Redirected cat aggression in my two males

A couple of tiny strides and one small set back today. While I was at work, my bf let Vincent out most of the day. He made a trail of treats to Leo's door which he ate. He acted fine when Leo's was playing at his door too. Tonight I fed them treats through a crack in the door which happened fine twice but when I did it a third time i think I opened the door too much and vinny hissed. Leo hissed back so I closed the door and did not reward that behavior. I barely opened the crack in the door larger but it was enough to make vinny uncomfortable. So we are just going to slow it down more and try the treats and scent swapping more. I'm going to try to see if Vincent will go into Leo's room when Leo's not in there too.

Even though he got a bit uptight it didn't seem to take vinny long to calm down. He hissed a few times at me, but I just left him alone and in less than an hour he was eating his food, taking treats and playing with us again. But either way, I think things are going too well to consider that any more than a small set back and an indication that we just need to go slow.

Ok maybe it was a bigger set back than I thought. I was giving Vinny a treat last night, and suddenly he decided, Oh wait, you're the evil woman who gave me the treats when that other cat made me mad. I may have inadvertently made him distrustful of me again. He hissed at me and acted distrustful. We were on our way out of the house for an hour anyway, so we just closed the door, went about our business. But this has gotten me so sick.

I spent the night in Leo's room and my BF slept in the room with Vinny. He said Vinny was normal with him. I walked into the room this AM to get shoes and some clothes before work and Vinny was watchful, but he didn't make any noises or try to get away from me (I also did my best to ignore him, too). I'm so afraid that I've done damage to my relationship with this cat unintentionally. I would never do anything to hurt this animal and now I feel like everything is all my fault. How do I get him to come back from this? I know we need to go backwards now to start from scent swapping again.

Are there any good books out there we should read?  What do you think about Cat Vs Cat by Pam Johnson-Bennett or The Cat Whisperer by Meishelle Nagelschnieder?  I've read Jackson Galaxy's book, but it's not really meant as a behavior book even though it's got tid-bits. 

Just remember that this process can take a long time.  You will have setbacks along the way.  The first thing I would suggest is to just breathe and try to relax.  Vinny is certainly picking up on all of your angst.  Ignoring his hissing is good.  Also direct some of his energy into play.  Does he have special toys he likes?  Do you have a da bird or wand toy?  Work on playing with him and then rewarding him with a small treat after a play session.  When he is out and about, don't hover.  Just let him be.  He isn't used to you watching or following his every step.  If he goes to Leo's door and hisses and growls remove him and consider blocking his way to Leo's door.  When it is time for him to go to his room and Leo to come out, put him in the room, give him a treat, spend a bit of time with him and leave.  Do the same with Leo.  Allow each cat to go to the others door and sniff, only intervene if there is lots of hissing and growling or yowling.  Some hissing is ok.  Keep doing the scent swapping. 

We used to take a long string and put it under the door.  My son would stay outside of the door in the hall way with one cat and I would go inside the closed door with the other cat.  The cats loved playing with the moving string.  We would also give yummy chicken rewards. 

As for book suggestions I have read Cat vs Cat as well as Think Like a Cat and The Cat Bible.  All have good suggestions.

Sometimes if the separate rooms isn't working, it's time to try another approach such as each cat in a large crate/carrier sitting next to each other or one cat in a crate with other allowed out.  These should be very short supervised visits.  Vinny may not be ready for this yet, but if you keep the interactions light, provide yummy rewards or try to redirect through play, it might work.

So Vinny hasn't been hiss or growling at Leo's door (neither has Leo actually). They have both been receiving strenuous play with the same fishing pole toy 2 x daily (before breakfast and before bedtime). They have played via the crack under the door and both seem comfy in the living room even if they hear each other through the door.

So things are going well because we are allowing it to happen slowly.

My question is, sometimes Vinny sit outside Leo's door (and vise versa). They don't seem to be upset. No hissing, no growling. Is this ok to let them do? I was thinking it was almost like them being comfortable near each other but behind the barrier of the door, but I wanted to get some opinions.

