy kitten never went anywhere without his brother and I have to admit that I think the father might have killed him.  Why would he do that?  There was food enough for everyone, shelter for all, and both kittens were neutered!   I had been told that tomcats won't bother neutered males.  Moreover, there are no females around at all.  I am completely devastated and can't stop blaming myself for not adequately protecting them, but they all seemed to get along so well!   There is no sign of the kitten (no body, blood, etc.) in my walled garden, and I cannot bring myself to put up a ladder to look into the backyard of that empty house behind me.   Then today when I peeked inside one of the shelters, the black tomcat and the remaining tiger-striped kitten were cuddled up together!    Usually only the kittens slept with each other like that.   Is it possible that the tomcat simply ran the other kitten off for a reason, or do you think he actually killed him?   Again, these kittens are 8 months old and neutered.    I have my own 14-year old cat who never goes outside, and the guilt and pain I feel about this is close to how I would feel if something happened to her.  The idea of the tomcat hurting that sweet, shy, beautiful, 8-month old kitten just breaks my heart, and I am inconsolable right now.  Could it have been a possum which (apparently) have been spotted in my downtown neighborhood?   If the tomcat ran the kitten off, is there any chance he will return?  Any insight you can provide would be greatly appreciated.   Thank you so much.

Thank you so much for helping these kitties.  It really makes a difference in their lives.

Two things come to mind.  First, if the kitten had wandered the neighborhood at all, some kind soul may have taken him in.  I would post flyers and just double check.

Second, it is possible the father was involved in a fight with another intact male, though and that cat may have attacked the kitten.  I do not think dad would have run just one kitten off, especially as he was neutered and dad is now buddies with the other kitten.

I would make every effort to trap dad and neuter him, as it will certainly cut down on neighborhood fights.  It once took me a year to trap a neighborhood bully cat, so persistence is important.  After he was released, he adopted my neighbor and now lives on her sun porch.

Thank you so much for your response!   The idea that someone down the block might be helping the other kitten occurred to me (and made me feel better), and I certainly hope that's true.   I will do the posting that you suggest (which is a great idea since, given that this is Center City Philadelphia, I don't even know all the people down the block).    There are several other walled backyards like mine, so hopefully he is there and being cared for.   (He is beautiful; he looks like a blonde Persian, with a huge, fluffy tail and green eyes, so hopefully he charmed someone else.)

Yes, I agree about TNRing dad.  I did try but he is a wily old thing -- he just sniffed at the food in the trap (from outside of course) and walked away.   I'm sure it was not the first time he had seen a trap.   And he is huge and strong -- he literally looks like a panther.   It may come down to sedating him via food (Xanax anyone?) for me to ultimately capture him.

Thanks again.  

I have observed possum to actually be quite gentle and shy. They don't bully cats like some raccoons do. Please don't be too hard on yourself and please don't imagine the worse. There are a million possibilities including sometimes cats just leave on their own accord for reasons we will never know. Some even return magically months later. And although it is hard to do I believe ferals demand we love them with an open palm. They are free spirits.

Ah yes, I sure wish there was something we could use to make them sleepy.  But it would only make them hide before they went to sleep, which would still make it impossible to trap them!  I once gave thought to investing in a dart gun until I realized the darts would have had to have rope attached, so I could track where the cat ran after being darted!

You may be able to connect with the people here:

http://www.spayneuterphilly.com/feral-cat.php

They may have drop-traps, which work well with trap savvy cats.  They may also have people who can help you trap or otherwise support your efforts.

Fingers crossed the kitten is safe.

Thank you for those kind words!   And I didn't know that about possum.   I will try hard not to imagine the worse, which is why I'm not going to look in that other backyard right now.

Sorry, I'm still getting the hang of this site.   My reply to your kind words actually went to the post below yours.  Thanks again!

With regard to the sedation issue prior to trapping, I was thinking of giving him the drugged food while he is in the cat shelter, letting him get busy eating it, then quickly turning the (round) shelter so that the door opening is against the wall (then putting an iron garden chair against it),  thus trapping him until he falls asleep.   He's a very lazy cat -- he would stay in there all day if people didn't bother him with gardening, etc.    A drop-trap or net of some kind is a good idea too, but I would need a few very strong people to help me.   He's scary.   Thanks!

