Find myself crying over my sweetie that passed away a few months ago :'(

My beautiful baby boy Toolouse passed away several months ago, and I almost can't take seeing his picture This cat was born right in my bathroom along with his brother (thank goodness I still have) had them all there lives...  He was only 1 1/2 years old and went into kidney failure, and it really took me by surprise my young boy had this problem. My husband and I did everything we possibly could until enough was just enough and we couldn't put him through anymore and we made the very hard decision to let him go. I had to take him myself that day and the morning of I spent every moment with him on the couch snuggled up in his favorite blanket, he was very weak but still managed to purr the whole time....Long story short, my heart is still in pieces over him. I cant hardly talk about him when someone asks where he is, I cant stand to see his picture...I have had cats for my entire life and this one passing away has really done a number on me. Any advice for moving on? Some people just look at me like I'm crazy or like my parents say "it's just a cat".....it makes me want to come unglued when I hear that!! Just had to vent tonight, found myself upset and crying over him again. Comments are very much appreciated!!

I am so sorry.  I think it's harder when a kitty that is so young has a chronic illness and passes.  That may be why this is so difficult for you.  It's always hard but when a kitty has a long healthy life before they get sick it's easier to process.  Your kitty had a loving home for his short life and is now free of pain.  

Your beautiful Toolouse may have been a cat, but you loved him with all your heart and soul. Your heart does not know the difference between animal and human, it just knows it was dealt a terrific loss. Reaching out to others is truly difficult when you hurt so much, but the most compassionate self action you can do is to find a support system that will provide you with the understanding and comfort you need. That you will find on this site as we all know the anguish you are going through and will try to offer what comfort we can. Please know you are not alone in your grief, we'll do what we can to lighten your burden by sharing your sorrow with our own tears and prayers. My Chrissy died 15 months ago, and I still feel an awful emptiness in my soul and cry when I think of her dying. It IS better, we'll never be the same as we were before, but grief will find a new life order for us. In time you'll think of your sweet boy with smiles instead of tears, he would want it no other way. I'll cry for what you are going through, just know you are not alone. Bless you for loving so much to hurt so bad. RIP beautiful Toolouse, you were greatly loved!

Di and Bob said:

 
Your beautiful Toolouse may have been a cat, but you loved him with all your heart and soul. Your heart does not know the difference between animal and human, it just knows it was dealt a terrific loss. Reaching out to others is truly difficult when you hurt so much, but the most compassionate self action you can do is to find a support system that will provide you with the understanding and comfort you need. That you will find on this site as we all know the anguish you are going through and will try to offer what comfort we can. Please know you are not alone in your grief, we'll do what we can to lighten your burden by sharing your sorrow with our own tears and prayers. My Chrissy died 15 months ago, and I still feel an awful emptiness in my soul and cry when I think of her dying. It IS better, we'll never be the same as we were before, but grief will find a new life order for us. In time you'll think of your sweet boy with smiles instead of tears, he would want it no other way. I'll cry for what you are going through, just know you are not alone. Bless you for loving so much to hurt so bad. RIP beautiful Toolouse, you were greatly loved!

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Denice said:

 
I am so sorry.  I think it's harder when a kitty that is so young has a chronic illness and passes.  That may be why this is so difficult for you.  It's always hard but when a kitty has a long healthy life before they get sick it's easier to process.  Your kitty had a loving home for his short life and is now free of pain.  

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~~~~Thank you guys so much, you are all so kind here! I think it's just difficult, like you said because he was so young and it was so sudden! Because I had my Siamese, Bonsai that grew up with me..he was 22 years old, (im only 21 he was with my family even before I was haha)...and when he passed, it broke my heart but it was expected and we all knew it was coming, and there was that degree of he had a long happy life!! Also, it's always been my mother and I having cats because I lived at home, now I'm married, and these little guys were sort of "my first babies" on my own ya know? And to have that happen just kills me. I rescue cats and I see them pass away unfortunately and although it's less sad then my own toolouse passing away, it always makes me cry, never get's easier. What I get for caring I suppose, wouldn't have it any other way tho. And you are completely correct Di & Bob when you say my heart doesn't know the difference in animal and human, describes me completely and I just love it Thank you guys again for your kind words!

Denice said:

I am so sorry.  I think it's harder when a kitty that is so young has a chronic illness and passes.  That may be why this is so difficult for you.  It's always hard but when a kitty has a long healthy life before they get sick it's easier to process.  Your kitty had a loving home for his short life and is now free of pain.  

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My condolences. It'll get easier with time, but there will always be the question in your mind of why he was taken at such a young age. There's no set time for grieving, and it doesn't matter that he was "just a cat". He shared your daily life, so obviously his absence is felt even more than that of a person, for example, that you had more sporadic contact with. He was family.

Toolouse  

My4LLMA said:

Toolouse

 

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Thank you so much You are all so kind