It sounds like things have settled down a bit.  It is fine for the cats to spend time outside of each others door.  You can even have someone inside the closed room and someone outside of the closed room and see if the cats will engage in a game of string through the door.  You can reward with treats.  If you hear hissing and growling just stop.  They might really enjoy it.  Allow it to go on for only a short time.  You want to stop it before hissing or growling if possible.  After the session reward with treats.

Yeah sometimes they play because we keep toys and/ or a hand towel under the door for them to catch onto. No growling, no hissing. Vinny was sitting there last night while Leo was meowing to be let out and was he had his eyes closed. And rolled over onto his back and stretched out, paws touched Leo's at the door! No hissing or growling. Once we put vinny up, Leo ran over to vinnys door and hung out there. I don't think vinny was at the door though, when I put Leo up and opened the door vinny was asleep on the bed.

I'm happy to read this.  It sounds like you're making good progress!!  Good for you for having the patience to take it nice and slow.  

How are Leo and Vinny doing?  Hopefully all is well.

They are doing well! Still behind closed doors but letting them explore outside their own rooms for longer now and success switching food bowls today. The blankets being switched every other day was working well so we tried good bowls for the first time today. They both ate from them.

Been using play therapy with a new toy they both love! Bought a da bird toy and both cats adore it. Vinny's little tail is held so high when he "catches" it and carries it. I think it's working for his confidence.

This weekend I am building some floating shelves that lead stair step up to the top of a tall bookshelf we have in our living room. I think having this extra thing for vinny will help him with confidence, I saw it on a Jackson galaxy episode. Leo likes them too so I may build some on the other side too so they can both choose to be on them if they want and aren't having to fight for any resources. I have only one cat tree so I'm buying a second.

If the food thing goes well this week, I'm going to see if Vincent will go anywhere near Leo's room when Leo's in another room. I will supervise him without hovering and start by allowing 5 or 10 mins at a time.

We did catch a neighborhood cat outside our house late one night, but since we started using the feliway Leo's not sprayed.

I know redirected aggression can be one of the hardest things to come back from but we are going to try to be creative, encouraging and not let little things get us down if we can.

We are trying to think only a few days at a time not weeks so we don't feel discouraged. After milestones are met, then are we only moving forward.

Thank you all for checking in! It means so much.

You are doing a fabulous job.  I really commend you for taking things slowly.  Leo and Vinny will be so much better off when the process is complete.  I love Jackson Galaxy.  He has such great ideas.   His idea of vertical space is so helpful.  I have one tree dweller and one bush dweller so in my house it works well that one likes to be up high and one rarely jumps at all!!

Keep us updated.

I aka ways thought vinny was a bush dweller but since he's had access to the cat tree he seems like he's comfortable up high and maybe he and Leo fought over that position a little.

I'm loving this update!  You really are doing great with them!

If you can; I'd love to see pictures of your floating shelves when you are done!

Good work!  

I'm still working on the shelving and once we get that in place we are going to try the wooden screen door approach to re-introduction very slowly. Both of them hate to be cooped up in their respective rooms so we think playing with them through a screen door (my bf and me playing with da bird on either side of the screen with a cat each) might be the best way right now to have them "see" each other. It seems they both react well to redirection better than food/treat motivation when in that place of anxiety.

I'm also still thinking about a calming collar. Vinny would wear it fine but Leo is the Houdini who gets his collar off. His record is 10 minutes.

I'll post pics soon of the shelves once we get them in place.

I absolutely love the dedication that both you and BF are putting into this!!  

Thanks so much for the update.  Can't wait to see pictures.  I hope Vinny and Leo do well with the screen door in place.  You are working so hard with these boys.  I just know in the long run it will all pay off.

Update time:  We've started a sort of faux room swap with the boys. This entails by BF taking Leo into our 'Man cave" room (a spare room that houses our TV and all our media stuff that's right next door to Leo's room which is our spare bedroom) while I stay out in the main part of the house with Vincent. We tried this first on Tuesday night. I put Leo in the man cave with a treat of some of his fav wet food and one of his fav feather toys to help distract him. He didn't need much distraction because he loves this room. It's sort of a neutral room of the house because both cats are allowed in there with us only when we're in there and otherwise the door is kept closed. There's some expensive electrical equipment and such in there so we only want them to have access when we're in there to monitor them. They both love this room, with the leather couch, and a dark wicker chair that I have put a cushion on that they both love to lay on. It's a shitty old chair that I've had since college so I allow them to scratch on to their hearts content and it keeps them off the leather couch, too. 