I understand how hard it is when our feral little friends disappear. I have a small colony of cats I feed and when one doesn't show up to eat I worry so much I make myself sick. I started feeding a little family that was Mama cat and her 5 daughters. One got sick at 8 months and I did have to put her to sleep. Tess was another daughter and she stuck around for 3 years. A couple of times she was gone for 12 or more days at a time and then one day in July 2012 she never came back to eat again. I know she was eating somewhere else because she never lost any weight while she was gone.

I got in touch with an animal communicator because I couldn't stop worrying if something bad had happened to her. I want to believe what the animal communicator said........she said Tess was being fed by a man and he feeds a bunch of other cats too. Tess said it was to intense at my house. I miss her so much, she was one that I could pet and she talked to me all the time. A friend who lives down the road had feral cats that took off on a little adventure but would return a few weeks later. I also had a male feral cat go missing for almost a year and then I spotted him in the neighborhood one day.

I hope your little one has found someone who is taking care of him and he returns soon.

Thank you so much for those encouraging words.   Signing up for this site was the best thing I could do today!      Not all of my friends understand my attachment to these two little guys, so I don't feel that I can talk with them about it.   It's so wonderful to find a whole community of people who don't think I'm crazy for getting so upset about this.   Thank you all!   

Cate S said:

 
With regard to the sedation issue prior to trapping, I was thinking of giving him the drugged food while he is in the cat shelter, letting him get busy eating it, then quickly turning the (round) shelter so that the door opening is against the wall (then putting an iron garden chair against it),  thus trapping him until he falls asleep.   He's a very lazy cat -- he would stay in there all day if people didn't bother him with gardening, etc.    A drop-trap or net of some kind is a good idea too, but I would need a few very strong people to help me.   He's scary.   Thanks!

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That might work but you'd have to be very careful about what you gave him.  Unless I talked to a vet (and got his or her permission), I would avoid giving him any medications.

You could also start feeding him in a dog crate (on your deck maybe?).  Once he gets used to eating in there, you can close the door on him.  I used that method to trap two six-month-old ferals.  They made like popcorn inside that crate but I covered it and they calmed down while I got them to the vets.

The spay/neuter group can hook you up with a low-cost, bring them when you trap them program, too.  Otherwise, you'll be paying top dollar at the vet.

Thanks, yes, my vet has been involved with sedation of my indoor cat when traveling, and that medication would not harm the feral.   I know how to dose it.   And I have already trapped and had neutered two feral kittens (described in an earlier post) with the help of a local agency, so I'm all set with that support as well.     Thanks for your feedback!

Oh, good.  Sounds like you have a plan.  Vibes it works quickly and mom is safe and sound.

I considered trying to use a sedation medication to trap the feral tomcat I've been caring for during the past 3 years (he, too is trap savvy) but decided against it for several reasons. First, a cat can have a bad reaction to such medications--ranging from the medicine having the opposite desired effect (making them hyper and wired), to causing seizures or respiratory failure. Just because your other cats handled the medication okay doesn't mean this one will.  If your tomcat had a bad reaction, what could you do? He's not tame, so you couldn't just scoop him up and take him to the vet. That has been my dilemma whenever I've had to give my tomcat feral any kind of flea medication or antibiotic when he's been ill--all medications have the potential to have side effects.  With socialized cats, you can just pick them up and take them to the vet if they have a bad reaction, but you can't do this with ferals.  Second, if you sedate him, you still may not be able to trap or catch him. Feral cats have amazing reflexes and instincts. If he eludes your grasp after you've sedated him, then he will be sedated, afraid of you, and vulnerable to attack by other wildlife (including other feral cats and raccoons). Third, I doubt any vet will prescribe a sedative for a feral cat, especially one they have never seen nor examined. I hope you re-think this strategy and consider other options.

I don't believe your tomcat hurt his offspring. Tomcats fight in order to mate with females in heat, or for territory when intruders try to move in and there are limited food resources. Tomcats tend to get a bad rap and are blamed for many things they aren't guilty of. Maybe I'm biased because my own tom was a very loving, caring papa cat to his offspring that he brought to me a few summers ago, and took care of them when mama cat left until my neighbor and I adopted and socialized them. Tomcats are capable of forming loving bonds with their offspring. I am thinking that your tomcat was most likely wounded in a fight with another tomcat, over territory or mating issues.  

