I recently adopted an extremely shy cat and she is not making much progress - am I doing this right?

6hnf7hlyv

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I have had Olive (adult, female British shorthair mix) for about 2 months. I had to move apartments about two weeks ago, and that was scary for her. I adopted Olive from a local shelter - she had been picked up wandering along the side of a highway. She is EXTREMELY shy and skittish and spends much of her time hiding. I have been petting her as often as she wants to be petted (although I am still learning to read her body language and she does not set very strong boundaries so sometimes I unwittingly pet her for too long), and over the past week I have gotten her to play a bit (only for ~5 min. at a time, and halfheartedly at that). She is eating and eliminating regularly, has seen a vet and is more or less medically healthy. She is definitely more comfortable than when I first brought her home, but not by much. She only lets me pet her when she is in her "safe zones," she has NEVER approached me to seek affection (or anything else, for that matter), she is scared to be out in the open (she needs to have her back to a wall and if I walk into a room where she is out in the open, she gets terrified and bolts off to a hiding place) and is still reticent to play (and the little bit of play that does happen only happens in her "safe zones"). I have given her plenty of cozy hiding spaces in every room of the apartment, a scratching post in every room (which she uses) and a cat tree (which she does not use). Should I be doing something differently? Should I stop approaching her and ignore her until she comes to me? I love her immensely and I just want her to feel happy and safe, but this is my first cat and I am not sure what to do. Please help.
 

hexiesfriend

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I had a very very skiddish cat as well. I found getting down on the floor where she is and asking her to come to me helped. My cat girly hid under the bed for 3 months one day I just laid down on my back on the floor to peek under the bed to ask her to come out. I reached out my hand and she came. I realized I was too big for her to be comfortable and needed to become her size, a few weeks of this and she gradually came out. I was still aware of her fear and tried to stay sitting on the carpet when I called her. After maybe 6 or 7 months she would jump on the sofa and sit in my lap. She was still a skiddish cat and ran when scared but she wasn't scared of me anymore.
 

Ms. Freya

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Shy csts can sometimes make very slow progress (my Random lived out of sight for the first month) but it does sound like she's doing better. When you're in a space with her, try tslking to her without approaching her - it helps her get used to the idea that you're living in the same space. Honedtly, though, it sounds like you're on the right track and she'll come around in her own time.
 

vbcatparent

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I went through a lot of the same stuff with my rescue Regent. You have to keep in mind that Olive's past is unknown -- it's possible that she had a rough time before being picked up. She may be dealing with anxiety or paranoia. My poor Regent was abused in his old life, and he still flinches when we move our hands abruptly.

You have somewhat of a dance to do. Let her poke around the house in peace a little; don't gush over her and make her nervous every time she appears. Visit her in her safe zones. Sit or lay on the floor so you don't look so big. Talk in a sweet voice, from about arm's length away, and just visit like that for a while. Then pet or play with her a little before you leave. Always make yourself cut the visit short and leave before she gets tired. Don't take cues from her on that, at least for now. Visit for 5 or 10 minutes, spending maybe 2 minutes touching her. Then leave. Eventually, she will meow or try to follow you.

See if you can find a treat she likes. Put them on the floor when you visit. Don't try to get her to eat from your hand; right now, you just want her to see a connection that you come bearing goodies. That will help her look forward to your visits.

Above all, don't try to rush her, and don't keep prodding her to make progress. Just love her like she is and visit with her often. Eventually, she will trust you.
 
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6hnf7hlyv

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Thank you! Quite helpful.
 
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