So, with Leo in the man cave, I allowed Vincent to come out of the bedroom and we played with Da Bird for a little while and then I let him catch it and hang onto it. it gives him confidence to be able to drag it around the house after he's finally "caught it" so I let him just play with it in the living room while I dried dishes in the kitchen. We have a great room so I can monitor him well during this. After a few minutes, he dragged the feathers to an area of the living room closer to the kitchen and right in front of the hallway where Leo's bedroom door was wide open. He dropped Da Bird and curiously walked toward Leo's room. Leo wasn't making any noise in the other room or anything at this point, so I'm not sure what Vincent thought about this, but he didn't seem nervous, until he got right up to the open door. I watched from the kitchen and when I saw Vinny's tail go down into an inverted U (the book I read said this is something cats do when they are unsure and are afraid of a potential threat), I picked up Da Bird and took it over to the door, and I distracted him with a little play right in the hallway in front of the door. Then, I let him catch it and he dragged it back to the living room. 

A few minutes later, he went back to Leo's door again on his own, he was sniffing and such and this time his tail was straight out in the middle, not down, but not completely up either. He went into Leo's room and I, not wanting to seem like I was hovering but wanting to monitor, picked up Da Bird again and took it into the room and played with Vincent again. He didn't venture too far around the room,  but that might be because I sort of distracted him with play a little. He did sniff around Leo's litter box and the blankets on the bed, but I mostly let him be in the room and played with Da Bird 3 times after he went in on his own for about 10 minutes. 

Vincent wasn't showing signs of wanting to leave, but I wanted to keep sessions short, so I had him follow Da Bird back into the hallway and I shut Leo's door. Then Leo, who heard us playing, started sticking his paws out from under the man cave door and Vincent and Leo engaged in playing with Da Bird together through the door barrier. 

So we are giving this a whirl for a week or two. Short sessions where Vincent gets to go into Leo's room, smell his scent, and play with Da Bird as a reward. If he does well for the next week, I will add a session where Leo goes into Vinny's room as well, but when we allow Vinny back into his own room, I hope having smelled Leo in Leo's room will make him be ok with smelling Leo in his space. I'm being sure to spray the rooms with "Safe Space for cats" from Jackson Galaxy before each session and to rub the other essences on each of them before (self esteem and peacemaker for Vinny and peacemaker and bully remedy for Leo). I think they are working, but even if they aren't, I guess they can't be hurting. 

I think what's going the longest way for Vinny and Leo, honestly, is the play with Da Bird, Feliway diffusers and good ole fashioned time. For Vinny, being observant of his tail placement has been helpful to figure out his moods, I never knew that tail placement was so indicative of a cat's feelings until I read Cat Vs Cat. For Leo, the confident one, his tail is always up in the air, he's always confident. 

 I'll send a new update in a week to see how Vinny has been doing and if we're ready to move on with Leo venturing into Vinny's room at all. It might be two weeks, I'm trying to be optimistic, but also aware of whether or not they are really ready to move forward. I think we're going to do this for a while before we move on to the screen door. And we're still building the shelves. The book I'm reading Cat Vs Cat says specifically that you should give a cat two entrances/exits regarding something like this so they don't have to go the way they came in case the other cat has it blocked or something. We're trying to plan the vertical space with that in mind around our own furniture and wall space without compromising aesthetics. 

Did the same reg above again tonight. Went well 2 x in a row.

You are just amazing in taking such care and patience to be sure your cats will once again reunite and become buddies.  The dedication you have is incredible.  You are to be commended.  I look forward to more Vinny and Leo updates!!!

Thank you so much for coming back and updating the great progress.

It's so nice to be able to give a big update and get encouragement on here. I don't have anyone besides my boyfriend to talk about this with because most people think this is too much work. I mean is it any more work than potty training your puppy or teaching your dog not to chew in your shoes, not in my opinion.

But it really is nice to have people genuinely want to read the updates and give advice or praise. We need it just as much as the cats!

And at this point I hope what we have gone through might help some one else who has this same thing going on.