I think it's very likely that someone took in the kitten, especially if he's as pretty and friendly as you have described. This sort of thing happens all the time--people (like myself) are suckers for strays!       

MsAimee, thank you for your advice regarding the medication.   All the points you raise are good ones and rest assured that  I haven't committed to this plan.   But, frankly, right now the tomcat's welfare is less a concern to me than that of the remaining kitten.   (The tomcat is still being fed, watered, and provided a cushy heated shelter in my garden.)  To reiterate, I am in a densely populated urban neighborhood and for the past year only these cats -- the unneutered tomcat, the mother cat (who has been missing now for at least 7 months), and the two male kittens about 8-9 months old (which I trapped and had neutered) have been spotted on my block.   No other cats have been seen in my yard or my neighbors' yards this past year or even a few years back.  

I feel sorry for the tomcat and don't wish him harm, but it seems  too big  a coincidence that the same morning he shows up with awful wounds under his neck, that one kitten is simply gone.  I SO want to believe he didn't kill the kitten for some reason but I have serious doubts.   That shy kitten would not go anywhere without his brother so I doubt he simply bolted.  They were always together.  And since that kitten cruised the wall between all of our adjacent gardens almost daily, it seems a real stretch to assume that on the same morning that the tomcat shows up wounded,  someone decided to try and bring the kitten inside (a challenge in itself).   (Gosh, how I would love to believe that!!   But it's pretty impossible:   I saw the kitten in my garden around 7:00 p.m. Friday night;  he was gone when I checked at 6:30 a.m. on Saturday.)   The only thread of hope I do have is that perhaps the wounded kitten presented himself at someone's back door, and that prompted them to render help.   Sorry to go on and on, but I am just heartsick about this and wish I could shake the guilt I feel about it.   Bottom line:  I will definitely consider all suggestions and possibilities before I try to trap the tomcat again.  And I greatly appreciate your and everyone else's advice and help! 

I agree that your focus should be on finding the missing kitten. Have you asked around the neighborhood? Do you have pictures of him you could print out and show around and post on your local pet lost and found eebsite? It would be very unusual for the tom to suddenly turn on his neutered offspring. Cats fight over territory and mates. It's more likely that another cat fought with the both of them, or that they both encountered some other wildlife like a rat or raccoon. You have no reason to feel guilty. When we care for ferals, there is a lot beyond our control. They are vulnerable to illness, injury, getting hit by cars, or getting attacked by dogs or wildlife. You are doing such a great job caring for these cats. I hope you get some answers and resolutions to this situation soon.

Thanks for the encouragement.  I do have a photo I can post, and I can ask neighbors too, although I have to be a little careful about that.   Long story -- not everyone likes having ferals around.   Tomorrow I want to walk down the little street behind me (the gardens of those houses back up against my garden) and see who's around who might have seen him in their yards.   I'll also check my adjacent neighbors, at least the ones I know (new houses were built on one side of my house, so there are new neighbors, some of whom I haven't met.)   I guess I'm not hopeful because I can't imagine he wouldn't come back to be with his brother if he could. And they just love my yard.  My fantasy is that someone kind picked him up or at least  gave him shelter or, if injured, took him to get care.    Thanks again for the encouragement.

The missing blonde kitten returned to my garden on Thanksgiving Day, after 2 weeks missing!    He was dirty, disheveled, and a little spooked, but otherwise unharmed.     I can't imagine where he was, but I am SO relieved.   And this does vindicate his dad, the black, unneutered tomcat, who I thought had harmed him.  You all were correct -- he did not harm the kitten.   I saw them greeting each other in a very friendly manner.   (When I spotted him in my garden mid-day on Thanksgiving, I actually shrieked, which my visiting sister thought was a result of too many Bloody Mary's.   Typical little sister behavior, right?)

Thanks everyone for your kind words and encouragement!   I really never believed he would return.   Now I want to get busy keeping them warm for the winter, and taming them further for adoption.

Oh good news! The faster you get Pop neutered, the better. Will you be able to get the kitten to a vet for check-up. If he's beat-up looking, he may have gotten into a fight (and possibly caught something). Please try if you can.

Yes, I'll try my best to capture and neuter dad.   The kitten is not really beat up; his fluffy hair was just a little dirty and he was a bit thin.   And this morning he looks just fine -- all cleaned up, well-fed and happy.   But I'll try to inspect him again for any wounds that might need a vet's attention.   Here he is!