The cat I did not save - did I do wrong?

So here I am again, trying to make up for all of the postings I should have done, and I think I have a pretty good topic here.

About two years ago, I went into an apartment complex and found there was a kitty who was living off the scraps that people threw out and had no real shelter.    She didn't look good.  Her fur was all dirty and matted and her eyes looked redder than I thought they should look. 

Not knowing what else to do, I started going to see her every other day, and brought her high quality cat food and tuna to eat. 

Eventually I got around to talking to some of the tenants and I told them I would be willing to take kitty to the vet to determine her state of health.    Naturally, to me, that meant that I would have her put down if she was sick and

suffering, but I didn't tell anyone that.     Most of the tenants felt I should leave the kitty there, because after all

(I say with much sarcasm)" she had the run of the whole apartment complex, how happy would she be if I had her sent to a shelter?"    Even if I took her to a place that did not put cats down.

By then, I got to be known by the tenants and I was scared to do anything.     I also was told that for warmth, she slept inside the engines of cars at night.    What a life!!!     I was so frustrated.

So, I kept checking on her, then I gave up and this last summer, I never saw her once.    I am sure she died and I don't know how.    I shudder to think of how!    She might have easily had feline leukemia.

I feel guilty that I let a bunch of non-caring, misinformed apartment dwellers who did not give her a home, but wouldn't allow me to take the matter into my own hand's - and my vet's.

G*D do I feel bad!

I do not call them misinformed apartment dwellers out of prejudice for such people.   I used to live there, and I helped tons of cats while I was there.    But I felt I had more rights then because I did live there.

But, in this situation, what would you have done?    Do you think kitty suffered?  No one was even willing to donate a dollar towards having her checked over, and I was willing to do it at my own expense.  

Sadly, even if I made a mistake there is no way to learn from it.   I will probably never run into that kind of situation again, unless I start hanging out at apartments looking for stray cats.    But I do know, that if I do, I will not ask for the tenant's opinions again.

Is that right?

Mona

I believe that if you found a kitty like that again, you should take it and not care about what the tenents think. They obviously didn't care enough to take in the kitten in when you were feeding it.

As for not seeing her again, you never know. Someone may have taken her too.

I'm sorry that you feel bad. I sort of went through the same situation with another cat. I felt that I should have been more aggressive in caring for him and in the end he disappeared too. The best thing we can do is learn from our experiences so that we do things differently the next time.

Hope you feel better.

You did what you could under the circumstances. I agree with New Kittenmom. If you come across a situation like that with another cat, just take the cat. Don't say anything to anyone. If they genuinely cared about the cat, they would have cared for it properly instead of just tossing it scraps every now and then. You really don't know what happened to the cat. She very well could be alive. Perhaps another kind soul (like you) took pity on the poor thing and took him or her in. 

I agree with these comments above.  My question, if you were  prepared to take the responsibility:  food, vet, finding a shelter who would admit her - why didnt you planned on adopting her yourself  if she got OK from the vet -  THIS is the safest bet..  You adopting, or you finding her a good adoption home.

There is also the sub-variation you are foster home cooperating with some shelter.

Good luck!

One cannot take in every stray cat they find.    Once you are married you have to have.some sort of agreement as to whether to take in a new cat.   Remember, this cat probably had fleas, worms and other such problems that I did not want to introduce to my other cats.    And my older cats would have been stressed by the situation.   I lost my precious Chirble just six months after I saw this stray cat, and I am so glad that I had not stressed her further.    I got Chirble from the Humane Society, and all of my other previous cats had also been strays.     I feel I have done my part.   I have rescued:   Gidget - from an apartment complex not even in my city; Cinder, from the apartment complex I lived in with Gidget.   I wasn't even allowed to have any cats there, but I took in two.    Then, a cat was thrown out of a car in front of my boyfriend's car, and he brought her home.   She became my cat just because he would not share in the responsibility of vet care.    Her name was Spooky and thank God I got married when I did because I was finally able to give Spooky the kind of life she deserved.     Then there was Prancer, who I had spayed and gave her to a girlfriend. 

 I feel I am doing my part, but I just can't adopt every stray I might know of no matter what stress it puts on my other cats.

I can understand why someone would tell me to adopt the cat if I cared about it, but I am only responsible for taking care of  some of the strays I find - not all.

Mona

I am not sure Stefan was challenging your decision.  It just seemed logical, from what you originally wrote, that you might have been able to take her in.

But as you've said, we can't take them all.  Your decision was based on the information you had and your circumstances at the time, so you did what you had the power to do.

It is such a sad situation, too.  Please don't use up time feeling badly about it.  You did your best, period.

I agree with Ondine´s analysis and comments.

Tx for caring, Mona Kloos.

Thank you to all the people who are being understanding about me not being able to take in the stray cat I was concerned about.

Mona

Mona Kloos said:

 
Thank you to all the people who are being understanding about me not being able to take in the stray cat I was concerned about.

Mona

Click to expand...

 Ahhh, the heart ache of every rescuer!!! Sometimes, all we can do is pray, hope and trust that the fates of the cats will be okay.  If you are willing and ABLE, you can trap and TNVR a cat. Sometimes you will be able to secure the trust of a neighbor who is willing to SECRETLY let you place a winter shelter in  remote area which is definitely much safer than sleeping in car engines. At that point, you have done all that you can do and need to move on to the next project. The fact that you kept going back to check on the kitty shows all of us that you are blessed with compassion, dedication and courage!

And please don't dwell on the unknown. Trust that the kitty is better off wherever she is now. Cat lovers can be found everywhere and they tend to be discreet, for obvious reasons, as we all know.

And here's a life lesson: my first JC was an indoor-only cat - vaccinated, fed top-end food and was PUT TO SLEEP because of cancer at a very young age - it was "just his time". My only regret was that he did sooo want to get to enjoy the outside like the working cats, play in the sunshine, chase bugs in the lawn- I tried to protect him and he still died. I have two former-ferals (tamed as adults, one had lived over 6 years of his life in the fields behind the city park) who are both over 14yo and fed O.N.E. and 9 Lives wet food - both in great health....so who knows??