I know this is the wrong forum but I am sufffering please help

georgiesmommy

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i know this isnt the place but i dont know where to turn iam not handling this well at all..i recently had to put all of my 2 year old cats into foster care so that I don't lose my home...but I am distraught..i need help...I cant stop thinking the things going on and on in my head..I went to a website yesterday trying to show myself that cats do not feel or think the same way I do, that I am putting my human emotions on an animal and making myself sick, but it had this artcile about 2 cats who's owner died and they ended up in a shelter but would not eat so they got put into foster care and one recovered but one had to be put down...i keep thinking my babies are scared, sad, wondering why i sent them away why i dont love them, why they cant come home, where am i, that they want to come home, that they miss me, that they are thinking about home, are they with each other, are they really in foster? are they ion cages please I hope they are not pining for me or home i hope they totally forgot about me and are perfectly happy in the week thats passed...im just overwhelmed by thoughts of them of guilt of picking my place to live over loving them (ridiculous i know but that what i feel i did, like their lives were worth less than mine)...does anyone have any thoughts on how they may be faring? i love them so much ...for some reason i heard this song my sons listen to and one of the lyrics is I miss your pretty face and i always used to tell one of them how much i loved his beautiful face and i got sad then another thought bumped it up a notch saying all im thinking is how I feel and maybe they are thinking how sad they are that they cant see my face...or sit in my lap or anything..god im so bad this is terrible i am a grown woman brought to my emotional knees by this loss i miss them so much i wish i could bring them all home
 

feralvr

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I am so, so, so, so sorry to hear you had to do this.. :alright: :hugs: So sorry. I have tears for you over this and can't imagine how utterly distressed I would be in your shoes. My heart breaks for you. How many cats did you have that were two years old? Did they go to a "foster home" OR a shelter where they told you they would be fostered? Still, with the latter, I am sure you could trust them if they told you that. Maybe you can keep tabs on them? That may help you to know they are alright. I hope that others come along who have had to do the same and I am thinking this thread may be better suited in the SOS Forum because I think others have posted in that forum having to do the same.

I feel your sadness completely. It sounds like you had no other option at all and this was a last resort. I just hope that you will be able to get some news on your kitties and updates on how they are doing. I am sure they are a bit confused and frightened right now but being in a foster home is much better than a shelter - and they WILL adjust. I hope they all get adopted together and that would be an answer to a prayer. :cross: :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes:
 
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georgiesmommy

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i had to send 12 away..believe it or not i had over 25 cats and kittens i still have 13 at home but 9 are actually mine but id had them since they were babies the ones i had to send away and 2 in particular i didnt want to but everyone said it was for the best for them bc my house was too small and it was getting dirty and they needed medical care i cant afford but i loved on all of them..yes all 25 everyday i came home from work and thank you for saying  such nice things..to be honest the people who took them always swear they are a rescue foster group only but i had someone send me and article about them that they just drive the animals to an out of town shelter to be put down but when i called the group that wrote that they said they could not substantiate those claims ..so confused..keep thinking of course the people who took them would tell me beautiful lies maybe to take them from what they perceive as a monster (me) even just to put them down after they take them they want no contact from me saying they are doing me a huge favor and i am bothering them...i just miss my cats

 
 

feralvr

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You do have many cats and I know how easily a few can become many. I think you did the right thing for them if you were not able to afford and care for them the way you wanted. I am glad that you still have cats with you and I hope that number will be easier for you to handle financially. You have a good heart with good intentions and it sounds as if you got over your head with being able to manage that many cats. It may be for the best - for you and for your cats. Still extremely difficult to go through and I am so sorry. :alright: :hugs: Mega, mega vibes that all of your kitties that you had to part with are going to find forever loving homes. Try to stay positive. :vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes:
 
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georgiesmommy

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thank you so much and I am trying to stay possitive but everytime I feel normal i feel quilty about it..what right do i have to feel normal when they may still be terrified without me..they lost everything in one and had no warning..their home, their family their sibling...they must be so hurt and confused...i need to know if they are ok but no one will tell me maybe they were put down god i hope not
 

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I would have faith in the rescue organization that has your cats now. These organizations are full of people who dedicate their lives to helping animals, often for little or no pay at all. I can't see a reason why they would just resort to euthanizing them...they use their resources the best that they can, even for the cats that are in poor health. I would be more reassured knowing that they went to a rescue organization instead of an animal control agency, even still...the animal control here in Victoria, BC reaches out to local shelters and rescues so that the cats can have a better chance of getting adopted.

