Help socializing two semi feral 7 month old cats

We recently took in two semi feral cats around 6 weeks ago. They were healthy and weighed in at 5.1 and 5.7 lbs during their visit to get fixed before arriving at our place. They look to be between 6-7months old and have likely added a pound or two in weight.

Over time we have made great progress, they no longer hide constantly and will even come out while we are around. We even have a routine of tossing treats their way (Whiskas Temptations...they love them!) and they end up getting really close 1-2 feet), and also love playing with a mouse we have on a string.

Right now they do keep their distance and we are hoping the crew in this forum could give us some advice/tips/tricks to get them comfortable with us petting them.

Is it just a matter of time, or are there things we can do to help the process along?

In the back of our minds we are always a little anxious that they will never like being petted.

Thank you for the help!!

One thing that helped me a LOT when socializing my ferals was buying them a large cat tree. I put it right in the middle of the living room so they could climb up high and watch us, while feeling "in control" of the room, because they were looking down on us.

This probably helped get them comfortable more than anything else we did.

If you don't want to go the cat tree route, you can also buy shelves that you can put up, or make your own pretty cheaply. I buy shelving board at Lowe's (they will even cut it there for you, for free) and then use hot glue to carpet them. Then I use screws and L brackets to put them up. I have a whole room that is just cat shelves and they have held up well over the last year since I put them up, and we have a lot of cats so they get a lot of use! 

That is a great idea thank you for the suggestions!! They really do feel more comfortable when they are above us or at least eye level...

I had a rather unorthodox method of getting my two ferals (see below) tame enough to pet and it took a huge dose of patience, alot of time (almost 3 years), and a rather large helping of "jealousy." 

Here is a picture of my two feral cats. 


Both of these beauties wandered up within two weeks of one another...BOTH trailing four adorable kittens EACH!  I finally (with alot of help from some friends with traps and knowledge of ferals) trapped all the kittens and both of the mothers and had them spayed and then released--the one in the cage was just back from surgery and still confined.   Since I kept the kittens in the cages, the moms hung around after being released.  The kittens were old enough to eat of their own.  Miraculously (also with alot of help from all my "former" friends and family), I found good homes for ALL EIGHT kittens!!!!) This was in April 2010.....and the two moms, Murphy (black and white) and Shuga (tortoise shell) are still hanging around and are no longer what I would call "feral."  Murphy especially is very tame--she follows me around the yard talking to me; goes with us when we walk the dog; and wants to be petted all the time...on her terms of course--but  I can't pick her up and she certainly won't jump in my lap.  Shuga comes and goes...leaves for days, sometimes weeks, and then returns for food and minor petting...still very skiddish but does seem to trust me now.

It took almost 3 full years to get Murphy tame enough to pet...she would want to be close to me, but didn't want me to touch her.......the helping of "jealousy" is what "broke her".....in the meantime, another stray cat (not feral at all...I'm sure someone dumped him) came to live in our yard...big long haired black  beauty that was a love hussy from the moment he arrived.  I'd go out the door and he'd want to be petted and loved on....Murphy watching at a distance and giving her disgusted and indignant meows.... after about a week of this, she gradually got closer and closer....until, she came right up to also get some petting .....Bart (the black stray) apparently convinced her that whatever this strange behavior called "petting" was, it certainly seemed to be something good! 

So.....if you happen to have another cat around that DOES like petting........see if the jealousy bug might bite

The only other suggestion is that even now, I mostly tend to let them approach me...if I go to them, it's very slow and if they hesitate or look the least bit uncomfortable or wary, I back off... I keep talking to them and being close, but let them know I respect their boundaries and their "space" and won't touch them unless they want to be touched.  That's hard for a cat lover, but with a feral or semi-feral, it's very important.

I have two very spoiled inside boys that never, ever go outside....I haven't ever really considered bringing the two females or the big black boy inside.  I give them food, water and a dry, safe place to sleep in the garage and plenty of attention, so I'm just calling them my outside furbabies.  All have been spayed/neutered so no more kittens! 

