I got a call from UPS last night saying they had a package for me to pick up because they had tried to deliver it 3 times & I wasn't around. I knew what it was because I had seen the first delivery notice (the 2nd two must have blown away in the wind & rain we've been having). It was Smokey's Urn. I say it like she care what happens with her ashes, but the truth is she doesn't. I care though. It was so much harder than I expected. I was excited because I want to get her out of the white box her ashes came back in from the vet & put her in something that expresses my deep love for her. When I opened the box took it out & looked at her picture on the front I started to cry. You see I chose my favorite picture of here where she is looking at me over her sholder & had them impose that on a backgroud of green grass. It was just like she was looking at me from where I imagine her to be right now. Oh how I miss her. I miss her voice, her smell, her crabbyness, her dainty little paws, I miss everything about her. I love my boys don't get me wrong, but I still miss her. It's been a little over a month & just the other night I looked at one of my kittens & almost called him Smokey. I think I'm going to go this weekend & buy a shelf to put up so I can have the urn somewhere nice. I just didn't think I would be this sad about her urn.