It sounds like this was the best option for your cats, so you have to give yourself credit for making such a difficult decision that will ultimately benefit them. They will receive the proper care and medical attention funded for by the organization (and a lot of veterinary offices work alongside with rescues at discounted costs or even pro-bono), and get settled in to their foster homes where they'll get lots of attention and care until they find their forever homes.

I would reach out to close friends and families and ask for them to make a small donation to the organization (food, litter, toys, cat beds, money), whether it goes directly to your cats or not it will help provide the rescue with more resources to take care of all their kitties. Maybe you could even volunteer with them from time to time to see what kind of amazing work they do and be a part of it.
 

jfed

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Please ensure your kitties are all spayed/neutered, and consider all other options before taking in any more cats than you can financially/spaciously care for. That's a lot of work for one person, and kitties need lots of undivided attention!!
 

feralvr

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thank you so much and I am trying to stay possitive but everytime I feel normal i feel quilty about it..what right do i have to feel normal when they may still be terrified without me..they lost everything in one and had no warning..their home, their family their sibling...they must be so hurt and confused...i need to know if they are ok but no one will tell me maybe they were put down god i hope not
:alright: :hugs: :grphug: Sometimes, hun, it is best to just let go - to know that you did your very, very best in those moments trying to save/rescue so many. You DO have a heart of gold and we really are only ONE person and can only do so much for so many that need us desperately that we end up taking in more than we can truly help. I hope that makes sense to you. It is so easy to keep taking in more and more kitties but I think you are realizing that there has to be a limit to what one person can manage and handle. I am just so sorry you are in such pain. Keeping you close to my heart and in my prayers, Georgiesmommy. Take good care of the kitties that you still have and leave the rest in the hands of the rescue that you entrusted them too. You had no other choice at this point. You did the right thing even though your heart pains you so. :vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes: :heart3:
 

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Sometimes you just have to trust The Cat Goddess to help your beloved babies along.  We see miracles in rescue all the time.  A family just lost their home months after the husband lost his job, and they had to move in with family members who are allergic to cats to they brought the two they adopted from us back to us.  One of them has already found a new home with a couple who fell in love with her and think she's a perfect companion for their young cat who is just a couple of months younger than she is (she's just a year old).  For a nearly adult cat to get adopted in the first flower of kitten season is clearly a miracle and I know these cats have guardian angels because we pulled them from a high kill shelter to start with, or they would not even be alive today.  Our rescue group makes a lifetime commitment to our cats & dogs so they can always come back for any reason.  There is nothing more you can do for the cats who are no longer with you, so like @Feralvr just said, you need to let go of what you can't change and forge ahead with what you CAN change, and make sure all your remaining cats are neutered and spayed and vaccinated.  You can take better care of them now that you have half as many.  As a rescue person, I KNOW what it is to have that many cats and it is NOT sustainable over the long term.  I had about 30 here in May and June and while everyone was cared for, it was a huge financial and emotional and even physical strain.  We get those numbers during kitten season sometimes, but there is no way we could individually house that many cats properly over the long haul, we MUST adopt them out. Keep thinking positive, send your cats love and calming energy rather than tears and worry, and it will help them, and you too.
 

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You are going through such a bad time, & even though it was the right thing to do for both you & your cats' sakes, it's still very difficult. But if you didn't have a home you wouldn't be able to have any animals. Please try to 'let them go';you need to focus on looking after yourself & your other cats. Don't let your grief stop you.
Having so many cats can be overwhelming & limit your ability to care for them properly, especially while you are so distraught & grieving, & especially if you're on your own, no matter how much you love them, & I know you do.

I'm sorry this sounds harsh, my heart does go out to you, you have a big loving heart. It takes one to take in so many cats. You need to keep your place clean, for you & your cats; that's a lot of work, & you have to do it. If even the number of cats you still have is too much, don't be afraid to do what is for the best in the long run. A handful of cats you can properly care for is better than a lot of cats you can't.
We've all lost animals & so understand what you must be going through. Be of courage, determine to do the very best you can & please look after yourself so you can look after your animals, ok? Bless you.
 
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