Good luck!

Welcome to the forums and thank you so much for rescuing these two kittens.  A few suggestions: 

1.  Always try to sit at their level.  Do not loom over them.  It is very frightening for them to have a human looming down on them.  Sit on the floor when you are engaging with them.  Talk in a soft soothing voice.  If you don't have much to say, read aloud to them from a book/magazine/paper.

2.  Offer yummy delicious treats when working on socializing.  Gerber stage 2 chicken/turkey is known as "kitty crack".  Just be sure the only ingredients are chicken/turkey and water, no added spices.  This is just for a treat not a meal replacement.  You can offer a small taste on a bowl or plate, then move to offering it off a spoon and finally offering it from your fingers.  The baby food is also a great way to get medication into a cat.  You can also use delicious cat treats.  Offering a treat when you are visiting is a good way for them to associate you as something good.  You bring the food/treats. 

3.  Playing.  Cats love the da bird toy.  Also catnip is enjoyed by many.  Get them to engage.  Jackson Galaxy aka "The Cat Daddy"  suggests something called "Eat Play Love"  You want to play with your cats until they get really tired (this is the hunt), then reward them with a yummy meal (eat) and finally give them lots of love.

4.  You can also try Feliway Plug ins and/or Composure feline treats or Composure liquid Max.  The feliway helps cats to feel more secure in their surroundings.  The Composure is a calming treat that helps with fears.

5.  A cat tree is a great idea. After you get them used to it, my cats love it near windows so they can look out as well as enjoying the warm sunshine!

Hope this helps you out a bit.

Hi

We have a very similar situation to yours with our 2 feral kittens.

I guess they are about 8 months old now and we have had them since last Christmas.

At first we had them isolated in a bedroom and started getting near to them by using the Gerbers #2 chicken and chicken gravy trick,first with a spoon and then finger feeding.Very carefully just touching them while they licked off the finger but stopping if there was any sign of pulling away.

They improved a lot when they were allowed the run of the cottage about 2 months ago--here is the thing---

After all this time the kittens only allow Tony to really stroke and pet them as he feeds them all the time---so the food thing is a major factor.

Also,no picking up is allowed at all and if Tony tries to bring his face down to them,they take off like a shot from a cannon.

So patience is the word,allowing them to do things at their own speed and dont forget the Gerbers Baby food

Regards

Tony and Kat (owned by ex-feral kittens,Muse and Shadow)

Thank you all for the input - this is very helpful. Food really does appear to be the way to go. Will definitely try the Gerger baby food suggested above - never though I'd buy that till I had a child!

Best,

Greg

Hi,

I have a situation with 9 month old siblings I rescued in January.  They were turned into the shelter at about 2 months and were with a foster family until I adopted them at 5 months old. I wanted to adopt 2 cats together and was open to any combination/situation that the shelter had available.  While at the shelter looking, a volunteer told me about the brother sister pair but they HAD to be adopted out together. 

The male, Max is very alpha, but has turned out to be such a sweet, mischievous and friendly guy, but his sister, Ruby is afraid of everything!  The funny part is she will let me pat her and even headbutt me during meal times, but runs if she sees me coming.  She must like me since she follows me into rooms, always keeping her distance. I can tell she, too, has a sweet disposition. 

Neither will let me hold them, and I get that, but cannot understand her behavior.  I hope she will come around and at least not run away if I walk into a room.  I understand why the folks at the shelter felt they had to be adopted out together. Max has really helped her with the little socialization she responds to.  

I love this site.  Reading all of this thread, I learned of the Gerber baby food and the Composure treats. Thanks for sharing that info and it's helps hearing other kitty parents have similar issues!  

Lola

Hi

Well your story is all too familiar and is a situation that we share with our 2 kittens(brother and sister.

We rescued them at 4 months and have now had them since Christmas 2013.

They re both lovable kittens,especially the female(muse) who will allow Tony to stroke her all day if he had the time.She jumps on his lap while we watch TV and will allow just about any type for stroking from him--

laying on her back legs splayed wide open and purring her head off.

The male(Shadow ) will also lay on his back and allow Tony to stroke him,purring away but has not reached the lap stage yet.

Neither of the kittens will let Tony pick them up yet.

Here is the thing,when I walk into the room,both kittens will usually scatter---Muse has only now allowed me a very short stroke at times but Shadow--no way.

We put this down to the fact that Tony feeds the kittens,cleans out their litter boxes etc.

For me(Kat) this situation is very frustrating as both kittens are beautiful and very loving to Tony.

When we first got the kittens,we decided to allow them to move at their own pace and we have stuck to that plan---so we are always there for them,give them attention when they want it--and I for one

am waiting patiently for them to come to me for love and attention.

Guess what I am saying is----be patient with the kittens.

Regards Kat and Tony(owned by ex-feral kittens Muse and Shadow)

I haven't seen this mentioned yet, but in the effort for full disclosure; it's entirely possible that you may never have cuddly house kitties. The bulk of my rescue endeavors are with feral moms and babies, and to have nice house cats we try to get them by 4 months. At 6/7 months you are kind of on the cusp of having cats that may not be well suited to living indoors. It's always worth a shot because some surprise you, but just be warned that this may be as close as you get.

A few tips:

Try to block off places that they can hide down low (under beds, back of closets, etc), and encourage them to go high instead. The shelves and cat post suggestions were spot on. When they burrow down low you are almost guaranteed not to make good progress, because any interaction you have with them is going to consist of you towering over them.

I would not let them have free access to food. Don't leave the food bowl down as you WANT them to associate you with food. And always try hand feeding first, even if it's to lure them a bit closer, then let them have the bowl. Every couple of days try to get them closer. Don't be greedy in the begining or you'll all get frustrated. Find a starting point and work from there, even if it's 10 feet across the room (though it sounds like they are getting much closer than that).

As for the Gerber baby food - someone said make sure it doesn't contain spices, but also make sure it doesn't contain onion!

And lastly, I have one cat that is semi feral. We've had her since she was 4-5 months old. She was a TNR cat in our neighborhood who belonged to a litter of 4 that I had sterilized and vaccinated. One night while taking the trash out she darted into my laundry room while the door was opened and 7 years later she has not stepped foot outside again. She LOVES being inside, however, she is not a cuddly house kitty. Over the years she has settled in pretty good, and to my husband and I she is very affectionate. She will rub our legs and sit in the same room as us, sometimes even on the back of the couch. At night she sleeps on my legs and loves to have her head scratched, but if I attempt to touch the rest of her body she sometimes bolts. I could never lean down and pick her up or pet her, and when people come to our house she hides. I have family members that have never even seen her. She is the sweetest thing and we adore her, but there is no doubt that she is feral.

When it comes to handling her (applying topical meds, vaccinating, etc) I have to corner her in the bathroom and it usually involves a lot yelling on her part, and sometimes exploded anal glands. I hate doing it to her, but it's an evil necessity. She is wise to me now so it takes some ingenuity on my part and some hunger on hers. I can't trap her anymore, she has figured that one out. Luckily it's not done a lot because it seriously sets back all our progress, but these are all things to think about when bringing ferals into the home. It's not for everyone, but for us, when she jumps on the bed at night when the house is quiet and kneads the blankets as she gives us eye kisses, it's all worth it!

Good luck! It sounds like you are making good progress.

I'm finding this thread pretty helpful myself so thanks. I have my little guy, Clyde. He was living outside our front door and he just started coming inside maybe a week ago. At first it was just for the night but now he's staying.

I have to say he is just the cutest thing. Sorry. I just loved him right away for some reason. We went to the vet and he's healthy and probably only 8 months old. He needs to get his booster shots and then he gets neutered.

He spends a lot of time by himself and I'm giving him his space. I hope one day he can relax more...I can pet him a little little bit but not really yet. I will try the baby food and making sure I'm on his level.

I will be glad to accept any other advice...thanks